The Kitchen Table


It's going on three o'clock and I am sat at the kitchen table
after picking over the carcass of a roast chicken
One bowl of chicken bits is destined for tomorrow's lunch
The rest will be shared between the dogs and the field birds.

We have just finished lunch
and Chris has gone to Church,
I think he's ringing the bell today. 
It's tolling rather quickly.

The cottage is silent apart from the sound of a bulldog and three terriers licking chicken fat
from some foil bowls outside the back door.
Albert is asleep on the couch, he hasn't smelt the chicken as yet.
I continue with my mindless job.
Kitchen tables are a place for mindless activity.

Shelling peas,
Baking,
Making idle lists on the back of envelopes.
Squeezing dog's anal glands
Polishing silver.

I have a load of washing up to do, the dogs to walk,
the broody hens all need turfing off their eggs for a quick feed
and I still have to deliver eggs to Michelle up the Marian

But I can't be arsed moving,
So I will sit at the kitchen table a while longer,
and continue with some mindless activity
ie. blog writing.
Hey ho

70 comments:

  1. It's the same here. I love imagining the sound of the animals licking the chicken fat. It is a red wine Sunday afternoon while I wait for P to get back from his Mother's.

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  2. Dogs & chicken fat. I misread it and my mind saw chicken farts, which always happened to our dog when he ate chicken fat. Thanks for the memory!

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  3. I'm about to roast my chicken.... the dogs and hens be blowed; they can eat something else!

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  4. I never do the anal gland thing with our dog. Does that make me a stupid pet owner? But I thought you only had to worry when they scoot across the floor. I'm wracked with self-doubt now.

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    Replies
    1. We have to do it more or less weekly........ Poor William
      It's an acquired skill and not one we should boast about

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    2. I have a black lab and do it every couple of weeks....deep joy I don't share this habit with many people

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    3. John, I still want to learn how to kill a chicken - no one here will teach me. It's a still I want to learn, and the anal gland thing - done it, glad I don't have to do it often.

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    4. Feed them bread soaked in wine, then when they're 'squiffy', lightly kill with an air gun pellet to the back of the head.

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  5. The kitchen table is a great gathering place when we have company.

    Enjoy your day.

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  6. for a second there, I thought you were going to say the "sound of a bulldog and three terriers" farting.

    have a lovely restful sunday, john!

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  7. Anonymous2:53 pm

    I like mindless activity. Ummm.....I had the same thought as anne marie in philly...sorry about that.

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    Replies
    1. How many schoolboys have we got here?

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    2. no boys, just dirty old ladies! :)

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  8. If those drinking glasses are plastic, we had the same exact ones (both the stripes and the polka dots) in Connecticut that we purchased to use poolside. (I have a feeling you didn't purchase yours for that reason.)

    So now I guess I'll get back to squeezing some dogs' anal glands. (Is that what you use to polish the silver?)

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    Replies
    1. Only glass in this house darling!

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    2. I had no idea we had cheap imitations of "real" Welsh drinking glasses.

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  9. Anonymous3:05 pm

    Kindred spirits, John. Except I haven't roasted a chicken. All dogs, cats and chickens shining by their absence in my life. That's Sunday afternoon for you. Or rather me. Still, the Angel - on his way back from Leeds, after a gig he played at last night - should shine on my parade and brighten my life any time soon. In the meantime I fold his socks and millions of T shirts. Yes, John, loving is hard work. But then we do need to be needed, don't we?

    Apropos of nothing: I was taught to never give a dog a chicken BONE because they splinter. Old wife's tale or true? Other than that, and it's no comfort to you or me: I can't be arsed either to do what I should be doing. But will. Despite myself. Where there is hot water there is washing up.

    1559 hrs GMT.

    U

    PS I suppose bell ringing is a bit more imaginative by way of keeping biceps in shape than going to the gym.

    PPS Much love to Albert

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    Replies
    1. I was always told to only give a raw chicken to a dog or cat
      Never a cooked one....
      I have never done either

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  10. My kitchen table is only ever used for eating at when RJ is staying for the weekend, or with guests in general. When I am on my own, I am one of those slouchy slobs who have their meals from a tray in front of the telly. Doing that makes of course for a kitchen table that is always clean and tidy... (not that I need that as an excuse for having my cheese sarnies and chocolate in front of the telly)

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    Replies
    1. The older I get, the more I enjoy the table...funny that

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  11. It was all going so nicely that I almost nodded off in a reverie - then your mentioned the anal glands.

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    Replies
    1. A bit of reality never hurt any dreamy writing
      Tee hee

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  12. a perfect sunday...

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    Replies
    1. Although the food was not as good as yours

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  13. Soporific Sunday afternoon. Drowsing over the chicken bits or a book; I wish us many more.

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  14. Whoa, an idyllic picture - until the anal glands. I have failed miserably at dealing with this task. Surgical gloves, lubricant, profuse apologies and an anus so squeezed tight (the dog's that is) that I end up taking the dog to the vets - again. Kerching £20!!! Does your nursing background help? I analyse medical info so not a doer must make all the difference.

