Ex Battery Hen


Oh. I am a battery hen, on me back there's not a germ,

I never scratched a farmyard, and I never pecked a worm,

I never had the sunshine, to warm me feathers through,

Eggs I lay. Every day. For the likes of you.
When you has them scrambled, piled up on your plate,

It's me what you should thank for that, I never lays them late,

I always lays them reg'lar, I always lays them right,
I never lays them brown, I always lays them white.

But it's no life, for a battery hen, in me box I'm sat,

A funnel stuck out from the side, me pellets comes down that,

I gets a squirt of water, every half a day,
Watchin' with me beady eye, me eggs roll away.


I lays them in a funnel, strategically placed,

So that I don't kick 'em and let them go to waste,

They rolls off down the tubing, and up the gangway quick,
Sometimes I gets to thinkin' "That could have been a chick!"

I might have been a farmyard hen, scratchin' in the sun,

There might have been a crowd of chicks, after me to run,

There might have been a cockerel fine, to pay us his respects,
Instead of sittin' here till someone comes and wrings our necks.

I see the Time and Motion clock, is sayin' nearly noon,

I 'spec me squirt of water, will come flyin' at me soon,

And then me spray of pellets, will nearly break me leg,
And I'll bite the wire nettin' and lay one more bloody egg


This single old battery hen was dropped off to me this morning
The last survivor of a batch of 6
Retiring in the sun
Me thinks

55 comments:

  1. Pam Ayres or homage to?
    Jane x

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  2. Hope she really enjoys her life with you :) Couldn't find a better place, apart from here, with me ;)

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  3. She couldn't have a more loving retirement home...

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  4. She's found her spot of paradise after a hard life, she'll be okay now.

    (Nice to see she at least has her full beak, some of them break your heart when you see how badly they get 'de-beaked'.)

    I get more love from my little rescue battery hen than all the others put together, they are delightful little souls.

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  5. Bless you, John.

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  6. She's found her way to the honey hole :)
    Bless her.
    ~Jo

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  7. I had no idea there was a song written for battery hens. I like it. Battery sure is the right word for it.

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  8. What a bit of bliss that will be for the old girl.

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  9. You'll need to get some new batteries for it. Other than that, good find.

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  10. That made me cry. I've seen pictures of hens that are shoved into cages, 4 to a cage and no feathers, bloody heads.....I won't go on. I even have a friend that lives in Arkansas where Tyson is a huge presence and she has a patient that has a full time job picking up dead chickens every day of the week. She averages 300 a day!!! And that's for the chickens that aren't in battery cages.
    You are an angel to take in these poor creatures to live their remaining days in critter bliss. There's a special place in heaven for you John. (sappy moment complete)

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  11. Anonymous5:07 pm

    John, one of my many strong feelings is about battery chickens. The very thought makes me sick. Rather pay through my nose for a 'happy' run around the courtyard egg and its layer. Indeed a 'happy' anything. I know we all need to eat but there is eat and eat. And some practices enough to turn off my appetite.

    Wonderful photograph. Full of light and hope. Happy retirement, hen.

    U

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  12. Have a good time old girl.

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  13. And some thoughtful poetry. It seems your talents are endless.

    First of all, I deplore the thought of hens not being free-range. The cruelty of being cooped up just beggars belief. So, I wont leave a flippant comment such as how do you charge up a battery hen.

    When's you NEXT posting?

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  14. Wonderful to be giving the hen a happy home John. I think battery houses should have been closed down years ago. My hens are totally free range and their egg yolks are golden yellow - when I see the eggs of battery hens they are pale cream. It is a disgrace that the method is allowed to continue. Here's hoping you hen has a long and happy life - I bet she can't believe her luck.

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  15. Run free, dear little hen. Peck at the earth and talk to the other hens!

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  16. Oh what bliss for this dear hen to have landed in paradise with you, John. Are her legs strong enough to run around? (I heard their bones are brittle from sitting all day-poor pets) We don't have battery hens in East Africa - all free range - but South Africa has had these "fowl/foul concentration camps" since the sixties. Awful. Thanks for taking her in. Wondering what her name will be? Greetings, Jo

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    Replies
    1. To be fair she was well looked after in her previous home....the one after the battery farm

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  17. That hen looks like it needs a new battery in it! Like those Duracell rabbits. Don't opt for inferior batteries!

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  18. One of Pam's earliest poems...I've just finished reading her autobiography.

    Poor hen - I'm glad she'll have a happy retirement!

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  19. I'm glad she's with you.

    Love,
    Janie

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  20. A much, much better life to come. A life - as opposed to an existence.

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  21. Anonymous7:27 pm

    Sometimes I wish I was one of those people who doesn't give a shit about animals. :( Bless her sweet little heart...yours too, John.

