Cheese


It's 1.42 am and I have just got home after shift ( gotten home Rachel?)
We had my aunt up for dinner last night and I forgot to lock up the hens, what with the picking up from the station and cooking and all that shit....anyhow by the time I remembered ( 6.30 pm) the badgers had struck and the coop with  the remaining geriatric hens was emptied.
I only know it was the badgers cos when I was out just now with William ( and his overactive bladder) a large huffing badger passed us in the lane with a large white Sussex in it's mouth.
My fault.....my fault but you can't keep all the balls in the air at once.
So apart from the geese, the Ukrainian village is sadly empty.
I will restock in spring
Hey ho!

Anyhow I was stopped by the police tonight too...I knew I would be. I was breathalysed and asked what I was up to and when I said " going home" the policeman quickly noted a bottle of port on the passenger seat!
" It's from my auntie Judy for Christmas  " I told him "and  there's a box of cheese to go with it"
I waved a marks and spencer multi cheese set in his direction to prove my point
" I only get socks from my auntie" the policeman said sadly and waved me on.

39 comments:

  1. cheese and crackers! poor hens; what a way to turn the holidays upside down.

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  2. Oh poor hens! Such is life - spring time will find a new batch then! I like port - Sandeman is my favorite. Never had it with cheese - now I have something to look forward to! :)

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  3. I am so sorry. Most of us can have a temporary period of forgetfulness without such dire results.

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  4. Sorry that's the end of your hens, John. That crap happens to the best of us.
    So ... You got some cheese with that wine, hum?
    Sure does beat socks.

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  5. My dear friend- this post makes me feel so much better about myself. We have forgotten to shut the hens in before and have lost some. But no- you cannot keep all of the balls in the air. It's not possible. And in the spring, I too shall get a few more chicks. I can't wait.
    Be well. Thank you for your blog. I mean that.

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  6. I am grieving those poor hens .. you need a bloodthirsty hound tied to the hen fence or whatever is there .. lock those poor things up to be safe ! poor chickens :(
    I would never make it living on a farm ~

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  7. Oh poor man, only socks! I have to say we have quoll problems here with our chickens..sorry about yours and the wicked badger. Hope your port and cheese is scrumptious.

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  8. Oh My Goodness, so sorry about the hens.
    We all get busy and forget stuff. But at this time of the year we just get so busy.
    I have to write a check list now. I have some brain damage and my life is very strange. I forget everything and it take longer to do everything.
    I think you can just chalk your hens up to the busy season.
    Spring will be so much more fun with new chicks.

    cheers, parsnip

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  9. I'm so glad that you got a nice police officer, and I'm sure he really did envy you that wine and cheese!

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  10. My hens are in a small wired enclosure, but their hen-house is always open. We have plenty of Badgers around but as yet they've not been targeted. It sounds to me like you really DO need that .22 rifle for Christmas.

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  11. . . . . . and port is nothing without a great English Stilton! I have both awaiting Christmas Eve Open House - come on over!

    Sorry about your hens - we don't have badgers here, just possums, foxes and raccoons.

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  12. Sorry about your hens, John. Nice police officer. But port and cheese...... now that should be something to look forward to!

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  13. Sorry about your hens, John, and though a very sad way to go, console yourself that you gave them a good life. These things happen and you can't be on the ball all the time, it's just not possible.

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  14. Shame about the hens, you can't be expected to keep all the balls in the air all the time, at least they were elderly and had lived out their dotage in your happy field.

    The geese should be safer they make enough noise to wake the dead if they get disturbed.

    Poor policeman ...... I bet he thinks you travel everywhere with your cheese and port as passengers just to show off that you don't get socks for Christmas ;-)

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  15. I thought foxes were bad enough! Very glad not to have to contend with badgers... or coyotes for that matter, after my hens as well! Ah well a quick death might be preferable to some of the ways my geriatric chooks have gotten dealthy ill over the years. I've had to toughen up and learn to take the place of the badger.

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  16. How did you know you would be stopped, breathalysed and asked what you were up to? What WERE you up to?

