Sharing A Bed

I was going to start by saying I miss sharing my bed.
I miss sharing my bed with another man
The alternative to many is a very attractive one.
Cool, crisp white linen sheets
A warm duvet
Pillows soft and easily moulded
Silence
The double bed all to yourself
The ability to do " snow angels " uninterrupted on the bottom sheet
Long, undisturbed slumber
Bliss

Without a naked man in my bed do I tick all of those wonderful singleton boxes?
Do I fucking hell as like?!

Yesterday I got into bed at 10.30 am  The sheets were fresh, the duvet wrinkle free and the pillows plumped
Then like the children out of The Sound Of Music did to Maria when the thunderstorm started , the dogs start to appear.
Dotty and Mary are always first
Each battling for the armpit position.
Mary tends to win because I allow her first dibs
With a mini flounce that would but Vivian Leigh to shame, Dorothy collapses next to her.
She snores loudly in protest of not being closest .
Then Winnie appears and we have the "wandering around on the wooden floor ten minutes" torture until she is ready to haul her great carcass onto the bed.
One on the bed she immediately collapses with a loud fart, snort, or groan
She too then stats to snore.
Albert is always last.
He chooses last as there is less chance of his receiving a rather unwelcomed and rather shocking arse lick.....
He curls up anywhere he can fit.
There isn't any space for bleeding Tatoo from Fantasy Island to squeeze a buttock next to mine, let alone the prospect of any hairy arsed potential boyfriend to manage to creep under my duvet with lascivious intent!
Perhaps Im destined to be single