Wednesday, 14 December 2016

In The Mood


It feels rather Christmasy this morning.
Bright and sunny with the sun low in the sky.
I dropped a natty Prof off at a local conferenc centre
He looked mighty fine in his best suit.
I was wearing my pyjama bottoms under my trousers.

On the way home, I stopped at the drive through to buy an egg muffin and coffee
The girl on the intercom was being playful
" what's your Christmas wish?" She asked
" World peace " I told her

It got me in the Christmas mood
Driving back I sang

" These three kings of orient are
Selling knickers a pound a pair
How fantastic!
No elastic!
Selling a pound a pair!"




55 comments:

  1. On the twelfth day of Christmas,
    My drive through gave to me:
    Twelve bags of Pepto,
    Eleven pounds of blubber,
    Ten baked potatoes,
    Nine Polish hot dogs,
    Eight bowls of chilli,
    Seven tubs of coleslaw,
    Six chocolate milkshakes,
    Five onion rings,
    Four Egg McMuffins,
    Three XL Fries,
    Two Happy Meals,
    and a Big Bacon Classic with cheese.

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    Replies
    1. you have created clever comments the past 2 days; keep up the good work, sir! :)

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    2. Lovely, but you forgot the scotch eggs.

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    3. I must confess that it's not entirely original. I just made a couple of changes.

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    4. Three Scotch Eggs? That would fit in nicely !

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  2. In the bleak mid winter
    John Gray made my day
    He's my Father Christmas
    And the dogs all pull the sleigh

    Albert finds the Christmas mouse
    Hidden in the snow
    In the bleak midwinter
    Lo-o-ong ago

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  3. And that's Bette in my favourite Christmas movie EVER!!!!

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    Replies
    1. The Man Who Came to Dinner! In my top 5, along with The Bishops Wife, Its a Wonderful life, The Polar Express and top of all Christmas Vacation!

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    2. I never thought I'd meet someone (virtually speaking) who had the same top 5 Christmas films as me...Hurrah!!

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  4. Not a rhyme I have heard before. Funny.

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  5. One on a scooter, blowing his hooter...

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  6. World peace is a very good thing to wish for!

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  7. that's our john - pj bottoms and crocs!

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  8. John, reading your blog and the comments makes me so happy in the mornings. Needed it especially today. Thanks :)

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  9. My second laugh of the morning, what a wonderful way to start the day.

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  10. LOL -- don't you mean "whirled peas"? Some people probably need knickers with no elastic. :)

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  11. I learned this version as a child:
    We three kings of orient are
    Trying to smoke a rubber cigar
    It was loaded and exploded.
    We two kings of orient are....
    Xoxo
    Barbara

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    Replies
    1. Cracking! More bastardized hymns please

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  12. I always ask for World Peace--sadly, I'm still waiting--but I'll take a Bette Davis movie in the meantime.

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    Replies
    1. me too; and I ask for an end to hunger and h8 and bigotry and never get those either.

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  13. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8XKEvClA-k

    This should put anyone in a good mood ...

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  14. I woke up with a Bette Davis mood today, and it's not for sissies.

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    Replies
    1. That's my mood most days...

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  15. If I had one one-hundredth of your Christmas spirit I'd be a much happier human being.

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  16. Little donkey
    Little donkey
    On the M25
    Got run over, by a Rover
    Little donkey died

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  17. That's inflation for you. In my day those knickers were tuppence a pair. I blame decimalisation.

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    Replies
    1. Cheap knickers how unfortunate x

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  18. You'll have to catch me later, I woke with a headache ...

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  19. The one we used to sing -
    We Three Kings of Orient are,
    One in a taxi, one in a car
    One on a scooter blowing his hooter,
    Going to Potter's Bar !

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  20. I always liked the kids' version of "Silent Night," changing "..round yon virgin mother and child" to "..round John Virgin, mother and child."

    My daughter when she was little used to sing Jose Feliciano's "Feliz Navidad" as "Feliz Blobby-blob" because that's what it sounded like to her.

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  21. We should have a contest.....rewording of traditional Christmas songs...who can get the biggest laugh.

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  22. The next verse:-

    Oh star of wonder, star of light,
    Charlie caught his pants alight
    He went screaming through the ceiling
    wasn't a very pretty sight.

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  23. Here's one from New Yorker magazine that I copied to my blog in 2014:

    A Climate Change Christmas Carol

    Silent Night

    Endless night!

    All is dark, there’s no light.

    Cyclone clouds have blocked out the sky,

    We’re almost out of our dry-meat supply.

    Sleep in uneasy peace.

    (We may have to eat Aunt Bernice.)

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    Replies
    1. Hey that must be a rarity! Fantastic

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  24. Almost fifty years ago my son was at Lichfield Cathedral School. He wasn't a choir boy but of course had his lessons with them. One year one of the carols they practised for the Christmas service was 'The Angel Gabriel from Heaven came.....' The last line of the first verse being 'most highly favoured lady - Gloria'
    To a man they all sang 'most highly flavoured lady - strawberry' and got a flea in their collective ears afterwards.

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  25. Get on Youtube and check out Kevin Bloody Wilson's 'Hey Santa Claus'. When you've recovered, try a few Bob Rivers songs like 'Yellow snow' and 'Chipmunks roasting on an open fire' :-)

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    Replies
    1. Just have......bloody marvellous

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  26. Simon Mayo, DJ, used to play a brilliant version of "Walking in a Winter Wonderland", changed to "Walking round in Womens underwear". It had lines like " Later on, if you wanna, we can dress like Madonna" and "Wearing her clothes, silk pantyhose" me and the hubster cried laughing when we first heard it.

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    Replies
    1. Another Bob Rivers classic

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    2. I found some Bob Rivers stuff on youtube, I was in tears of laughter, brilliant!

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  27. To the tune of Good King Wenceslas:
    Rebecca does revolting farts
    The stink is quite disgusting
    There's no let-up once she starts
    Especially when she's dusting

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  28. Look up jingle bells shot gun shells

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  29. You are simply precious...and funnnny!

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  30. Look up jingle bells shot gun shells

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  31. It went from winter chills to autumn breezes, so I can't say it feels like Christmas but feeling like Christmas is a hard thing to define in the southern United States

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  32. Only you . . .
    can bring out rhyme and silliness
    from "the troops" . . .
    and throw in a world peace line to boot . . .

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  33. but if you take that equal 5'nine" huge boned frame and put it in a bikini weighing in at among one hundred forty to 160 lbs that can happen. http://musclegainfast.com/leanfire-xt-reviews/

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  34. I've only ever heard, We three kings of Orient are... smoking on a rubber cigar... I like your version better.

    If you had the time to put on your trousers, couldn't you have slipped off the pyjama bottoms first?

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