Thursday, 17 January 2013

An Apology

Well, when you write a blog, not everyone will be happy with what you have to say.
Such is the nature of the beast.
In  yesterday's blog I talked about families ( amongst other things) who have been attracted to some of the housing estates in the village. I mentioned that they perhaps remain noticeably separate to the community in which they live, a fact which seems a factor of modern day life.
Unfortunately I mentioned one area in particular, and this fact upset someone who lives there and who has been part of village life for decades. For this upset, I am very sorry, on reflection the naming of one area over another was always going to be somewhat ill advised.
With me banging on about how people should invest in their communities, it was certainly not my intention to alienate villagers who quite clearly "make the effort "

I guess there is always an exception that disproves the rule so to speak and
I hope my words on village survival will resonate with all members of our small community
Hey ho

41 comments:

  1. Anonymous5:01 pm

    Thank you

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    1. You are very welcome indeed

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    2. 200 years of Public Relations, gone in a second. Think on and abide, I say.

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  2. Some days it's just not safe to speak your mind and the most innocent of comments can cause endless grief. Mayhap folks are just a little over sensitive these days.

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  3. Sorry that your comments upset some people. Unfortunately, when you have an opinion, that usually happens. You are handling it well, so good for you :)

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  4. I love that you apologized in such a public way. I hold people that can apologize after making mistake, it shows that you have integrity. And I prize integrity in a person.
    Well done.

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    1. This is very nice, Kelly! I agree!

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  5. You are a gent ,through and through.
    Jane xx

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  6. I have an uncanny knack for upsetting people with things I write. I've given up on offering apologies - - but "Bravo" to you for being so noble!

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  7. Hey John, you made a valid point about community spirit and increasingly the lack of it. Then this person pops up proving that even though the fire appears to have decayed to ash, there is still that little ember from which one can draw a flame of hope. I hope the two of you become/remain the best of friends and continue be stalwart members of your thriving community (whichever part of the village you live in!)

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  8. As you say, John, there are always exceptions. At my last location, where we had any number of impersonal developments arise, many were loaded with families who had no desire to be part of the community. But in every one, there was at least one or two families who wanted to take part in the community around them and participate in local events or start new ones.

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  9. Anonymous7:14 pm

    It's a blog for crying out loud!!!! I for one, appreciate everything you say because it is YOUR blog.

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  10. Very cool blog. Interesting posts. ;)
    Nice atmosphere guests with you here on the blog. ;]
    Yours. Have a nice day. !

    Follow me on facebook fanpage
    I'm very concerned about this, please. :)
    https://www.facebook.com/pages/In-another-light/413836138693856

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  11. Hi John, firstly apologies for the lateness of my wishing you a very happy new year, but I hope the next 12 months prove to be successful both at home and work and I am sure that there are MANY new members added to your troupe to come....A bit like Elton and Dave but with animals and muck!

    As for the expressing of an opinion, we all have the right to one, though it doesn't mean its the right one and to change ones view is what makes us civilised. On the other hand if we can see evidence to support our view then we have the right to keep it, however to express it knowing it causes pain to another is when we need to consider to speak or remain silent for both their peace of mind and ours.
    Some one once said that opinions are like grandparents...if you get to 40 and still have 4 then you are doing well!

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    1. And a happy new year to you

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  12. Anyone who knows you, John, or reads your blog must know you don't have a malicious bone in your body. A bumble now and then (as do we all). But malice? You? Never.

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  13. In my county (in California) there is a development company that specializes in procuring farm land, by some sort of underhand method, and building city type housing in the middle of rural communities. At first I thought our rural area might prosper by having some new people, but this hasn't happened. They don't even send their kids to our schools, they have completely separate lives that don't involve 4-H or FFA, or any of our rural activities. They don't buy tickets to our functions or support anything, they haul their kids to private schools in town, they only sleep in their houses. Maybe someday they'll actually become part of our community, but mostly they like to complain about dust, animal noises, and crop dusters. So if there was one person in YOUR local new development who actually cares enough to complain to you, I consider you lucky.

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  14. It takes a person of courage to apologise if they have inadvertently caused upset,and you, John, are a man of courage. You continue to speak your mind, and let no other person make you relapse into silence. x

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  15. Oh John, I have had to make an apology to a friend who read ( read as in the past ) my blog. We are not perfect.

    I have just deleated facebook because of all the showing off / bragging and slagging that goes on daily.

