I know most of us don't embark on what can be helpfully described as " Making A Scene " on a regular basis but, I am sure, we have all had our moments when the wind was in the right direction and nerves may have been pushed way past " twanging point" so to speak!
Flare ups, especially if they occur in a rather nice restaurant, can be satisfyingly entertaining, especially if you are the observer and not the participant !
Last night, The Prof and I enjoyed a very nice meal in a rather expensive eating house. It was as trendy as it was slick and as a particularly well dressed woman sashayed past our table, the whole place reminded me of a rather nice restaurant in Amsterdam where I was dreadfully humiliated by a previous boyfriend. Now this was many, many moons ago now, but I do remember that the restaurant suddenly went very quiet after my dinner companion hissed a rather aggressive rebuke at me over the perfect table settings and I sat there with my head bowed, red faced and seemingly helpless.
But I wasn't helpless. For slowly I put my napkin down and very deliberately stood up and walked out of the restaurant. I was so slow that the maitre d' had just enough time to pick my coat up and pass it to me as I passed ( a classy moment which made up for my blushes)
It wasn't the end of that relationship, but it was one of just the few reasons it did end!
Thank God!
Have you ever had a scene in a restaurant ?
I'd be interested to know.
Tom Stevenson' post on Melania Trump sparked this post too! " that" video seems rather revealing!
ReplyDeleteNo, but Shawn did on our first date. Ask her. Also, It's StePHenson.
Deleteseveral with the ex-husband control freak.
ReplyDeleteyou were wise to dump that ignorant SOB and hook up with the prof!
I have never made a scene anywhere John. I had ofen wanted to but have never dared.
ReplyDeleteNot a scene maker here. You did good.
ReplyDeleteNot a scene maker, and I seem to take on other peoples' emotions, so watching someone else's scene makes me very uncomfortable. That one incident has obviously stuck with you. -Jenn
ReplyDeleteOh yes. I blame it on the fact that I had a months-old infant who never slept and two pre-teens and a husband who worked 12 hours a day.
ReplyDeleteLuckily we are still married and those times are far behind us.
I have been known to make an occasional scene in public. Thankfully, quite rare. And of course, I am always in the right!
ReplyDeleteWise man you are . . .
ReplyDeleteOne rebuke would have led to others.
I recall a restaurant happening "many moons ago" when my late husband and I were out for an anniversary dinner at an exceptionally nice restaurant. We were seated . . . and given a polite, "we will be with you shortly. " We waited, waited, watched, waited . . . we stood up and calmly left after one hour. Neither of us said a word as the waiter rushed after us.
Actually, I did something very similar.
ReplyDeleteBeing reprimanded by a man who was a little overwhelmed with his wonderfulness ... the waiter gave me a sympathetic look, which is what broke this camels back.
I stood up, he said, too loudly, where are you going ?
And I just took my purse and walked out. Called a friend to pick me up and never saw him again.
I only remember how hard my heart was pounding .. how dry my mouth was ... how frightened I was .
I was too young for him. He was too old for me.
I wonder if anyone thought you were going to jump into a canal!
ReplyDeleteYes. I hate complaining but once in a steakhouse in Stirling, Scotland I complained about the awful service. The waitress and lead waiter did not take my polite complaint seriously so I got mad and exploded at them. Two other diners near to us chipped in with remarks that made me even madder and I yelled at then to keep their Scottish gobs shut as my legitimate complaint had absolutely nothing to do with them. I get all shaky when this kind of thing happens - with adrenalin coursing through my veins.
ReplyDeleteWhat a triumphant moment for you, John. Glad you ended that relationship. xx
ReplyDeleteGood for you! I've never had a scene in a restaurant. A hushed argument once or twice and I was really tempted to make a grand exit, but I never did.
ReplyDeleteI walked out on a former friend who decided we needed to talk about our friendship. The cafe was owned by another friend so I went to pay for my coffee later !
ReplyDeleteNo comment.
ReplyDeleteI have no problem creating a scene but I do need to be pushed to breaking point, I don't do it just for the drama.
ReplyDeleteI once shouted 'Get your hands off my tits' and threw a pint of beer over the man concerned, in a pub.
I was in a café once when a girl I was at school with arrived, she sat and whispered to her boyfriend for 20 minutes, it was obvious from their glances that she was talking about me (I was expelled from school for smoking, I don't smoke and never have). When I got up to leave the café I turned and announced to the café at large. 'I'm so glad I was here today Jean otherwise you and your date would have had nothing to talk about'.
