" You really need to take care of yourself" the Professor told me with a sigh recently.
I think he was making a point of things after I had used Mary's puppy shampoo to wash my hair. Or was it when he caught me going out with my pyjamas tucked underneath my trousers, anyhow it was some such event that prompted the comment.
Last night he decided that enough was enough and that drastic action was called for.
" Tonight" he informed me seriously ( over a cup of tea and slice of marks and spencers carrot cake) " we are doing girly things?"
My mind was boggled somewhat!
What were we going to do?
Have our nails done ? Colour our hair? ( what's left of it)
Watch a rom com in our dressing gowns whilst eating popcorn?
Get pissed on cheap white wine?
Oh no, the Professor had something more riveting and special in store!
I think he was making a point of things after I had used Mary's puppy shampoo to wash my hair. Or was it when he caught me going out with my pyjamas tucked underneath my trousers, anyhow it was some such event that prompted the comment.
Last night he decided that enough was enough and that drastic action was called for.
" Tonight" he informed me seriously ( over a cup of tea and slice of marks and spencers carrot cake) " we are doing girly things?"
My mind was boggled somewhat!
What were we going to do?
Have our nails done ? Colour our hair? ( what's left of it)
Watch a rom com in our dressing gowns whilst eating popcorn?
Get pissed on cheap white wine?
Oh no, the Professor had something more riveting and special in store!
Facial beauty wraps!
Yeah........
It was a big job
Oh dear God, it's Hannibal 'John' Lecter! X
ReplyDeleteNo...
Delete"Fifty Shades of Hannibal Gray"
Dear frogs and pollywogs, The Mummy!
ReplyDeleteNeed an "after" shot as well!
ReplyDeleteI'd have chosen the getting pissed option myself...
ReplyDeleteMe too.
DeleteMe too. A bucket load of el cheapo vino and a giant bag of crisps
DeleteLush gals x
DeleteOh dear I really wandered what had happened to you when I glimpsed that picture...
ReplyDeleteTe he he
ReplyDeleteBriony
x
That looks horrific John! I am surprised that Mary didn't try to bite your face off!!!
ReplyDeleteheh heh heh heh!
ReplyDeleteOMG......I just nearly choked on my coffee.
ReplyDeleteHope it did the trick and made you all beautiful.
Absolutely Fabulous Darling.
ReplyDeleteSo did it work? Are you now drop-dead gorgeous and looking ten years younger?
ReplyDeleteYes, but what did you REALLY do?!!
ReplyDeleteI do sometimes worry about you my good man.
ReplyDeletei think products like that are a bit of a con but whatever makes you happy!
ReplyDeleteDoes it go through beards?
ReplyDeleteBut did it WORK?!
ReplyDeleteWe need proof . . .
ReplyDeleteTake my word for it...i now look fab
DeleteI agree did it work then?
ReplyDeleteOh honey .. did your pores shrink ? Is your skin as soft as a baby's bottom ?
ReplyDeleteBe careful, it can sometimes be habit forming .. soft skin and all that .
Wow! That is one of the most bizarre images I've seen on this blog yet. And there is a lot of competition! Doesn't the Prof KNOW that beauty comes from within? :-) You have however shamed me into washing my hair after 12 days (red face). Now, where's the puppy shampoo....?
ReplyDeletejust say NO! get pissed instead! and eat more carrot cake.
ReplyDeleteMake me want to run out and change the oil in the car or something manly. Have Fun!
ReplyDeleteWot, no Cucumber slices!!!
ReplyDeleteHahaha!!!
ReplyDeleteNext week ..... the male equivalent of a Vagisil !!!!!! XXXX
ReplyDeleteDoes that mean you put these kind of things on your fanny?
Deleteoh my gosh you make me laugh,,
ReplyDeleteeveryone could use a little pampering, why not!!
cover of....Walking Dead?
ReplyDeleteWhat happened next?
ReplyDeleteWe took them off after 30 minutes
DeleteVery rock n roll
That gave me a much needed giggle. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteGolly John......who needs to watch The Walking Dead when they have that to look at.
ReplyDeleteNever seen them before - looks like damp baking parchment to me.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'm more low maintenance than I thought.
