I was only posting a comment this morning about being caught in my underpants in the kitchen by a lady looking through our kitchen window from her overly large 4 x 4 and BINGO a couple of hours later what happened?
Yes I was caught parading around in my underpants by a lady who was this time, riding her horse in the lane!
 |
| The kitchen window that used to be a door |
The reason for me showing off my budgie smugglers was the fact that Bingley had flexed his testosterone muscles as I was lifting the Blind Rooster Cogburn out of his pen and kararte kicked me from behind!
Within a second he had clawed through the fabric of my combat trousers and as I tried to kung fu him back , he managed to give me a sideward peck and actually RIPPED my Walking Dead T shirt RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE!
 |
| Pants! |
 |
| T shirt!!!!!!!!!!!! |
I was livid!......After putting Rooster C ( who was crowing lustily with the drama of it all) back into his run, I ran after the rapidly retreating Bingley and gave him a quick boot up the arse before retiring to the kitchen to check my injuries!
This is when I was caught by a lady rider standing in my undies in front of the kitchen window!
Cheap Thrills for her!
Irritation and resignation for me!
hey ho
********************************************************************************
Weight Watchers weigh in this morning 14 stone 5 lbs
Weight Loss last week 2lbs
Total weight Loss since Jan 1st 1 stone 9 lbs
That's a great excuse. It's right in line with "I was hoovering the lounge after having a bath when I fell and it got sucked into the pipe"!
ReplyDeleteYou should have charged her for the show!
ReplyDeletem.
I have this sneaky feeling you wander around in your "budgie smugglers" more than you care to admit.
ReplyDeleteThat's OK we're all friends in here :)
Sorry about your shirt, maybe one of the villager ladies could darn it for you ?
Bad Bingly.
~Jo
Well done on the weight loss....
ReplyDeleteBrilliant excuses btw as to why half the female population of the village have seen you in your underpants - really impressed with how quick you can make a story like that up ;-)
Bingley would be roasting by now, if it were me. The point with having these animals is enjoyment not learning self-defense. Off to the butcher, I say...unless you are enjoying the ladies looking...Bingley can remain your excuse.
ReplyDelete"And that is case for the defence m'lud."
ReplyDeleteSome turkeys just don't appreciate what they have. I'd be introducing him to a large roasting pan.
ReplyDeleteAfter loosing all that weight, let's hope your underpants don't fall down as someone is passing the window!
ReplyDeleteI bet George Formby would add another verse of two...
ReplyDeletelife lesson to Bingley: don't bite the hand that feeds you
ReplyDelete'Combat' trousers sound right for the job!
ReplyDeleteMy, my, mayhem in Trelawnyd.
ReplyDeleteNot the days-of-the-week ones?
ReplyDeleteJohn, Love.... you may want to add a 'D' to the "staning in my undies" line .... ;)
ReplyDeleteIf they look through your window, they have it coming to them.
ReplyDeleteYou can tell everyone that the walking dead got to your t-shirt.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear that Bingley saw you as a target. Bad Bingley.
One of my hockey teammates at my old location raised emus and wore her hockey gear when she had to deal with them.
megan
Forgot to add, congrats on the continued weight loss!
ReplyDeletemegan
You're not too old for the "ripped" look, you trendy young thang
ReplyDeleteHaha. Sorry. I agree with Gail. Time to have Bingley for dinner. ;o)
ReplyDeleteNone the worse for wear, I take it?
Have a good afternoon, John. :o)
Oh poor John! I'm glad you didn't get hurt (other than your pants and T-shirt...especially THE t-shirt). I kind of wish I had been over the church fence viewing all this drama....especially your Karate kick ;) Budgie smugglers..hmm.
ReplyDeleteHope the rest of your day is better.
Maura :)
Do you know the lady on the horse?
ReplyDeleteJane x
Well John, when you are walking talking turkey wrestling sex machine...what do you expect?
ReplyDeleteJane
ReplyDeleteYes, but not by name !
oh John not your Walking Dead T Shirt?!!!! Can you mend it or is it totaled?
ReplyDeleteI figure anyone taking a look see in your kitchen window gets to see what they see!
Look at it this way John. Your walking dead t-shirt is probably more authentic looking, your combats are battle fatigues so ditto, and as for marching around the house in your pants - I thought you did that anyway?
ReplyDeleteJust a normal sunny day in Trelawnyd!
How thoughtful of you to provide the fair ladies of Trelawnyd with a bit of excitement to gossip about! You are such a kind and generous man.
ReplyDeleteI have to admit, I think Bingley would have seen his last day if he were my bird...
They will have to add some new characters to Walking Dead next season. I must say I'm glad they got rid of Shane. He was really getting on my nerves.
ReplyDelete(How come I can't get Going Gently added to my blog list? I see that Cro Magnon shows it on his list of blogs he follows.)
I had no idea Trelawnyd was such a hotbed of lust and scantily-clad gentlemen. Some more warning signs are clearly called-for on the village outskirts.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletePerhaps you can pose for a future vintage gardening poster sunday?
ReplyDeleteOK i have to ask, was she just stopped there looking in like a sex crazed perv, or was it just a "ride by flashing"??
Congrats on the weight loss!! I have been trying to lose 2 lbs for a month. What are you eating?? I suppose my G&T's and vino aren't helping matters.
ReplyDeleteSounds like maybe you need to wear some combat protection gear when you go out to the barnyard.
The old weight is coming off nicely John.
ReplyDeleteYou will gain a reputation and the ladies of the village will be queueing up to take in the view.
pat.. that wont give me a smile! ( nor will it make their day too!)
ReplyDeleteNever mind cheap thrills for Jilly Cooper, John, if he'd have been mine and did that he'd have been two pecks away from the roasting tin.
ReplyDelete'Budgie smugglers' I might have to use that one myself someday, but God knows when or how.
ReplyDeleteWay to go on the weight loss, John. Almost a 10lb bag of taters gone ! Wish I could say the same way over here. By the way, thanks for my "belly laugh" today, I needed to lighten up.
ReplyDeleteFine upstanding gentlemen - who chair village flower show committees - do not flash their Homer Simpson Y fronts at every passing member of the fairer sex. Nor do they make up outrageous excuses that cast blame directly upon dumb animals like Bingley...dumb animals that cannot defend themselves.Remember - "A Turkey is just for Christmas - not for life"...
ReplyDeleteOK John! That was a good story but what REALLY happened?! And what were you doing?! lol
ReplyDeleteOne of the seldom mentioned perks of life out in the sticks is the freedom to wander out to the clothesline for an article of clothing without having to prepare in advance. Of course, if ever we move back to town, I'll probably be arrested for indecent exposure before the week is out.
ReplyDeleteMaybe those ladies shouldn't be looking in ! How can they see through the net anyway ?
ReplyDeleteI was out on a forest walk with friends once when we came across a modern house with a lot of windows with a naked man inside ( he ought to mind the squirrels !)
Haven't stopped giggling about the comment on your last post about the Zombies being awfully slow and surely being able to out run them!
You could be an extra now with all that weight loss & ripped clothes !
Congratulations on the impressive weight loss!
ReplyDeleteI'm still trying to figure out what the lady rider was doing standing in your undies.
fanarrh!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the giggle - loved this.
ReplyDelete