Monday, 26 October 2020

Good, Bad .......Ugly


 People are just as good and just as bad as they always been
That’s what I think, for what it’s worth
Do they complain more? 
No, I don’t think they do, they just complain differently.
The subject matters of the complaints change with priority changes 
Social media amplifies our perceptions of the complaints 
We see more
We think there is more 
We therefore feel we need to comment more.
It’s a cycle and one that is not always constructive.

This need to comment is a double edged sword.
I love comments on Going Gently but I don’t need criticism 
When I say I don’t need it...I mean it literally....I just don’t need it.
I know myself warts and all. 
Thank you very much, ta muchly....
I don’t need someone to tell me an alternative view of my psychological make up
I know the alternative view
But some  do love to be experts on absolutely everything
Even on me!

Today, no matter who you are, you have a bigger voice than people once had. 
You can say your piece to an audience of potential millions
How fantastic is that?

A bit jumbled but it’s 6.18 am, so I’m allowed…
My last night Shift is almost over . Back on day shifts on Wednesday 

My thoughts are with Weaver of Grass
I hope someone can tell us how she is doing today
Hey ho


121 comments:

  1. Absolutely right ! x

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  2. Generally I think that Knowing yourself is a useful and good thing..being comfortable with what you know is sometimes tough. Not much of a rest for you between shifts John..take care x

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    Replies
    1. yes...comfortable? just accepting xx

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  3. The world will be a better place when everyone values kindness x

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    Replies
    1. i know a person she spends her lifethinking shes kindwhen shes merely nice

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  4. Ditto, Rachel.
    Knowing yourself is power.
    Kathy xxx

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  5. I have also been thinking about Pat.....comments on her last post seem to have been removed! Hoping for some good news from someone.

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    Replies
    1. im presuming herfriend has clearedthe deckscand will post an update shortly

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  6. What is going on with Weave? Like you I am worried.

    When all is said and done I totally take the point you make about people’s opinion and them feeling free to say whatever the hell they like. All from the safety of their bomb-proof bunker. Going back to Pat, it begs the question that maybe those who blog should have someone lined up in case they can’t continue to give a last post, as it were. Hopefully this isn’t the case here.

    LX

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    Replies
    1. She’s broke her hip and is presumably having surgery

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    2. Not all of us have someone who can understand the intricacies of blogging and could do a 'last post' for us. Alan once, many years ago hijacked my blog to wish me a Happy Birthday, but even he has admitted he wouldn't know where to start to do it again.

      Some do have a person that can post or at least leave a comment ... as Pat's friend has done for us ... but I have read far too many sad posts from a partner or adult child of a blogger who has died or in two cases committed suicide.

      Delete
    3. yes facebook has somesort of policy for nominating somene to take over your account in the event of injury or whatever.
      oerhaps wecall should make sure we give our passords to a love one

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    4. That's a good idea, and perhaps an instruction of how to do a post.

      Delete
  7. There's a lot of judging that goes on in blogging - often from people who don't even have their own blogs. Like you, I often get pissed off with this tendency to judge. I am not entirely immune from it myself but for some visitors it appears to be their bread and butter. Sometimes it is good to stand back and avoid the temptation to judge, accepting other bloggers for what they are and accepting that what they write may be different from what we would write.

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    Replies
    1. i just dont need my bad points to be paraded infrontof me like it is some big lesson in life
      im 58 years old i know my bad pointsx

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    2. What bad points? I've yet to see a one. -Kate

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    3. oh there are several my love

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  8. Well said! Thanks for sharing. (You have warts?!?)

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  9. So true.
    I only wish some people would remember to be as quick to thank others or give compliments. Too quick to criticise or judge.

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  10. Another friend of mine, periodically posts on another social media channel, "be kind, the person you are talking to may be giving all they have to keep it together today." It is a good reminder. And we all have those days.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. the invisible parameters dont stop some peoplehaving the “ right” to say exactly whatthey think

      Delete
  11. Very interesting post John, agree with all of it, my Dad’s motto was If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. Mine is more bog off, leave me alone and mind your own business, I too know myself, my good points, my failings also and don’t need anyone else to be telling me. We pass this way but once and I believe in doing the best I can as I pass. Hark at me, bit deep for a wet Monday morning, had better go and wash the dishes! Brummie Sue Xx.

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    Replies
    1. hi sue
      my point is moreits not necessary
      i know my bad points xx

      Delete
  12. Oh, blogging is the original social network. And of course everybody's got an opinion. But like belly buttons, there are some I don't care about.

