How time flies
Last night I watched Notting Hill a film that reminds me of an unhealthy relationship I was once in… having said this and film’s portrayal of what could be seen as an ultimately decent relationship between Anna Scott( Julia Roberts) and William Thacker ( Hugh Grant) gave me that “ arh ha!” Therapy moment I was writing about yesterday.
I went with my boyfriend to see the movie on a Friday afternoon, after which he disappeared to his second home in the Lake District, something he’d do regularly and always without me. I realised after that that I was making do with the crumbs of the relationship and that was “ok” because I didn’t deserve anything more or better.
Crazy to think that now, but back then I did , only to realise by the final credits of the movie I was worth more than that.
I broke up with him soon after.
It's a stormy day here, too, with the wind blowing a hoolie and the temperature dropping that might even bring snow this afternoon.
ReplyDeleteIt's always good when it is noticed that all someone is leaving you is crumbs because each of us always deserves the whole enchilada. Always!
Stay cozy!
Hugs!
Hoolie is a great word
DeleteWindy, wet and cold here, too. Let's hope this is the last for a long while!
ReplyDeleteRealising that you're the one putting all the effort into a relationship, with little or no input from the other person, is a real light bulb moment. Some people seem to be content to let things continue - any affection is better than none, but for most, there's got to be some equality. Give and take, not just one giving and the other taking. Everyone deserves that respect. xx
I think it’s all about self worth, if you have low self worth as I did , you put up with things
DeleteCounseling makes you very introspective, doesn't it. What applies to clients may also resound to oneself. I love a good storm if I feel safe and warm. No storm here, just gale winds and bleak drippy grey. We had two days of what in NY is called False Spring...snow later today.
ReplyDeleteI hope you continue to enjoy your winter break.
I’m recharging and am spending quality Mary time
DeleteSpend every moment you can w Mary--I lost my boy Baby Mo this week, the loss is overwhelming. [pug]
DeleteThe power of movies!
ReplyDeleteAnd a hungry self awareness
DeleteI love Rhys Ifans in that movie, and Hugh of course. But Rhys stole the scenes with his t-shirts. Crumbs don't feed us, so good you broke up with him.
ReplyDeleteRhys is from north wales he went to school with a friend of mine
DeleteJust read yesterday's post and now this. One of the gifts of getting older is coming to value ourselves. You have so much to give your clients. XO
ReplyDeleteAnd understand where we went wrong
DeleteAnd this is why I have read, and appreciated, your blog for so long. Your self awareness and bravery humbles me.
ReplyDeleteThank you for that kindness
DeleteWhen I lived in Notting Hill there were tons of tourists still coming to seek out the movie locations, ten years after it came out. Wonder if that's still the case? Bravo to you for your self-awareness. I lingered way too long in a one-sided relationship when I was young. But we do these sorts of things when we're inexperienced and in love. (Or think we're in love.)
ReplyDeleteWe do indeed, but the sad thing for some is that patterns are repeated
DeleteA powerful film can enlighten your own situation. Good thing.
ReplyDeleteHugs
DeleteI had a girlfriend like that in 1991, I thought I loved her, Jesus what a fool I was
ReplyDeleteLee
We've got a rain/snow mix with wind. It feels like Winter again, especially after a couple days of near 60 degrees F with sunshine.
ReplyDeleteJohn, you deserve only the best. Only you can ensure the best.
It was cool and breezy here too yesterday. I would have enjoyed 'Notting Hill', but I made-do with a crossword instead.
ReplyDeleteSomeday, your prince will come. Hugs,
ReplyDeleteI had no idea what it was like to have a partner who was not only able but eager to give as much as I did and often even more than I did until I met the man I'm married to today. And I had been married once before. I was so emotionally unhealthy at the time that I truly wondered if something was wrong with him.
ReplyDeleteAnd here we are, forty something years later. I still sometimes find it hard to accept that he loves me the way he does.
You are a catch they why he loves u
DeleteMy first marriage was one sided, his side, then I met someone who treated me very well. I walked away from my marriage and went to live with the person who would eventually become my husband. We were very happy together for 35 years. I learned to expect more and that I deserved more.
ReplyDeleteWe too are having windy, cold weather and are expecting snow this morning. I did a quick shop for some potatoes this morning early and will make some potato soup tomorrow for something to do. You deserve someone kind, energetic, good sense of humour and with a good job. Gigi
Nicely put Gigi
DeleteI do enjoy that film. I've been lucky in that I found someone who selflessly supported me and allowed me to be there for them for more than thirty years. It's quite jarring sometime when a piece of art or media shows you a truth about yourself or situation.
ReplyDelete