Saturday, 10 August 2019

Old

I didn't get so much of a Good Luck from lead nurse of duty yesterday
Instead she left me a scribbled note
" FYI could you complete your careplans they are overdue"
I wrote on the corner her note
" FYA careplans already completed" xxxxx
We got up three of my favourite patients before heading for home and I told the, truthfully that I would miss them. Cynthia and Betty ,The two ladies cried a bit as I kissed them goodbye and as I shook Glyn hand firmly he thanked me for my time, in that way men do when they don't want to be emotional
I might not have got on with the lead nurse , but the standard of care was good.
So I wasn't leaving them without an advocate, or in a bad environment .
Older people are so vulnerable.
Im not going to get old
I decided that a long time ago

 

95 comments:

  1. Getting old doesn't bother me, but becoming frail does, because as you rightly point out older people are so vulnerable, in so many ways. I've always said that I don't especially want a long life, but I want a healthy one.
    Last shift done and dusted, it's onwards and upwards from now for you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't want to depend on people who don't really want to tolerate being depended upon

      Delete
  2. Good luck with all the new beginnings, you'll be forever young, as long as that's what you decide.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Professional to the last. Well done for not stooping to her level. The rest of your life starts now xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did consider leaving a turd on her desk

      Delete
  4. Well done, you could have said f*** off but you were better than her. Never say never but stay fit and healthy. I've been trying to get my mum moving more, mobility is everything in old age! Wishing you a much happier new job. x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We had no relationship. I had no expectation that she would be even polite

      Delete
  5. In work not all people gel together. It helps if they do but sometimes it doesn't happen. At least she left a note reminding you about something at work which you had already done so nothing to worry about. Could have been worse. Same as life, you are not going to gel with everybody you meet. Even your soon to be ex husband didn't work out. Not all people are going to fall all over you with passion. It is the way of things. You could find someone at the hospice who finds you difficult to work with. We don't know from the blog. You could irritate the socks off us.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous9:43 am

      Could we move on from bringing up the fact that John's marriage didn't work out? I'm sure John is well aware of this! Today is the start of a fresh chapter in his life, he doesn't need dragging down by his friends.

      Pauline B

      Delete
    2. You'll never be able to identify the point at which you grow old and have lost any use to anybody and you'll be blogging to 3 people who'll agree that it's ok that you're eating your meal out of a dog bowl on the floor and writing the opening speech to the vegetable show although it is now held in animation and doesn't involve humans or real vegetables but hey ho no need for you to know.

      Delete
    3. I wasn't complaining about the note merely commentating on it.
      It's tone didn't surprise me.
      I've always liked the analogy
      "Getting on with work people is like standing at a bus stop with 12 other people.....you like one, tolerate most, dislike one other"


      Rachel I've been working in large teams since I was 20

      Delete
    4. I know how they work

      Delete
  6. You are not going to grow old? Well you had better get yourself to a cryogenic facility pretty damned quick then. I believe there's one in Rhyl called "The Ice Man Cometh" after a play by Eugene O'Neill.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like many older people do
      The suicide rate over 65 is incredibly high

      Delete
  7. I am not going to get old either. There is a cure for that.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Good luck in your new life. Seems to be the year for change for so many of us. Xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. People going out of our lives for whatever reason, house moves, job moves etc. In my own small turning of eight house each one has had a monumental change in the past year.

      Delete
  9. Old with dignity is fine John. I left my last NHS nursing job at 57 a few months ago. The care and patients were great but unfortunately wherever you go you always find one or two staff members who can make going into work a dread. When I was younger I had to put up with it but one reaches an age when you decide that you can no longer put up with it and that there's more to life. The finances have taken a hit but I'm glad I left.Having a job you don't enjoy doesn't do one's mental health much good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes...sometime in life you have to come first

      Delete
  10. I shall fight old age all the way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. To me that's the right attitude.

      Delete
    2. Sarah Jones7:15 pm

      I love your attitude to life Ilona x

      Delete
  11. You and me both, kid!