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    Replies
    1. Chris does it best....he's got the knack

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  15. Love those lazy days. Love (@Joanne use of the word Soporific)
    For me it is this morning.
    Maybe a book, some juice or coffee a extra piece of toast and a view out the window. Today the Quail are out and about in force.

    cheers, parsnip

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  16. Ive been for a lazy stroll, with an old friend, around the Malverns.. two halfs of scrumpy.... Should have cleaned out chickens, picked up dog poop, ironed, weeded veg patches, washed beds, cleaned pond filter.........I chose an afternoon with two dogs, a laid-back friend and sunshine! Ha well all the other stuff can wait

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  17. A happy home on a lazy afternoon

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  18. We don't have a kitchen table,so I'm sitting in the living room drinking coffee,about to do the crossword whilst Chis is in his office, working. I'm keeping a lookout for impending rain (I have washing on the line). Shepherd's pie for dinner tonight...one I made earlier. Another thrill filled Sunday afternoon.
    Jane x

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    Replies
    1. Shepherds pie......the ultimate comfort food

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    2. nope, it's tomato soup and a grilled cheese sammich!

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    3. Nope
      SCOTCH EGGS AND CREAMY MASH POTATO

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    4. I have just found out we have a "scotch egg specialist shop" in Worcester city centre) scotch bonnet scotch eggs, black pudding scotch eggs, old spot pork scotch eggs etc etc etc (I am ashamed to admit I have a day off tomorrow and I plan to visit this shop before any other

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    5. Oh be still my beating heart

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    6. http://www.handmadescotcheggs.co.uk/

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  19. Sounds like perfect peace. Thank you for your sweet comment on my blog.

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  20. The perfect Sunday, minus those anal glands. I was going to say glossing over them but the image was too revolting. x

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  21. Reading your blog is an education John. I never realised that dogs anal glands required squeezing until I read it first, here. x

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    Replies
    1. Don't knock it , if you haven't tried it

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  22. Catching up on your blog on a Sunday, among my favorite things to do.

    Enjoyed the post on George, he's opposite of Todd who is always in front of everything, and can easily outrun the other dogs.

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    Replies
    1. I thought Todd was a lively soul
      Is he a comic like George is?

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  23. Albert didn't hadn't smelled the chicken?!!!! In our house that would mean a trip to the vet. I swear Jazz hears us think about chicken - and is at the fridge before we have taken it out.

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  24. Mystery solved! If you can call baking a mindless activity, it's no wonder your quiche has a soggy bottom....Fanny Craddock must be spinning in her grave...

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  25. I love sitting at the kitchen table and looking mindlessly looking out the window......great contemplation space

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  26. You HAD to throw in 'squeezing dog's anal glands' didn't you!! lol
    That is something I never have to deal with, Ron does it! lol
    I too am partial to those glasses....almost look vintage 'banded and polka dot'.

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  27. You got me at anal glands. Happy Sunday indeed.

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  28. I enjoy sitting chatting after a nice meal, picking a bit , here and there from the leftovers on the serving plates and just watching life go by. Another favorite place is standing with my hands in the hot water in the sink and gazing out the kitchen window at the birds, cats and of course Bogart the wonderdog...as the rain (or snow - maybe later this week!) falls

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  29. Sounds like a wonderful afternoon, John. Just something about anal glands and polishing silver that had me looking twice. ;-)
    Have a wonderful Monday, John!

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  30. I watched Midsummer Murders last night about the bell ringers being murdered! Hope Chris was ok!!

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  31. Oh my gooooooddddd! I can always rely on you to bring me, choking with my first cup of tea and tears of laughter in my eye, to attention in the mornings. I was just picturing a scrubbed, pine, rustic kitchen table, a bowl of peas, perhaps a warmed tea pot and some scones.....then you hit me with the anal glands And the whole picture changed. Aaaaaaaagggggghhhhh. I am now wide awake, thanks John . X

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  32. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  33. Can't help it - grew up with two older brothers. They helped warp my outlook on things.

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  34. It was all sounding so nice and genteel.... and then you mentioned the anal glands. I've never done that, squeeze them I mean .... I wonder if I should !!

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  35. I see that everyone commenting before me had the same experience - stopped short by the anal glands!!!

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  36. Sometimes, the legs just don't want to stand you up and start moving. It is not your fault.

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  37. I am troubled by how routinely anal gland squeezing seems to fit in with other chores related to the preparation of food. Fortunately I have not been invited for tea,

    Now I am off to ask Professor Google about anal glands, for I have never heard of them. Do I have some? If so should I be getting them squeezed? After 58 years of neglect I hope that I don't have any (for the sake of the lady who would have to squeeze them).

    I like this blog. I should visit more often. Much to learn.

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    Replies
    1. Back from consulting Google. How enlightening. I never knew I had so much in me, and hidden away in places nobody ever looks. Well, well, well...

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