    XOXO

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  13. Yep, absolutely. But I do like getting comments.

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  14. Breaking a hip is not good for seniors well for that matter anyone but for the elderly even more so.

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    Replies
    1. not in thesecovid times, ourbthoughts arevwith her

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  15. Who's been calling you names again?

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    Replies
    1. No one, this week , which makes for a delightful change

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    2. Amazing how quickly you health workers can lose your hero status. People have short memories.

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    3. nobody claps me every thursday

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  16. I'm another one who is concerned about Pat (Weaver). It's rather worrying that comments have been, not only stopped, but removed from her last post. I still hope she will be back soon to assure us that she is doing OK.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. dontbworry
      ithink they have beendeleted
      to leave a clear forum for the update message

      Delete
  17. I hope weaver gets the healthcare she needs to return. nasty people should FOAD.

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    Replies
    1. im sure she is ok she has a thousand friendscand a goodfamily

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  18. What you say John is so true. I think the social media has given people the opportunity to comment and criticise negatively on so many more people than they can in real life. Also saying these sort of things would probably end up with them being injured. The bullies hide behind "anonymous". This year they all seem to have crept out of the woodwork. hugs Ro xx

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    Replies
    1. and its east to hide behind pseudonyms

      Delete
  19. I love you blog and all that you share. Agreed: Nasty, hurtful comments have no place here. The sudden silence around Weave is concerning. Hopefully she is working toward healing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i dont mind to be challenged at all
      but susan, i dint need to be told what are my weaknesses
      i already know those

      Delete
  20. We need KINDNESS. that's all. Love to you John and to Weaver.

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    Replies
    1. hopefully we will find out whats happening to her x

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  21. Heidi1:37 pm

    Oh dear, if this post is because of my comment I'm sorry. I wasn't being critical of you, that wasn't the intention. I've looked at the comment again and can't see that I've criticised you directly but due to being emotionally drained due to family stuff perhaps my view is skewed. A sad end to years of reading here but I'm not nasty, unkind or a bully as some commenters have stated and I don't need to put up with that. I've only had good wishes for you John and wish you all the best for your future. Peace and love, Bye.

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    Replies
    1. No not of your comment Heidi , rest assured

      Delete
  22. Barbara Anne1:53 pm

    As I read ages ago: "Be kind to everyone you meet because everyone is fighting some sort of battle." Wouldn't it be lovely if everyone on-line was kind, too?
    I join with those wishing for an update on Weaver and am wishing her well.
    Sleep well today, John, and enjoy your time off before your day shifts begin.

    Hugs!

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    Replies
    1. hummm no shufts for 10 days , covid contact testing hasrung i am to be isolated at home

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    2. Barbara Anne12:52 am

      Oh, NO! Did you test positive? If so, may you make strong antibodies and weather whatever symptoms develop without problems.
      At least you have a lovely home, wonderful art pieces, and a furry family to keep you company at home. Who knows? There may be gifts of food and other things appearing on the stone wall after this news gets out.

      Really BIG hugs!

      Delete
    3. Barbara Anne1:08 am

      DH just pointed out that it's possible that someone you were recently in contact with has tested positive, so you're in isolation until you do or don't show symptoms yourself.
      May the Force be with you!

      More hugs from afar!

      Delete
  23. Some people are just damn unpleasant and so best to be ignored but it is difficult.Yesterday a woman and another couple forced me out of the way to let her pass far too close which I did but then one of my dogs barked at her dog and she gave me the filthiest of looks-unfortunately for her as she hurried on she banged her head on a tree branch she didn't see as she was eyeballing me.Don't think she was bothered about social distancing at all though x

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    Replies
    1. your first sentence is unfortunately correct

      Delete
  24. You are right that people can be mean, John. Kindness is always a better choice.
    Thinking of Pat and her broken hip... When my Mom broke hers, she needed surgery and then physical therapy to help her get back on her feet. But she did get back on her feet and we called her the Bionic Woman because she did well with her recovery. Hoping for the same results for Pat. She has been determined with her "Percy" all along and that should help her now. We will all keep watching for news...

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  25. The great irony is that 'Anonymous' did a heck of a lot of whinging and complaining about you...his criticism being that YOU were whinging and complaining. Er...Pot? This is kettle...