Way to go Hester
DeleteLove it Hester. You told them.
DeleteNo but i did leave a man standing on the dance floor alone... And i was taught at a young age to never do that. I was in the military , going thru training and at a point in my training where we had some time off on the weekends. There was a club on base that alot of us went to. I was asked to dance by a handsome black young man with startling blue eyes and i regretted it the moment i stepped on the dance floor... Now i'll be the first to admit that up until that point i had lived a pretty sheltered life... I was maybe a year out of highschool and i had not gone to any school dances... not my thing... Honestly it was probably one of the few times i had ever been asked to dance ...I was not prepared for him to dance 'ON' me...literally rubbing his body all over mine , hands everywhere... I quickly became very uncomfortable and embarrassed . So i made the decision to push him away and leave him standing on the dance floor.. I did not look back so i have no idea if he was laughing or nonplussed and at that point didn't care.....But thats as far as i have gone to 'make a scene' lol Hugs! deb
ReplyDeleteDirty beast
DeleteIs there a grainy You Tube video?
DeleteNo restaurant scenes.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I had a beauty
in a Wal-Mart a couple
days ago.
OMG, the idiots employed there !
No I am a wimp. Hate confrontation.
ReplyDeleteI'm far too English for making scenes.
ReplyDeleteYou've caused a few!
DeleteReally?
DeleteKeep em coming off to work!
ReplyDeleteI've never been the recipient or the scene stealer, but I was with some relatives in a rather chi chi eatery when one of the elders (male) grabbed the server by the behind. She giggled and walked away rather red faced. I wanted to hide under the table.
ReplyDeleteI am not a scene-maker, but I have said a few words a few times that made me uncomfortable but had to be said. Some of those times were to question staff actions at my father's nursing home on behalf of both my father and other residents, and once at the hospital to try to have visitation rules enforced by a nurse (sorry, John!) in emerg, who refused to do so; I turned my back on her after that and refused to talk to her further. My father was very ill and hadn't been able to sleep for several days, and had finally dropped off - just as the fellow in the next bed decided to entertain half a dozen noisy folks in a 2-visitor area. Ah well. It seems I won't stick up for myself but seeing someone else in trouble drives me over the edge.
ReplyDeleteSorry about your moment of humiliation. I never had a scene with an adult at a restaurant BUT when my children were small we would often go out to eat. If they were acting up, I would warn them that if they do not behave we will go home. Next warning, "Children, what did I say?" If they started to act up again, I would stand up and tell them we were leaving, even if the food just got there. Of course, they would whine and object but as we headed out the door I would just remind them that it was the consequences of their choices and actions. p.s. They are quite responsible adults now and their children are very well behaved also!
ReplyDeleteHubby and I took the children out to a rather nice restaurant in our area when in the middle of the meal two men came to blows over a woman. She seemed to be flirting with a man at a different table and not her date. General alarm was raised throughout the entire restaurant and half the men in the place stood up to end it(or to join in)When the poor maitre d' stepped in to break it up, he was punched squarely in the jaw! Very exciting! The offending parties left the building and we all carried on with out meals, but now we all had something exciting to talk about. I have, myself, felt overwhelmed with emotion several times in a public space. I always just get up and storm out rather abruptly.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteWe had moved from D.C. to Pittsburgh, very much against my wishes, and ex had no job so I had to get one. I went for an interview at a city centre law firm, all skinny birds in "power suits and high heels" and talking hush, hush, I hated the place instantly. HE (the almighty one) said good morning and then continued to wander around chatting and basically not doing anything. I was first called in for an interview with his P.A. who looked me up and down (snotty bitch) and said my attire was "acceptable" (I wore a rather nice woollen suit as I was not wearing the "power suit" for anyone). Then she glanced at my paperwork and said "I see you have a child - please sign this form". It stated that I would take no time off whatsoever in connection with that child!!!!! Then to add to their generosity there would be no leave the first year, one week the second year and thereafter (and forever more) two weeks annual leave! WTF!!!! Anyway, HE was still wandering around chatting aimiably (sp?), i.e. NOT with a client, and he kept me waiting nearly an hour past my interview time! WHAT you expect me to wait on top of those incredibly generous working conditions??? So I just got up, picked my coat up and walked out. The P.A. came running after me and said that GOD (i.e. HE) would see me now. I just said, "I don't think so but thanks"! So a week later she called me to see if I wanted to come in for an interview, I said "again, no thanks". And then three months later she called me as she had left that company and was setting up a temping agency and did I want to join? I was in the middle of packing up as we were moving back to Switzerland so I told her again no thanks. Boy it felt good. The stupid thing is, I'm not some high-powered attorney, I was applying for a secretarial position (where the pay was crap and working conditions even crapper). Tee hee! Anna
ReplyDeleteI haven't created a scene, but have been the witness to more than one.
