Tuesday, 10 June 2014

Nipples

I was a bit naughty this morning......I took the welsh terriers to the vet for their booster vaccinations and sneakily took Winifred into the surgery with me because  as I said " I didn't want her to be left in the car - she's an expensive dog"
There was method in my madness
As William and Meg stood sweetly for their jabs and that awful kennel cough squirt up the nose, Winnie gazed up at the pretty Irish vet all goo- goo eyed and hopeful for kiss.......
Eventually the vet ( who had a charmingly natural approach with the dogs - and who swore just a little , like most native Irish folk do) succumbed to Winnie's advances and " made a fuss"
As she did so. I asked her to give the bulldog a quick health check, knowing full well that I wouldn't be charged for it.
Result
Apparently Winnie is in A1 health and has ( interestingly ?) an exceptionally large vulva
Meg looks like a young welsh terrier rather than a nine year old bitch
And William has " lovely teeth"
I told the Irish vet of Winnie's bath time adventures of Monday
And She laughed a throaty attractive laugh
" If I had fallen into a hot bath....I would have shat myself too with nipples like hers!" She chortled

I had to think about that one.

33 comments:

  1. I am still thinking about 'that one' but I remain unenlightened.

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    1. You need to see Winnie's nipples
      She has had two large litters before we got her
      So has nipples like chapel hat pegs

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  2. I beg you...no nipple photos!!!

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  3. hahaha every time something on your blog reeeally tickles my fancy i announce it to my kids who never fail to say "who is that again, oh yes the one with the animals"
    unfortunately they are all in school right now and i have nobody to giggle with but oh boy oh boy will they enjoy it after school!

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  4. You are so much fun to visit!

    Thanks for the laugh.

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  5. You sure do know how to title your posts to drive traffic to your blog! Anyone who searches "nipples" and stays to read anyway is a good follower to have. Cheers to your lovely vet.

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  6. My last blog visit before I seek sleep and I read of an exceptionally large vulva and hot water on nipples. Will I have dreams or nightmares, I wonder...

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  7. Vulvalicious. Sorry, can't think of anything else.

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  8. I like what Susie said. I'm confused about nipples. Mine are not extraordinarily large, but small or large, I would not shit myself (I don't think) if I fell into a hot bath already occupied by a man.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. You might - if you had TEN big ones like a breeding bulldog.... ;-)

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    2. So a dog's nipples, if enlarged, are sensitive? Are they not sensitive if the dog hasn't had puppies?

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  9. So glad all the pups are in great health and you have a nice vet.

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  10. your vet has a bit of shock sence of fun like you (leave the bastards laughing and wondering what next on the edge of their seats)

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  11. A vet with a sense of humour - perfect !

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  12. I wouldn't know a vulva even if one jumped up and slapped me in the face. I think my brother-in-law had one. Myself, I don't drive.

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  13. Raybeard! LOL! (that means: laughing out loud, just in case) :-) (that means: big smile) xxx (that means: I love you)

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    1. Was it really THAT funny, E.? Well, maybe J.G. thinks so too. Must get someone explain it to me - with diagrams.

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  14. I think I prefer your drooling over the George Clooney lookalike than all this talk about Irish nipples...

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  15. Nips and fanny; what a show at your blog!

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  16. My vet doesn't even crack a smile...lucky you!

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  17. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  18. Winnie continues to amaze...A very "tit"illating story!

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  19. When I saw the title of this post I thought 'Bosoms' had been extended with a row of plant pots to one side ;-)

    The titles you'll use to get new followers ... you are a shameless hussy!!

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    Replies
    1. I've just lost one.....go figure!

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  20. Lady Beldon in the morning, nipples in the afternoon. What a day!

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  21. Speaking of vulvas......our dog Sophie has a 'particularly small and inverted vulva'.......which causes problems and needs attention and topical medication. Just thought you needed to know this, John.

    And I thought this post was about your 'George Clooney' vet!!

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  22. I really need to stop reading comments on your posts in the morning, I laughed till I farted thank you Raybeard. I might add that I was sitting in my office with five other people.

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    1. Sometimes I just can't stop them coming out, Doc - rather like your farts (and mine too, if it comes to that!)

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  23. Thank you, thank you, thank you to the commenters (ahem raybeard and Doc especially) and yourself as you have just rescued a particularly bad day.
    In the words of Dame Edna - "I love you all"
    susan x
    {excuse me - 'honeymoon fresh' as my three came out the sun roof!!!}
    TMI - yes? no? who cares!

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    1. Thank you, Susan. (Says I as I crawl back into my box.)

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  24. Nipples like hers? Heck get her some bikini tops to cover it all up.

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