    Sorry about the hens.

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  17. I'm sorry to read this John, it sucks hairy green donkey balls... you're right though, it's just not possible to keep all the balls in the air all the time, no matter how you try.

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  18. No trouble with badgers here, but the fox is always waiting and watching.
    You have reminded me of the bottle of port my father always bought especially for Christmas (along with a small bottle of Drambuie) we were allowed a small Port and lemon in a proper wine glass on Christmas day. We felt SO grown up.

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  19. Oh dear! How sad. I have friends who had to create a humungous free-range size wire cage, with floor, roof and walls to protect their hens from hawks! He joked that each egg cost about $10 !
    Next spring the cycle will be renewed.

    Happy Christmas to you both,

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  20. I know exactly how you're feeling about those poor birds. You want to take down your decorations and replace them with mourning sable, don't you? I know 'cos that's what I'd be doing. Try not to postpone such thoughts until after Twelfth Night, and then you can cry those buckets.
    As for that copper, as well as wishing him in appropriate seasonal style, maybe you might also have offered him 'One for the Road'.

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  21. SOrry to hear about the hens. Electric fencing?

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  22. Early Christmas dinner for the badgers.

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  23. Oh John, so so sorry about the hens! What a bugger just before Christmas... but like you say balls in the air and all that... sad as it is they had a good life in the Ukrainian Village and have gone onto the never never... I wonder whether the cop recognised you? (Celeb in his midst!!) I love Port but have to have it with lemonade or I get far too pished!!

    Jo in Auckland, NZ

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  24. Glad you passed the breathalyzer, this would be a different post from inside the local police station. The hens are, well part of the circle of life. On most farms, they would have been stew months or even years ago. Don't be to hard on yourself, do take care.

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  25. I hope you have told Chris about this John as it is obvious that Officer Dibble was giving you the "come on". Was he like that young cop from "Road Wars"?

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  26. Sadly, badgers happen to all of us from time to time and spring is only a couple of months away.

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  27. So sorry about the hens.

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  28. Damn Badgers....there has to be something to get rid of the buggers!

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  29. Tough about the hens, but how was your Aunt? Slow cooked or roasted? No left overs?

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  30. it's one of the reasons my sister stopped keeping chickens...even when they were put up, the raccoons would still manage to get in or the little chicken killing dogs on the other side of the fence would get in.

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  31. That's too bad about your hens (and amazing that you caught a glimpse of the culprit with one in its mouth!). We have what are called "ride checks" here (Ontario) but we are not breathalyzed unless the police feel it is necessary. They lean right into your window trying to look around and get a sniff of alcohol on your breath. -Jenn

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  32. Great exchange. Good you didn't feel sorry for him and give him the bottle of port (or the cheese); it might have been considered a bribe. (By the time I hit my 20s, none of MY aunties ever gave me anything!)

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  33. I am a resident of the Badger State (Wisconsin)and I have seen a wild badger only twice. They are intriguing animals but I am so sorry they got to your elderly hens. Keeping your balls in the air must be exhausting. Rest a bit and enjoy the port.

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  34. So sorry about the hens, John. Something usually "gives" during these busy times and we are only human after all.

    And I am glad the port was on the seat and not in your stomach at the police check point!

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  35. Anonymous9:31 pm

    Poor old chickies....what a way to go.

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  36. I did the same thing the night before my birthday, and I felt so bad, it's not the first time and most likely not the last dang time either! In good yard-bird news, I gathered the first duck egg from our newest ducks. Our continuing mild winter is being enjoyed by the flock. All the best to you and your handsome hubby for a wonderfully cozy Christmas! Pat the dogs once for me...

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  37. The village is now a 'ghost town'!
    It sucks to be human, eh John?
    Celebrate the good times they provided you and us with the wine and cheese.

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  38. You were far luckier than your hens. It's the cycle of life, not your fault.

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  39. So sorry about your hens :-( and I hope the Aunt you had for dinner wasn't too chewy.

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