    LX

    ReplyDelete
  12. How would you go about it, John? And how can you be sure you won't miss the vital moment when you are still master of your own destiny? I suppose - you being a nurse - you have more discrete methods at your disposal than a rope and the next tree or, with a few stones in your coat pockets, wading into the nearest river. I have asked my son, should I lose my marbles, to take me for a long walk along some coastal path. All my life I have been known for "falling" (even UP the stairs) so, should I "accidentally" fall off the cliff, no suggestion of helping me along can be put onto him. An idea which was met with an eye roll, a shake of his head and silence. It's all very well now when old age still seems a long way off, but the thought of ever, possibly, hindering and hampering my son's enjoyment of life really does bother me. Anyway, as you reminded me the other day, this post is NOT about me - though hope that you appreciate that all I can do is contribute my own thoughts and, sometimes, life's experiences.

    Other than that happy you closed that job's worth door behind you - and hope that all staff relations in your new job will be smooth ones. As Rachel says, unfortunately not all people gel. Which, in a professional setting, shouldn't matter but for some it does.

    Happy old endings, happy new beginnings,John,
    U

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous2:27 pm

      Given that you have just told the world your plan for your own demise, it wouldn't be seen as an accident, would it? It would just incriminate your son. How sad.

      Delete
    2. Come on, Anon. Please do crank up the old humo(u)r. Would I ever do that to anyone? Least my son? If, when the time comes, I can still walk that Coastal Path (though personally prefer drowning rather than breaking my neck) I'll do so all by myself.

      U

      Delete
    3. I'm sure you could find a volunteer

      Delete
    4. Most people just get on with things
      The human spirit, the ability to just live at all cost, the innate need to keep going
      I have seen that all throughout my career

      I know what I don't want.
      Who knows if I could take charge of my own destiny?
      We only know nearer the time.
      But I have seen the other side of existing, through chronic pain, disability, menatal instabiliy
      I know what I don't want

      Delete
    5. Mave! You do make a girl titter

      Delete
    6. You are unlikely to know.

      Delete
  13. Anonymous10:26 am

    Getting old is difficult. Just got to roll with it. Good luck with your new job. Hope there are like minded people for you to make new friends with.
    xx Cali G

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like I said
      I will like a couple, adore one other, feel ambivalent about most
      And hate at least. One

      Delete
  14. "FYI" is illiterate in this context. If I were the sort of person who said, "That tells me all I need to know," I'd probably say it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Agreed. He could have said, "FYI I have already done them", or just 'FY' for Fuck You.

      Delete
    2. She was never ever going to be my friend
      And that was mighty fine with me

      Delete
  15. Here's to new beginnings.
    Old doesn't bother me. Increasingly frail does. A lot.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think you have hit the nail on the head here

      Delete
  16. Joan (Devon)10:50 am

    Stay forever young John! I know from experience that old age with medical conditions sucks (not a word I would normally use, but it suits how I feel at the moment).

    I expect you felt some relief when you walked through that door for the last time. Here's to going forward to your new working life.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There was a certain " thank fuck for that" feeling

      Delete
  17. It's fine to grow old, but let's all do it disgracefully!
    Onward and upward now John, a whole fresh start. X

    ReplyDelete
  18. Next....................

    ReplyDelete
  19. I met a ninety-two-year-old lady the other day, on her way back from the take-away. She had bought herself a curry for her lunch. Now that is the sort of old age I wish to aspire to. I wish you every happiness in your new job, John (and no snotty lead nurses). x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There are always snotty nurses around, I was probably one myself a long time ago!

      Delete
  20. Wow, that was some farewell note!

    My body is letting me down now and I don't like it.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I've lived too long to die young and leave a beautiful corpse. One of my favorite quotes:
    “Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”
    Quote by Hunter S. Thompson

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous3:05 pm

      Love this quote!
      Cali G

      Delete
    2. Yes David, I know this quote well

      Delete
  22. If lucky, one will eventually get old on the outside, but can stay young inside. It does help if you break all the mirrors.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I suspect age is quite OK as long as you are still healthy and active and have some friends still around. Do NOT go gently!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Barbara Anne1:45 pm

    How joyous it is that the night job is over and done with, careplans completed, and you're back home to sleep. Hug yourself - it's really over. Sweet!