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  22. Oh my gosh, that poem really tugs at my heartstrings. Since learning about battery hens back when I got my chickens about four years ago, I've always wanted to adopt some. I've found that it is huge across the pond, but here in the US I haven't really found any way to adopt some. I am so glad you got this girl and she will get to actually be a chicken!

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  23. You're wonderful and I bet she'll have a wonderful retirement with you. xx

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  24. Anonymous8:30 pm

    Just a little more pressure on the waverers who haven't stopped buying cage eggs and barn eggs.

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    1. Andrew.....I have never had an ex battery hen right from the factory
      This hen was adopted by a lovely lady a couple of years ago, who looked after her very well...I have only got her because she is the only hen left of the flock

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  25. oh how nice for her (and all of you!)

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  26. Take good care of her, John. And stop making me reach for the tissue.

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  27. Wow, she must think she's in hen heaven. Her name? x

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  28. I thought battery farms were supposed to be phased out by now. I'm glad she has a new home.

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    1. They are AJ
      BUT INTENSIVE farming methods still exist is. Slightly different forms

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    2. So are 'barn' eggs not a good thing? I have to admit to being confused about exactly what I buy these days, what with all the different definitions on stuff.

      I'm not neurotic about farm conditions, but I do like to think that the animals are not badly treated. (I do know the difference between 'free range' and 'corn fed' when it comes to the meat question, even if some people in our local Tesco don't seem to.)

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  29. i am very glad that she is with you guys! you just started following me...so i did the same. there is a bunch of stuff on this blog that i will surely enjoy! i think you found me through 1st Man's blog...and i love him to death...even when he is showing off his mudroom sink - bahahahah! i am very glad to find a new blog to learn from...and Wales has always been a place that i have wanted to visit. my travelling days are over - i have been to enough places and am finally home. but i don't follow any Welsh blogs - so this is a bonus for me! thank you for stopping by and commenting - now i can live vicariously through you and your partner! your "about me" says that you have been together for 13 years - me and my man will have 13 yrs this january. it is such a blessing in life to have a partner that you love and be in a place that brings solace to your soul. from my quick glance at several of your blog posts - i know that you know what i am talking about! i will go back and read through all of your blog posts over the next few days. i love meeting new friends from blogs...i love learning about different people and their views and perspectives. thank you for leaving a comment on our blog...we really appreciate it!

    your new friend,
    kymber
    (from framboise manor)
    (p.s. - do you want to exchange links? let me know and i will add you to our blogroll. the people on our blogroll are preppers, survivalists, nutjobs, interesting people, people who live in the city, suburbs or country, people who wear tinfoil hats, people with guns, people who hate guns, people who love, people who laugh, people who are genuine. yep, i think that covers them all. i am very particular about who i put on our blogroll...but i think if you were there, more people could learn things about things. make sense? let me know if you want to exchange links.)

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    1. Kymber
      Hello there. Nice to have you aboard,,, and lovely to have a l o n g comment
      And from one that lives in a manor house.....hello!
      When I have a minute , I will pop over to yours..... It's a bit busy over here at the moment....FLOWER SHOW preparations take taking up all my time
      Jx

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  30. Now she is one lucky hen! Imagine living out her days at your place!! Heaven!
    What a cruel life these hens live....all the more reason to only buy/eat free range.

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  31. oh wow...bugerlugs won the hen lottery!

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  32. Ain't ya happy you're not a hen?

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  33. Good on you for taking her in, John. Will she be with Rooster Cogburn, or would she fit in better with the remaining Crackhead Whores?

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  34. Poor little girl - she is so lucky to be out of the cage!

    I've never read that poem before; I'm going to have to print it out. Did you write it?

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    1. Phyllis, Pam Ayres wrote The Battery Hen. Here it is in full at this link: http://club.omlet.co.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?t=84244&p=1154520
      Pam Ayres is a patron of the Battery Hen Welfare Trust.

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    2. She is also a bit of an expert when it come sto hens and geese

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  35. Anonymous1:14 am

    Lucky chicken. What in the world does bugerlugs mean? (If it means anything.)

    Janet

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  36. Poignant poem and one I can particularly relate to having grown up on a farm and having a soft spot for animals. I don't know that growing up on a farm had anything to do with the soft spot but it didn't hurt.

    It does hurt to think how these animals are treated.

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  37. Battery farms should have been banned long, long ago. Good on you for making what remains of this little fellows life a good one.

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  38. All of us who keep hens should adopt a few.

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  39. Have a sweet retirement little hen x

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  40. That chicken just doesn't know how lucky she is...

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  41. Great poem, but sad. That is one lucky chicken!

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  42. Happy retirement Bugerlugs - you've picked a good rest home xx

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