ReplyDeleteMy alcoholic mother drank her dinner (after drinking breakfast and lunch) abused the staff in the restaurant, and headed for the bathroom. Where she passed out under the hand basin.
I apologised profusely, paid the bill, collected (with difficulty) my mother and have never been back.
Not my scene but I feel the shame.
Oh honey, so many children of alcoholics have stories like that . My mom was the oldest of 4 children and her father was an abusive insane alcoholic.
DeleteHe threw my grandmother and the children out of the house once, then passed out. It was cold.
My mom said she felt that being the eldest, it was her duty to do the Hard Stuff.
So she broke a window, climbed in praying he was still asleep and got the keys for her mama ... who promptly drove day and night until she was far enough and safe enough to stop.
Those children never saw that man again but funny thing, they all look just like him. He was quite handsome .. rotten to the core but goodlookin'.
Thank you.
DeleteLoads of times, I'm a lairy bitch and I don't take shit. Hey ho. X
ReplyDeleteI'm definitely not a scene maker, nor is my husband, so no interesting stories here, I"m afraid. I was impressed by your 'scene with dignity' John, and so glad you have found a more congenial life-partner!
ReplyDeleteOne scene I do remember, from my childhood, is my father tasting a very expensive (the only kind he drank!) bottle of wine at a restaurant and saying "It's corked!" The manager was called, agreed, sent for a second bottle, which was likewise rejected, and a third! At which point I stopped concentrating. A few days later the manager called to explain that a waiter who had been sacked some time previously had wrecked revenge in the cellars by upending all the best wines! All ruined!
I ripped into a pharmacy assistant a few months ago for complaining about my dog's name. This was my second trip to pick up his antibiotic, and I was sick as well so not in a good mood. She said his name was too confusing and I shouldn't have chosen it. she's not working there anymore.
ReplyDeleteLisa, I think I might have bitten her myself .
DeleteSad to hear you had a bad time in Amsterdam. Do you want to come back and take the Prof? We'll give you some pointers for easy-going good food places.
ReplyDeleteNever in a restaurant, unless you count the time I out pouted a Matre'D in Paris and got seated without reservations. I have thrown memorable fits in stores a couple of times over poor service. I had a co-worker in Florida who went to dinner with her husband and another couple and her husband served her with divorce papers over dinner, she overturned the table and left in his Mercedes.
ReplyDeleteThere was a time when I needed to talk to my husband about something important and I knew that if I tried to have the conversation at home he would just ignore me so I arranged to have our four children baby sat and took him to a restaurant, hoping to have a difficult conversation over lunch in a place where he was obliged to stay put. It was a bad idea. He was mad about being ambushed and I started crying, then he was mad about me crying. I think we left before we even ordered anything.
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't a big scene but still excruciating. Picking the kids up after no time at all was also excruciating
Embarrassing, yes...my first husband & I were dining in a nice restaurant with another couple when my spouse suddenly threw up all over the table! The waiter whisked the tablecloth away & handled everything beautifully. I felt so sorry for the other dinners but we carried on & also remained friends with the other couple. (I had told my husband not to take those pills on a empty stomach but of course he didn't listen!)
ReplyDeleteAt least it wasn't blood like that episode in "Downton Abbey" where Lord Grantham's ulcer perforated. That gave me nightmares. :)
DeleteEX so drunk at the family Christmas that I rang a taxi and went home with the children. Opened the frig and threw all his beer out into the back yard in the hot sun.
ReplyDeleteRevenge came much later when I was in hospital and he was picked up for drink driving right outside my mother's house who had the best view ever of the breathalyzer and the handcuffs.
I try to keep the temper under control but people still laugh at raging me throwing a vac cleaner through the front window at his departing backside.
I never made a scene, but Daddy Warbucks, the one guy I'm seeing drank so much one night at a restaurant here he tripped on his way to the restroom and landed on another patrons table, flipping the whole table and everything on it. I was never so embarrassed.
ReplyDeleteOh I wish I could have seen that .
DeleteMy husband went through a short (thank god) time of getting drunk every time we went out to dinner. Too drunk.
It was so tiresome dealing with waiters etc and trying to disappear at the same time.
Finally Ultimatum time came and we had a fabulous marriage after that ...
