Ablutions

The cottage is a little crowded at the moment. Father in law is visiting for a week, so there are minor but not drastic hold ups with passing on the stairs and with the bathroom.
This morning was a case in point.
While I was collecting yesterday's eggs and setting up the feeders early doors, I was " caught short" with my early morning need for a " number two".... Now I could have ambled my way over to the cottage to face the possibility of the inevitable queue for the bog, or I could throw caution to the wind , sneak behind the goose house and have a crafty dump in the dawn sun.
I chose the latter
Now, I don't know if any reader will have experienced this, but squatting in what is effectively a farmyard environment can be fraught with  difficulty.
Firstly, every animal for a hundred yards, will see you doing something that they have not witnessed before and so will amble over to see if the activity involves food
And secondly when they eventually " get there" they seem overly fascinated with the " processes" that are afoot.
Seconds after I started , I counted 14 chickens, all of the geese, Bingley, one brave Indian runner and both  sheep standing in a rough semicircle around me . I couldn't have  brought more attention to myself if I had waved a Welsh Flag on a long pole and sang " calon lan" at the top of my voice
Thank goodness I don't suffer from constipation

I was all done and dusted before the rest of the duck flock and the cockerel stragglers appeared.