Are you trying to scare the living daylights out of your followers?
ReplyDeleteYou delight me endlessly.
ReplyDeleteOoohhh errr missus
DeleteUpon first glance I was reminded of a cross between Hannibal Lecter and Jason of horror film legend. How did the dogs react? Are you all glowing and dewy now? -Jenn
ReplyDeleteI now look fabulous
DeleteThere was an article about women paying more for the same product than men pay because of the 'pink' packageing. Shampoo razors- that kind of thing. Here in France the dog's shampoo is even more expensive - for silky white fur. If I swap to the dog's product will it stop the tics and fleas?
ReplyDeleteThe peel off face masks are my favourite
ReplyDeleteSurely something has slipped?
ReplyDeleteMy arse
DeleteCharming ... save one of those things for Halloween. Was it helpful? I have never tried and could use, IF they work.
ReplyDeleteHannibal the cannibal ! X
ReplyDeleteA hoot!
ReplyDeleteYou're a good sport, John. I'm not big on the girly stuff either...
ReplyDeleteFor a minute there,with that mask, I thought you were joining the cast of the Walking dead....hee hee. In the meantime. I really came here to send you a link. Perhaps it might be time to treat a certain lady for her birthday?
ReplyDeletehttps://www.facebook.com/ClassicHits4FM/videos/722834014419389/
Id make a crap zombie..id only chase daryl
DeleteYou must assert your manliness! "We ll do your pampering right after you finish sweeping the peas and crumbs from under the stove, Prof-sweetie."
ReplyDeletejesus freaking christ that is scary.
ReplyDeleteJesus h christ!
DeleteHi John,Have just joined your Blog,I have been a "lurker" for a little while,dropping in for my daily dose of humour-today's post has made me laugh...."have the Lambs stopped screaming Clarice?" hope you feel all squeaky clean after your Hanibal mask!! Nessa :)
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the nut house nessa x
DeleteOMG! I adore this! I agree with all the Hannibal comments! Love that your partner cares for you so!
ReplyDeleteHe's a peach x
DeleteI would have gone for the rom-com and popcorn instead, to be honest. -made me chuckle to read you've washed your hair with puppy soap. I've resorted to using a bar of soap when the shampoo bottle turns out to be empty.
ReplyDeleteIve brushed my teeth with dog toothpaste once too
DeleteOh no - sorry John - what a laugh, just hope no-one came to the door while you were wearing it ! Did you change into your Noel Coward silk dressing gown and cravat afterwards?
ReplyDeleteDid the prof have a wrap too?
Yes the ptof had his own but efused a selfie
ReplyDeleteAt least it was not one of those sticky things - one of those would have pulled like the deuce on your facial hair! You are such a good sport :)
ReplyDeleteI think John should book a ' full face threading session' for the prof. If we can do it, they can do it.
DeleteWell you must have higher standards than me...I can't honestly remember the last time I had a face pack! Arilx
ReplyDeleteMucky cow x
DeleteLast time I had my nails done "professionally" was by our Morris dancing squire who is also a beautician and he scolded me for not ever bothering to use a base coat!!
DeleteArilx
Oh, the things we do to please the ones we love!
ReplyDeleteAint THAT the truth
DeleteLOL
ReplyDeleteBeauty wraps! That's something I've never done. I've applied the facial cream mask once or twice, but mostly I just wash my face and apply a little moisturiser. I'm not a very girly girl. Thankfully, my mum gave me good skin.
ReplyDeleteI can always count on you two for a good chuckle and you have the balls to photograph it as well.
ReplyDeleteLOL. You are hysterical. You look like the masked killer in some old Hammer House of Horror episode.
ReplyDeleteA bar of soap is about as exotic as I ever get.
Looks like fun, I have to build up for my girly nights as they involve much waxing of legs ... and things!
ReplyDeleteRefreshing, wasn't it.
ReplyDeleteYou should wear the facial wraps all the time. They make you look even more handsome than normal.
ReplyDeleteDid that mask make your beard all soft too ;-)
ReplyDeleteLast time I used one of those I came out all red and blotchy .... not the result I was after at all.
Oh. My. God!
ReplyDeleteThat pic was a little scary. I hope it was worth it!
ReplyDelete