Today I am trying to catch the young cockerel who arrived only a few weeks ago
He's got into the habit of roosting in the tree in the corner of the churchyard
( next to the light in the lane)
Subsequently He has been crowing rather too loudly from 4 am onwards
So far the neighbours have been kind....but I am sure he'll wear them down eventually
I am working this evening so I shall leave you with a stolen quote
one of my egg customers repeated to me yesterday
It amused me greatly.
As I handed over the eggs through his car window, he asked rather
dryly
" what's the difference between erotic and kinky?"
His question stumped me just a little as the chap is a grandfather of four who is not generally known for more " colourful " conversation.
" you're asking me?" I replied in my best Jewish voice, not quite knowing what to say
He motioned me to come closer and dropped his voice
" Erotic........is when you obtain sexual satisfaction from using a feather!"
I nodded, wondering just what was coming next
" kinky.........." He looked around slowly" ......is when you use the whole chicken"
Oh, erm....!
ReplyDeleteI don't suppose you have the same joke about wool up there do you?
ReplyDeleteWhat is jewish voice?
ReplyDeleteHe says he doesn't know, already.
DeleteIt's my ." Why aren't you eating your chicken soup" voice if that helps
DeleteYes. we the jewish mothers have some strange voices sometimes.
DeleteHaha.
DeleteIs it like a Woody Allen voice?
DeleteNay, nay, and thrice nay.
DeleteThink Golde from FIDDLER ON THE ROOF
DeleteThink stereotype .
DeletePoint taken x
Deleteok:)
DeleteI thought we were picking names for more of your animals for a minute :-)
ReplyDeleteThat's my NEXT competition
Deletebwhahahahahaha! why does that chicken pix remind me of mae west on a couch?
ReplyDeleteCome up and see it sometime
DeleteAn oldie but a goodie. Sounds like it was a bit of a surprise to hear from his mouth. Cockerel is such a formal word. Surely it is better to use the abbreviated word that we all know so well.
ReplyDeleteTut tut
DeleteYou never know what thoughts are harbored inside these graying heads -
ReplyDeleteMaybe you should stop selling him eggs!
ReplyDeleteThat's hilarious John......I'll bet that put a smile on your face for the rest of the day.
ReplyDeleteFunny!!! Gotta love your neighbors!
ReplyDeleteSome of them are mad as badgers
DeleteThe word Paxo never entered my head!
ReplyDeleteIt's funny when we hear lines like this coming from a most unexpected source, eh John?!
ReplyDeleteAnd no 'words' at all about the Scottish vote outcome?
Jumbo...I was surprised
DeleteI thought they would vote yes..honest I did
The subject has been done to death
Suffice to say... I am glad
Awww. I am touched that you are glad. I'm a Scot and personally I'd like to be rid of at least half of them. :)
DeleteAnyway, here we are and here we stay, for now.
That gentleman sure knows his audience, eh?!
ReplyDeleteOoo you are naughty - but I like it.
ReplyDeleteNo wonder the cockerel is roosting in the tree! Hiding more like from the erotic/kinky customer!!!
ReplyDeleteAs long as it's not a Moscovy Duck, you're within the limits of normal.
ReplyDeleteJust 'cos there's snow on the roof doesn't mean there isn't a fire in the chimney............or something like that.....sometimes stuff like this is funnier when it comes from an unexpected source.
ReplyDeleteYou have just inspired my next post with this x
DeleteNot your standard Oxford dictionary definitions, that's for sure ... the picture is priceless!
ReplyDeleteapparently it caused much angst in the US
DeleteHe then felt pleased with himself for the rest of the day because you are a good listener and he knew it would not shock you but on the other hand it was risqué enough to give him a little bit of a thrill so on balance all happy. I think it is nice.
ReplyDeleteOh, I hadn't heard that one, LOL! Pretty good!
ReplyDelete(Now if I can just remember it...)
That made me laugh!
ReplyDeleteMy job here is done x
DeleteA very clever image. On first sight it looks like a chicken. On second sight it looks like a headless person. Fascinating ambiguity.
ReplyDeleteWhich reminds me, where did I put that feather? I'm ready for a bit of slap and tickle....
Fannar fannar
DeleteI wonder where he obtained that wisdom from...
ReplyDeleteAnd for how long he has wanted to share it with you.
DeleteOne afternoon last winter, when we were experiencing a rare snowfall, an elderly man approached me (at work) and said,
ReplyDelete"Know how to tell the difference between a snowman and a snowlady?"
"Ummm....no...."
"SNOWBALLS!"
Then he walked off cackling. :)
dude sounds like he has a better sex life than I ever will....
ReplyDeleteHey much.. Chin up................
Delete
DeleteHaha 'sex life' - not since Feb 2008*.....and I'm married!!!
x
*My choice, for good** reasons btw
** found out husband (aka The Fuckwit) was a cheater***
***why not divorce? fragile daughter, that's why****
****oops oversharing again lol
(0.o)
ReplyDeleteHaha. Oh my. Have a great weekend, John!