    In every day life we unintentionally upset people - it's bound to happen here too.

    Oh I had to laugh at the above comment from Patrycja !

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  16. I agree with Jan Blawat, as I also live in California. When we moved to our rural area, there were milk cows. Now there are luxury houses. You were absolutely spot on to talk about this issue.

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  17. You can't please everyone - if you tread on "toes" they may have been too close to the "problem". IMHO

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  18. Seeing as how I speak in 'maaaa' and am often misunderstood I sympathise with the problem. . When we write it is so difficult to completely understand the tone of a post since readers cannot see our facial expressions or here our voices. I think you do very, very well in expressing yourself, John. xoxoxo

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  19. You can please some of the people all the time, and all the people some of the time, but not all the people all the time.

    I'm sure your apology will be suitable amends for an unintentional slight....

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  20. Life is short. Apologies are good. And you...are a fine man indeed.

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  21. FFS! do they not realize that you didn't mean LITERALLY everyone from their community?

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  22. Any feedback from the polar bear yet....?

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  23. Ah John Gray,

    To be honest. Man, I hate that expression, "to be honest", to be honest. Anyway, it seems your words in that posting must not have meant any ill feeling.

    Which reminds me, about time I got back to Wales. My friends in Cardigan, as in the town, must be missing me badly.

    Respect and goodwill,

    Gary

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  24. Don't be too hard on yourself. You meant no harm, and your apology was heartfelt.

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    1. I am not heard on myself dear sue.....I stand by my words... I am just sorry the person was upset by them

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  25. You're human. We're all human. You apologized and that says enough.
    Have a wonderful weekend, John!
    *hugs* ♥

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  26. They'll get over it.

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  27. I hope he gets over the slight but you apologized and that should be enough. He now needs to move on.

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  28. I don't think you were being controversial at all. It's much the same in all small communities, when a new estate is built on the outskirts. They form their own community, as they have more in common with each other than they do with the rest of the village. I don't see anything wrong with this, and given time they will surely integrate.

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  29. - What a lovely part of the world you live in! Amazing. I wish we had villages here in the U.S. Its all so developed here with cookie cutter communities.

    Good luck with planning your fete this year! Happy 2013!!

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  30. @Tom: Speaking exclusively to Sky News outside his rustic cottage in the Welsh countryside, Mr Gray (39) explained that he "Was going to spend more time with his poultry".

    @mybabyjohn/Delores: Yes, I absolutely agree. Yes, perhaps a little unwise to mention a whole estate, but I think John's general sentiment WAS correct.

    The issues are complex, and have more to do with the immense emphasis given (by politicians, and a narrow group of middle-class voters) on "the family" today, and not the communities they live in.

    The current British Gas advertisement on TV sums this up neatly. With the strapline "protecting your world" it shows "families" (i.e. obligatory wife/husband and two kids) isolating themselves from their neighbours.

    These messages are powerful. They incite people to think of their communities as collections of nuclear - and not extended - families. It's an insidious aspect of modern life in the 'developed' West, unfortunately.

    I don't think we should wholly blame people for acting this way. They are incited to think/act in this way by politicians, corporations and the media. Perhaps, like in my neighbourhood recently, it will take an "incident" to break people out of their safe little hetero-normal worlds and take some time to talk to other people.

    Nx


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  31. I feel I'm treading on eggshells sometimes when I write a blog post. Oh hell, better be carefull, maybe someone won't like what I say, shall I tone it down, shall I delete it altogether? Someone recently had a go at me because I said I can manage perfectly well on my pension, being frugal with the heating and eating. It was pointed out to me that not everyone is blessed with good health as I am, some people are chronically sick and need the heating on all day and they are struggling to pay for it. Well, blimey, what am I supposed to do about that? Your blog is always interesting and entertaining, don't change anything.

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  32. I don't think you should have apologised, if people can't take the truth then that's their problem not yours. I'm a recent follower and am enjoying every one of your posts, hey - this is your blog, and you can say what you like.

    Having said that, I too used to live in a small intimate village and well understand how difficult it can be if someone 'takes against you'
    but I hope you will keep blogging in your own unique style.

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    1. Thanks chuck....sometimes oil has to be thrown on the waters

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  33. Ain't life like that?!! You set out in a spirit of complete good will, without the slightest intention of offending anyone, and someone takes offence. All you can do in that situation is be true to yourself. Goodness wins is my theory!

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