Single Walking

I was tempted to leave yesterday's post as it is, uncluttered by the thoughts from today.
I can't tell you how moved I was, surrounded by the snippets of the personal- names and locations of the great and the good and it's wonderful to think that several hundred of us pop back and forth in order to share the thoughts of someone we are never destined to meet.

Mary and I had our lunch on Colwyn Bay beach again this afternoon. We shared a ham baguette from Bryn Williams 'and she shared a water bowl of a large hot black Labrador who we passed lying under the shade of his owner's 4x4.
We walked the length of the promenade and back.
I always think that I look safer walking a dog. I have the rather odd impression that people think a single middle aged man walking alone is someone to be suspicious of in some way which I know is a discourtesy to single middle aged men everywhere.
I think a jaunty Mary offset my jaunty second best Walking Dead T shirt today and
It amused me that when we stopped for coffee at one of the promenade cafes a large biker type called out a lusty " Daryl Dixon is the best" as a passed by him and gave me a high five.
Mary woofed at him as he did so.


57 comments:

  1. Not a lot of people on the beach there John but the weather looks good. Like the sound of that baguette too - not sure I would have shared it with Tess - I am too greedy.

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    1. I caught it at a quiet moment further along the beach was packed

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  2. Everybody needs a canine companion. I don’t know about... to look safer... more sane definitely.

    I worry about you worrying about how you present to the world John. You are one of the world’s best men, know it, live it, breathe it, walk it. Yesterday’s comments show how the blogging world views you. So walk tall, be proud with dog or without, we all love you. Sorry if this sounds trite, it’s coming from the heart, so best you start believing it!

    LX

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  3. I like Mary's woof of agreement

    cheers, parsnip

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  4. John, I know exactly what you mean. I used to carry a copy of Collins handbook of fungi and hung binoculars around my neck when my children got fed up of coming for walks with me as a protective facade. It much more relaxing now I’ve got a dog.

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    1. Yes accessories ( including a dog) camouflage a man

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  5. I would love to have access to a promenade café. How civilized it is to be sitting outside with your coffee and your best-four-legged friends.

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  6. I'd trust you with or without the dog.

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  7. Because I walk in solitude everywhere, I always feel like I've somehow got to signal as I pass them, that I have absolutely NO interest in children of any age or either sex. Crazy, I know, but that's what it's come to. It's only since about the mid-90s that I've been conscious of doing this, so keen not to be thought of by anyone as being a dirty old man or specifically (and far worse) a paedo!

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    1. I knew you would understand

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    2. My spousal unit is the same way. He walks with dog, people smile and chat. He goes alone and he's ignored or avoided.

      Dogs are a great icebreaker.

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    3. If I gave kids the open and generous smile which I reserve for all and any passing dogs (with their owners) I'd be locked up!

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  8. Not many folk on Colwyn Bay beach today. Had an air raid siren just gone off? Perhaps the bank holiday day trippers had all chosen the sophisticated attractions of Rhyl instead!!!!!

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    1. It's an odd picture as it was very busy. I just snapped. At a quiet moment

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  9. What a lovely day to walk! On one hand, I can't imagine you having to consider how you present in public, but on the other as a woman of color, I very much understand! I always remember what my eldest son once said, "It ain't us, ma, it's them!" We're never the problem, sweetpea. xoxo/Sharifa

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  10. I understand your feeling of walking alone but for different reasons that I'm not quite sure of myself. I walk alone a lot mainly for exercise but I often feel a little uneasy almost like I need a dog as an excuse to walk. How crazy is that?

    I loved your post yesterday. How fun it was to see the locations of all your readers. And you got well over 300 comments! Congratulations!

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    1. It was fun was it not and people are still commentating

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  11. Thank you, John, for casting us all as the great and good yesterday. I wonder why the world so suspects motives that we walk with dog and book. Well, end of today's introspection. Have a great week.

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  12. I walk alone frequently, in fact almost always, and no dog. I suppose what you've never had you never miss. I don't feel odd or that people are looking at me. In fact I have never thought about it. I am also happy stopping in cafés alone and have never carried a book. In fact I usually end up in conversation with someone. I always think people who sit reading a book alone in a café are sending out a message that they don't want to speak so I never try to engage with them and leave them undisturbed.

