I heard the field gate late screech around 9.30 am
I was too tired to get up.
I was working last night, and the night was filled with the dramatic and violent .
Some intensive care patients can be terribly confused.
So I went back to sleep and missed Margaret and her daughter in law delivering her hens to one of the spare houses of Anatevka.
Around 1pm, I pulled on wooley hat and wellies and went over to see how the newbees were doing. (New hens must be locked into their new hen house for at least 24 hours. After a full day and night, their peanut brains attach themselves to their new home and they don' t wander.)
I placed food and water through the poop hole of the house then opened the small back door to check on the girls. It was dark, but as I knelt on the floor I could just make out nervous bodies moving in the far side of the house then I looked upwards into the coop itself to see a very serious looking rooster looking calmly down on me.
" hello! " I said
( hello? What the hell am I saying hello to a robust looking cockerel for?)
And without further ado he kicked me very hard right in the mush!
Rooster Van Damme.
ReplyDeleteNever would have thought a full face crash helmet would be essential chicken-keeping equipment.
And ven damme , he will be named
DeleteI hope that is not a sign of things to come.....
ReplyDeleteWell now you know he's going to be very protective of his ladies.
ReplyDeleteI've still got the scars on my leg from a Rooster kick. How's yer mush?
ReplyDeleteUgly as ever
DeleteLucky you didn't lose an eye there.
ReplyDeleteOne of my favourite bands in the 1960s was Chicken Shack. This post made me think of them.
ReplyDeleteI guess he thought you had it coming, you, you ... peeping John, you!
ReplyDeleteI hope you was wearing more than just a woolly hat and wellies when you went to see the new brood!
ReplyDeleteHow many little holes are in your face? Could you use one for a ring?
ReplyDeleteYears ago we had a rooster that hated my husband. Chased him everytime he walked outside. He made good chicken and noodles :)
ReplyDeleteOuch! Glad to hear they are settling in and being well watched over by you and their little friend. Sorry about the rough night, I hope everyone is doing better today.
ReplyDeletecan't have a rooster kicking you in the mush...hope the new residents settle in quickly.
ReplyDeleteStill I suppose he and they won't be shitting on your furniture/radiators & floor soon then.
ReplyDeleteI saw the word "mush" and I thought this was going to be another story about shit. I have to admit, I'm very sorry it wasn't. Hope he didn't too much damage. I would hate for your modelling career to be cut short.
ReplyDeleteMitch, this comment made me laugh out loud.
DeleteThat's put you in your place hasn't it?
ReplyDeleteNow you know who's the boss. Next time knock first, then wait for an answer.
ReplyDeleteAnd what did that do to you . . .
ReplyDeleteMUSHED
Wounded pride that's all x
DeleteHmm pecking order springs to mind....
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure what a mush is but that doesn't sound pleasant...
ReplyDeleteSlang for face !
ReplyDeleteDoing his job...sorry.
ReplyDeletePoor mush :(
ReplyDeleteDid he say something like "take that " ?
Never darken my coop again ?
Did he sneer and call you a peeping tom ?
Did the hens all sigh and look at him with adoration ?
Damn those cocks!
ReplyDeleteI was going to ask if you knew you were getting a rooster with the ladies but then I thought of course you did.
ReplyDeleteDave's choice of Rooster Van Damme is perfect.
I was going to say he is like the John Wayne/Rooster Cogburn character.
cheers parsnip and thehamish
Mush! Another new word in my vocabulary.(Had to goggle it). I was thinking man parts!
ReplyDeleteServes you right for messing about with his poop hole.
ReplyDeleteSniggering here...
DeleteThe ungrateful so and so !
ReplyDeleteJust doing his job ... but so were you!
ReplyDeleteWhen my husband was in the intensive care unit for a week, he developed something I later learned is called "ICU Psychosis" It was terrifying for him, and no picnic for anyone ekse, either.
ReplyDeleteAnother character added to the crew: we'll be hearing more about Rooster Van Damme! Must say one is verrry curious about the ladies in his harem, but we'll wait, we'll wait...
ReplyDeleteTradition! It's Anatevka, after all! i think he was just letting you know who's man of the house...Then again, he might go very well with dumplings. You should just tell him you have the matzah balls to deal with him if he is not properly respectful!
ReplyDeleteI thought it was your testicles that copped a direct hit......
ReplyDeleteMy mom always referred to our faces as "your mush". As in: "Get your little mush out of the refrigerator, dinner will be in a little while!" Haven't heard that term in years. Thanks for the smile. BTW: Watch out for your eyes!
ReplyDeleteI don't know what a mush is...but do roosters usually kick? Here's me who wants chickens...I think I have some reading to do!
ReplyDeleteI saved a beautiful rooster from soneone else's pot and asked what breed he was. He wrote in on a bit of paper and I put it in my pocket. When I eventually read it he'd written'Barnevelder Roaster.' So he was always addressed in that way!
ReplyDeleteHello yourself I guess!
ReplyDeleteMaybe you caught him in flagrente delicto.
ReplyDeleteOoh, ouch!
ReplyDeleteWe had a rooster named Lafayette. He was an Australorp chick who turned out an extroverted Frizzle, and he was a bit of a bugger. My elderly mum bent over in the chook pen to lay out scraps and he flew her with his spurs and made her head bleed. Lafayette had as short a life after that as his namesake in the True Blood books (but not the show) and my hens were bloody glad to see the back of him.
ReplyDeleteI always say hello when face to face with a new or strange bird or animal ... as though I expect them to answer or smile at me :-/
ReplyDeleteOnce I came literally face to face with THE most glorious Barn Owl, it just sat and stared at me until I opened my big mouth and said a chirpy 'hello' .... then with a whoosh of wings it was gone.
You forgot the "Sir". "Hello Sir" is correct procedure when greeting the king of the roost the first time.
ReplyDeleteMy mom has chickens and years ago her first rooster was a Barred Rock she named Rocky. Meanest blooming bird I had come across since I was a wee one. He beat on the other rooster that was in the flock making him mean, too. We had to put Rocky in a five gallon bucket to get anything done. We'd turn him loose when we left the yard. He finally dropped dead and there was much rejoicing in the family. That still left the other though who was just as mean. For several hours after we had to watch that bird every time. I have a scar on my finger from where I took my eyes of him for a split second.
ReplyDeleteOkay that was YEARS not HOURS. It's early for me is my only excuse.
ReplyDelete