I’m sitting with a patient who cannot speak but is awake
Insomnia seems to go hand in hand with palliative care
It’s early morning.
The tv is too invasive
So it the radio
So I sit and write quietly with his permission , keeping him company in silence.
We are heading towards the witching hour
3 am, it is thought, to be the time of Jesus’ death.
I only know that because a devout catholic friend, a Filipina nurse, told me on night shift.
Apparently the Chinese think that 3 am is the time we all process our blocked emotions.
I think I believe that could be true.
It is also the time humans flit from our deepest sleep to a lighter one
Too true. And the time of night troubled or light sleepers wake. Every night. But nothing will change the quiet presence of a soothing soul like yours in attendance. God bless you both.
ReplyDeleteGot bless you too🙏
DeleteI always think it's the time when people who are dying, quietly slip away.
ReplyDeleteI can imagine how comforting it must be to have someone close when you are ill and can't sleep. xx
Just being there
DeleteIt's a very special privilege to be sat with someone in almost silence. It's a strange hour, but on occasion a very peaceful one.
ReplyDeleteYou’ve obviously lived it
DeleteWhat happens to those blocked emotions, when you have spent decades working the overnight shifts? Thank you for being there for your patient.
ReplyDeleteYou process them
DeleteYour Catholic friend was misinformed - for those who believe the story, Christ died. at 3pm not 3am. Bel Ami
ReplyDeletelol xx you are a Ben hur fan after all
DeleteWhen i can't sleep, I put on a recorded shipping forecast. You taught me that and I have valued it.
ReplyDeleteIt’s a great comfort
DeleteA lot of babies are born in the small hours. The awkward ones arrived just before the long night shift ended so you were stuck there for another (unpaid) couple of hours.
ReplyDeleteAn interesting comment, I will ask Nu, whe was a midwife
DeleteI was sitting by my mother's side when she passed in 2007 and then by my dad's side when he passed in 2024.
ReplyDeleteI can say it felt imminently more peaceful when they passed as though I could feel them leaving.
You always know when the soul has left
DeleteMy sisters and I were with our Mother when she died. It is hard to explain the feeling in the room after she took her last breath. One sister is a nurse so she understood the medical side of things as well as the practical. You do good work John. You, my sister and so many others are very special people.
ReplyDeleteXx amen Nell xx dearheart
DeleteScott Fitzgerald wrote that in the dark night of the soul,
ReplyDeleteit is always three o'clock in the morning.
Your experience of sitting with a patient who cannot
speak but is awake : The most haunting words I've
read in a long time.
Jesus of Nazareth died at 3 p.m. but it might have felt
like 3 a.m. The Chinese know a thing or two.
Listening to the recorded Shipping Forecast like Kylie
is a great idea. The theme music is cheering.
Yes it was 3 pm...best tell the Catholic nurse.
DeleteI will
DeleteI have been waking lately right around 3:00 a.m. I generally play alphabet games in my head until I fall asleep. I let my dreams process my blocked emotions. They do such a good job that I often wake up in what are not the best moods. There's a reason I block those things.
ReplyDeleteIn my limited experience of being with people who are dying, I have found it to be quite similar to birth, but in reverse. A going from here to there, rather than a coming from there to here.
Ms. Moon, Oddly-- I also wake habitually about 3:00 and play abc games to get back to sleep: countries of the world, girls' names, adjective-noun--awful artichokes...
DeleteIfs funny 3 am has such a significance
DeleteAnonymous- that IS so odd. For some reason, that generally does get me right back to sleep.
DeleteAnd John- it is strange, isn't it? There's so much we really don't understand about ourselves and how we humans work.
3 am is about the time I get up to pee.
ReplyDeleteI used to lol
DeleteSo glad you were there for this patient who needed your quiet presence in those small hours. It is an honor to be there, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteHugs!
It is indeed x
DeleteWhat a comfort you are to your patients. We should all be so fortunate when our time comes.
ReplyDeleteI hope so
DeleteI'm a night owl so often up at 3 a m. I love the peace of dark hours. You were there, lending humanity and comfort. I am still so saddened that my mother passed alone, no one to hold her hand.
ReplyDeleteThe deaths I can think of usually occurred around 11 a m , always a depressing time.
But hey ho, you were off your feet for awhile and had moments to write.
I hate the silence of the middle of the night, it scares me
DeleteSuch a good job you have. Such a comfort for your patients.
ReplyDeleteI wish , I was called away several times to check medication
DeleteMy husband died at 9 in the morning just as we were getting ready to arrange his cremation and a feeling came through me at that exact time. When the hospital called I said I know I felt it. Gigi
ReplyDeleteXxx I understand
DeleteBeing with your patient as he is slowly dying has to be comforting for him. Hospice knows exactly what is important and you do much good.
ReplyDeleteThe hospice nurse for my late Uncle was from South America and she and I were by his side. When he passed, she opened all the windows to allow his soul to release.
It’s an old nurses ritual x
Deleteboth 3pm and am are "thin" times..
ReplyDeleteyou are doing well just being there xx
I hate waking at three . ‘ just before dawn when most Fallorn”
DeleteI have a vague memory it is 3PM when Christ died, making 3AM the antithesis time, a time for dark doings and devilish shenanigans.
ReplyDeleteThe patient is lucky to have you. I can think of no better thing to someone nearby when sick.
Beware those Spiders, there may be some nasty ones amongst them. When I was a boy there was a Fyffe's (sp?) Banana ripening warehouse on the edge of the village, and the greengrocer used to exhibit some of the more 'exotic stowaways' in his window. Some of them were HUGE!
ReplyDelete