While dining out with my hubby the young woman at the table next to us, heavily pregnant, went into labor in a rather spectacular fashion. Her husband ran outside to get better reception for his phone to call for help but he left the poor dear alone. My husband looked at me with a pleading stare and I dutifully got up and put my arms around her. She was so scared. I turned to husband and told him to bring that future father back here! We talked about her nursery and how cute it was while we waited for the paramedics.
ReplyDeleteAn earlier incident involved my youngest sister at the El Tovar Dining Room at the Grand Canyon. I had warned her about her oversize handbag being a menace but she used it anyway. While following our manager to our table, my sister cut a corner and whapped the back of a man's head right into his soup. I stopped to apologize and she turned around and made the statement that "we can't take you anywhere." The whole dining room which had witnessed her assault with a handbag, erupted.
LOL Oh God I wish I had seen that :)
DeleteNo, sadly not had the opportunity! My husband is not one who likes eating out but for our 40th wedding anniversary I said I'd like to go out to a local winery for lunch that has great reviews. He agreed so the booking was made.
ReplyDeleteOn our 'date' morning He said he was going down the shed..I got nicely dressed ect & waited!
He came back around 2pm for lunch!
There was a scene alright..
Once, long ago, I was out with a co-worker who made a joke out of coming from a family of felons...I said, "oh, your parents must be so proud, then excused myself in pursuit of the ladies toilet. Once inside, I slid out a window and made my way to a pay phone, calling a friend to pick me up...
ReplyDeleteYou have to go thru a lot of duds to get a gem. You are lucky!
ReplyDeleteBravo!
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DeleteMy husband and I had dinner in a greek restaurant once, or lunch rather. Nice little place and popular, every table full. You could also order for taking, and one of the waitors came out of the kitchen carrying a very very high pile of lunchboxes to be delivered to a man waiting outside. The poor waiter tripped and the enormous pile started to fall, kind of in slowmotion, spreading it's contents over the floor, the tables and several guests , especially one lady gave up an impressive howl and galloped around, demanding refund and dryclean for her new, expensive coat. Us? We sat on the opposite corner, on safe distance, amazed by the scenery. Lunch have never been better!!
ReplyDeleteI loved your exit, there, John, impressive.
At the funeral services for my Irish Catholic grandmother, my nutso Jehovah Witness aunt sung the most ridiculous made-up song (off-key) about how her mother, the deceased, had taken Jehovah into her heart just before dying, thus converting on her deathbed in a swirl of dementia. That wasn't the scene, although I was mortified by the 'performance'. My other aunt, a drunk & a kook, who was sat in the front pew bolted up & out of her seat during the warble-song, blurted out some profane-laden distaste at what was going on, then marched out the front doors of the church. Everyone watched her go, nothing was said. Quite a scene, indeed.
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't a scene as such, but when I had hardly touched a meal at a local eatery VERY close to us the waiter after taking it back to the kitchen with my husbands empty plate and could be seen through the porthole windows talking to the chef who was gesticulating to our table.
ReplyDeleteThe waiter came back and asked 'exactly what was wrong with the food' in such a snotty voice that I told him, firmly and truthfully.
'The salad dressing was too oily and needed some lemon or equally acidic ingredient to cut through it and add flavour, the lettuce was slimy, possibly because of this dressing being on it for too long, the tomatoes were rock hard and chilled straight from the fridge and possibly would taste better at room temperature, whereas the grapes also in the salad were wrinkly and way past their best and could have been refreshed in icy water if necessary, the ratio of feta cheese to salad was ridiculous and the flavour over-dominated everything and finally the bowl it was served in made eating the whole thing as any sort of mix of flavours virtually impossible.'
I said it all in a calm, pleasant but very authoritative voice and as he returned to relay this to the chef who had been watching through the porthole there was a sea of nodding heads from the other diners.
The chef no longer works there, but we still haven't been back.
Calling into a pub in Yorkshire on the way back from holiday with the then boyfriend. My vegetable stir fry looked like it was all the veg scraps scooped up from the chopping board and warmed in a pan with a gallon of very salty soy sauce. It was inedible.
ReplyDeleteI took it back to the bar and complained. Boyfriend cowered in his seat, embarrassed. After he had eaten his meal I was offered a free pudding to make up. When it came to paying they wanted to charge me for the meal. I refused saying I wasn't going to pay for something I hadn't eaten, but I offered to pay for the pudding. Boyfriend couldn't get out of there quick enough. Relationship didn't last, he had no balls.
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ReplyDelete