    I'm right there with Diana Trent (Waiting for God) in being feisty to the end. That's the plan at least. :)

    Hugs from afar

    ReplyDelete
  25. Lots of ideas and thoughts here - both good and bad - when dealing with aging and death! I particularly like "breaking all the mirrors", "picking up a take-away meal at age 92", "mobility is everything" and "the coastal cliff walk"!!!
    Meanwhile I plan to take each day in stride while I can, yes "mobility really IS is everything" - and here's wishing you the best as you go to your new job John. They will be fortunate to have you.

    ReplyDelete
  26. The problem isn't getting old, it's our society not looking after the elderly properly and trying to pretend they don't exist at all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And also pretending we can't afford them
      We HAVE TO afford them

      Delete
  27. Onward. You will be a most valuable and honored member of the team at hospice. I know it.

    ReplyDelete
  28. You had a good farewell from those who really matter.
    Growing old..we do it as soon as we start off. Just do it positively, concentrating on Can Do. That's all we are able xx

    ReplyDelete
  29. I had to look up what FYA meant, much nicer than what wandered through my head.

    Glad you got to say goodbye to your patients.

    ReplyDelete
  30. A toast to new beginnings John.

    ReplyDelete
  31. One more loose end tied up with a bow. I can imagine how your patients felt, having seen a few really good caregivers come and go quickly at my father's nursing home. I always wished the best ones would stay, and I hope if I ever need care I will have at least one good one to look forward to each day.

    ReplyDelete
  32. I know that feeling of relief when you walk out of a stressful job for the last time, headed to a better opportunity. Good for you! Onward and upward!

    ReplyDelete
  33. Want to stay young forever? Get a blue-collar job. Factories or warehouses won't let you grow old.

    But seriously, I want to stay young long enough so that the mistakes of the past pale before all the things I get right in the future. Fat chance.

    Then there's relationships. Most of mine have been May-December with me the May. In retrospect I loved that, probably because I enjoy being seduced and, for me at least, that was more likely as a May in May-December than in May-May, and (probably) December-December.

    Suicide? I have no moral qualms about it (it's how Hunter Thompson went, incidentally) but am probably too chicken to ever do it. Though I used to be afraid of it, I'm beginning to think Alzheimer's is not such a bad thing. That way, you don't KNOW what's going on with your body.


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But the one who is stuck to take care of you is well aware. I know. I am there. Not fair at all.

      Delete
    2. Not fair allround me thinks

      Delete
  34. FYI..... I am so out of here.....

    So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, Good night !

    ReplyDelete
  35. Sarah Jones7:21 pm

    Good luck in your new job John. A new chapter awaits xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeap new and hopefullya great deal better

      Delete
  36. Hi hun, You will grow to be old - but in your own home with a loved significant other.He will laugh as you bend over and f*rt and watch as you spill egg yolk down your face from a beautifully cooked scotch egg. You will both reminiss how things were better in the 80's and laugh at the yougsters of the day. He will enclose you with his love as you both count your grey hairs and wrinkles. *hugs* Goldensunflowerx

    ReplyDelete
  37. *youngsters not yougsters LOL !!! xxx

    ReplyDelete
  38. Some team leaders are no leaders at all, it makes me wonder how they ever got the jobs in the first place. Best wishes to you for the new job. May it bring the satisfaction of good work well done.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Sounds like a good goodbye.
    Me, I have a lot of practice at getting old and wearing out this last two months.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Good luck John for your new job

    ReplyDelete
  41. I dont I tend to have an unpleasant, painfilled, prolonged, lingering last existence.
    We don't do that to our beloved animals, why should we have to suffer it?
    Just my opinion though
    Glad you finished your final shift there John. Onwards and upwards!

    ReplyDelete
  42. Very well handled John, my parting messages have tend to be burning my bridges types of ones.... I can never just seem to button it. Oh well, at least they know where they stand with me.

    Good luck in the new job!

    Jo in Auckland

    ReplyDelete
  43. I have mixed feelings about my own aging. Hope I'm lucky enough to have all my faculties and basic good health for a long time to come. And, when I go, make it quick, please! As for that head nurse, what a twit. So glad you're onward to something better! Congratulations!

    ReplyDelete

I love all comments Except abusive ones from arseholes