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    1. I think lone men are often viewed with suspicion rachel
      Especially by women

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    2. If it is in your mind then you will imagine it I suppose.

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    3. Many men feel the same rachel

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    4. My husband says the same. And like someone said up thread, it's got worse since the 90s

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    5. This seems on my mind a lot of late. Last week, in Colorado, two teenagers pooled their funds and drove the family van from New Mexico to attend a standard college campus tour of the U of Colorado. A white mother on the tour "felt uncomfortable" with two native sons there, called the police and the boys were pulled from a tour they were invited to attend. We grow less civilized by the week.The discouragement weighs heavily. Again, thanks for treating us well.

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  13. If I didn't have a canine companion, or two, I would just be a middle aged woman walking along the prom talking to herself. I'd most likely be carted away pretty sharpish ... thank goodness for dogs :-)

    I love the quiet end of Colwyn Bay prom, when the tide is out, the other end is always packed with families.

    Unfortunately it's not long now until the dogs have to vacate most of the beaches for the Summer. I understand the reasoning but the dogs miss the sand :-(

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    1. The older we get the more invisible we become

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  14. I walk alone but with great purpose and I carry a lovely light but sturdy walking stick my husband made me. Of course, I am an oldish woman so no one perceives me as a threat but there have been times I have felt a bit threatened. Very rarely. Mostly I walk where there are few, if any, people. It is peaceful and today I saw a beautiful doe jump a fence and a puppy played at running from me back to his house. I did cross paths with one man who was also walking and he stopped to talk and I felt most impatient. GET ON WITH IT! I wanted to say. I have many miles to go! Eventually, he finished with what he was saying and I was vastly relieved but resented the intrusion into my own time. But to your point- I cannot imagine anyone seeing you as a threat. Your eyes are so very, very kind. They tell the story of your soul.

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    1. I think I don't feel comfortable if others feelincomfortable.

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  15. It's a bit like eating alone in a restaurant isn't it? You just want to be left alone to enjoy the moment.

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  16. I tried to post a comment yesterday with no success x

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    1. I think it did...to see extra comments you have to click on a link below the comment box

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  17. I guess the biker also has the hots for Daryl Dixon.

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    1. He was dressed liked him so there was a fair chance

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  18. I wonder if yesterdays number of comments is some sort of record and ought to be entered in The Guinness book of Records, for even more fame and fortune!

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  19. As long as you're not wearing a raincoat on a sunny day I think you'll pass muster John.

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  20. I know exactly what you mean, and it's not limited to men although the world at large may find a lone man more threatening. I am always careful not to engage with children unless they speak first. It's the same feeling I've always had in shops; I try to stand back from displays, especially of small items, so shopkeepers don't have to worry that I am going to take something. Silly, maybe. But I don't want to be accused. It would be unbearable.

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  21. Damn. I miss-read the title as, 'Single Wanking'. Imagine my disappointment.

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    1. I'm too old for all that ...almost

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    2. Not too old for single wanking, but maybe getting too old for the multiple version. A candle-lit dinner for one awaits.

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  22. My natural expression is "Guilty". I constantly feel the need to explain what I'm doing, Why I'm there and probably why I exist! I feel your pain x

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    1. I think it's a man thing.. many men I know feel uncomfortable walking behind a woman on her own

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  23. I think your post from yesterday sparked a dream last night that you held 'open house' for all your followers. We turned up. I sat with Mary for a while and admired your window treatment!

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  24. Walking alone is fraught with dangers for either sex. Isn't it interesting how a dog can change the dynamic. A dog for protection, a dog to give the impression of harmlessness?

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    1. The type of dog of dog makes a difference too... so when I walk all of the dogs the fact I call out " she's a friendly OLD bulldog" changes the dynamic drastically

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  25. I talk to everyone when I'm out with my dogs whether they like it or not x

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  26. Unfortunately I think you're right that a man with a dog now looks more "okay" than a man on his own, such is the moral panic over paedophilia and child abuse. A sorry state of affairs.

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  27. It's the world we live in nowadays. Way to go Mary :-)

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  28. Moving my post to here! Wellington New Zealand. xo

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