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  26. As I have gotten older I realized that I was, or had become, pretty judgemental. I am working on that because I also realized that I have no way of knowing what burdens another person might be dealing with. It is more productive to work on ourselves than offering advice, solicited or otherwise,to others. Wonder why we shrug off compliments but allow mean things to fester in our souls?

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  27. I always feel that if I read and enjoy a blog I should participate and support the writer by commenting. This seems to be wrong tho, especially on British blogs, for some reason, where inadvertent offense may be given. I am sorry if that ever happened.

    lizzy x

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  28. Fantastic art today. I don't mind a constructively critical comment, but I don't need one that's just empty criticism.

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    Replies
    1. Oh, and now I see what prompted this. Anonymous commenters are just cowards anyway.

      Delete
    2. they are irritating ....you nailedit steve with “ empty”

      Delete
  29. Anonymous5:10 pm

    Those criticizing others would do well to remember what goes around comes around. You,good man, are far more often praised than insulted, for a good reason. -Mary

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    Replies
    1. its nice to have positives too, but strange as it may seem to some, im not touting for positives

      Delete
  30. I agree! It is nice to get comments. It is nice to be able to have an outlet to discuss our lives but if they don't like what they read then don't read. A comment isn't going to fix my issues. Maybe I don't want them fixed.

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    Replies
    1. exactly or maybe if u do, u will ask

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  31. That artwork would look nice in the new bathroom.

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    Replies
    1. hes a lovely hunk of spunk

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    2. Is he Your new fancy man John?-he looks delish x

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  32. I think commenters to make personal criticisms of a blog's writer reveal more about themselves than the person they write about and such comments should just be ignored.

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    Replies
    1. agree with the first half of your statement xx

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  33. Well said John. We each know ourselves and it is our right to only show others whatever part of us we choose.

    Congratulations on your last night Shift!

    I have been quite worried about Pat too. I hope we hear something soon.

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    Replies
    1. me too.....
      covid in hospitals and all

      Delete
  34. Some commenters on some social media platforms seem to say things that they would never say to your face.
    Not always bad things, but too often that way.

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    Replies
    1. yes bring iton to my face , hothing would be said again x

      Delete
  35. Anonymous8:51 pm

    the second wave is starting and in a pandemic it is usually the 2nd wave that kills the majority of people. You baby boomers are all going to die of corona-virus and finally the world will be able to make progress when you boomers are all dead

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well yes, we're all going to die eventually... and your point is?

      Delete
    2. You guys know this is spam, right?

      Delete
  36. Oh *that* doofus again!

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  37. I've just heard that Weaver has had her operation and is doing well. She hopes to be home soon. No hospital visiting allowed so no-one has been able to visit. I'm sure she will be back online as soon as she's home.
    Keep safe everyone.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh thank you so much for your update! What good news!

      Delete
    2. Barbara Anne12:57 am

      GillyK, thanks so much for giving us news of dear Weaver. Hips do need to be fixed quickly (I'm a former operating room nurse) so knew she would have surgery as soon as possible. Won't she go to rehab before returning home?

      Hugs!

      Delete
    3. Thanks for the update on Weaver. I have been worrying.

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    4. I've been wondering how Pat is-sending her love and good wishes xx

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    5. So pleased to hear good the news about Pat, thank you for letting us know. I have been thinking of her all day.
      Sending my best wishes for her recovery.
      Pam in Texas.x

      Delete
    6. Anonymous4:50 am

      Thank you so much for the good news!
      Hilde in Germany

      Delete
    7. Anonymous7:49 am

      Thanks ever so much for the news about her!-Mary

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    8. Thank you for the update - hope she will be home soon.

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    9. Thank you GillyK for the update on Weaver, I have been concerned about her, I hope she can return home soon. Good to know she had her operation and is doing well.

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    10. Thank you for the update. Lots of us are wishing Pat well. Xx

      Delete
  38. All cruel people describe themselves as paragons of frankness.

    --Tennessee Williams

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    Replies
    1. This was apt. One of the most hurtfully opinionated people I ever met always followed up her cruel assessments with "At least I'm being honest!" I never bothered to engage with her, because that's what she wanted me to do, but every single time she proclaimed it, that voice in my head said, "You're not honest - you're a bitch."

      Delete
  39. I was hoping for news of Weaver too John. Let's hope we soon hear she is on the mend.

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  40. I treasure the opinion of others. They are doors to new conversations. But people who don't know you? They should not be messing in your pool. Nice post. Get some rest.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Well said

    Thank you Gilly.

    ReplyDelete
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