Chuckle

January has left with a bit of whimper and for me it’s been good riddance to bad rubbish.

I still feel lethargic and a little “ out of sorts” but already I can feel the afternoons  are lighter just a little bit longer. 

There is hope in the air. 

I am on my last night of three, and my recent  night at the cinema before nights reminded me that I was human and benefitted for a change of scene. 

Monday is the village Pub quiz and I’ve arranged to go with affable despot Jason. 

And the velvet voiced Linda has given me the most gentle of kicks-the-arse to sort of a Trelawnyd Productions meeting the week after next.

The older you get, the closer physical wellness affects psychological wellness. This, for me is compounded by the time of year and social isolation .

Everything is enmeshed and feels somewhat complicated.

My head and thinking is fuzzy

It’s not rocket science , 

Just one step in front of the other, and start ticking the mental list off.

I know I’m coming out of “ something”

Whatever something is ?

For when I helped a patient to stand up and he fearfully held me close grabbing my uniform I relaxed the tension in the moment by reminding him “ we are not engaged as yet” and that he had to buy me a gin and tonic first before I would even think about it” 

My head wants and needs to laugh 

In January I think everyone’s do

Moira Rose Confronts

One of my favourite actresses died yesterday. Catherine O’Hara was a gifted comic and actress. She stole more scenes than lassie in her time and when in her sixties, forged out a new following by creating the amazing character of  MoiraRose in Schitt’s Creek.

She will be missed

28 Years Later

The second film in the third franchise of 28 Years Later has breathed some new energy and life into the story of infected zombie types and the feral well in post apocalyptic Britain. 

Now we have the car crash drama where the Jimmy Saville look-a-like killer group headed by the dim but manipulative Jimmy ( Jack O’Connell) finally meet up to the unhinged but ultimately benign Robinson Crusoe Dr Ian Kelson ( Ralph Fiennes) and his Man Friday Infected Alpha ( an extraordinary powerful performance by Chi Lewis Parry. Don’t forget we have Spike (Alfie Williams ) from the first movie who is reluctantly conscripted into the psychopathic group and Kelly (Erin Kellyman) a fellow member who shows some much welcomed empathy, so the scene is set for a violent ( and too violent to be honest) sequel that keeps you on the edge of your seat. 

Not an easy watch , but an interesting film with Fiennes on spectacular form 

Janet hated it 

Chi Lewis Parry, a strangely attractive “ zombie”

 

Love Matters - Grupo Talía

I’m pretty good in a medical emergency. 43 years of experience helps somewhat I guess. Today I had to deal with someone  who apparently overdosed on antidepressants which necessitated an admission to the ER. 

A calm head and a no challenge attitude is vital here.

Someone has to take charge, direct the action and and give the right degree of support, think of Colour Sergeant Bourne ( Nigel Bruce) from Zulu crossed with  Dr Lazarus ( Frances Sternhagen ) from Outland 

Firm fair and humorous.

And never EVER  look worried 

I was supposed to go to the cinema tonight but got home too late

I ended up sharing a scotch egg with Mary in front of the fire

Mary

Mary’s official passport photo taken by Cameron 7 years ago

 She has progressive heart failure 

The Spanish Vet told me nothing I didn’t know. 

Mary sat blinking between us her cataracts evident under the surgery lights and she coughed heavily on cue

We talked about options and settled for medication only 

Take her home and love her the vet suggested

We were out of the door before she had finished her speech.

Roger tottering dutifully behind, fully aware of the seriousness of the visit.

I met Chic Eleanor for lunch and before we parted she asked me what was bothering me

I told her about Mary as she busied herself rearranging my scarf and before I could make light of things she wrapped her arms around my neck in a hug which almost broke my heart in its care.

Darling man I so understand she said 

🎤🎶 ESA DIVA- Grupo Talia

The lisping choir is on good form today. ( I was in the audience for this one) 

I took the Welsh to the beach , had avocado on toast for lunch and collected logs.

Not an exciting day, but one enlivened by a very loud cashier at Marks who bellowed across the cafe that my debit card had been rejected. ( it hadn’t, it just requested the pin as an extra security measure) but  that didn’t stop the group of grey hairs ooohhhing and arrrhhhhhing  in hushed tones together as I schelpped my walk of shame back to the pay desk

I only got one blob of egg and a single streak of avocado down my jumper today 

I FaceTimed the German and he pointed the fact out all the way from Hintertupfingen 

Watchman

 

In 1989 I had never looked after an orthodox Jewish patient, let alone supervised the care of one recently deceased. My patient had a large extended family with various male spokesmen who centred their interactions with the one male doctor on duty as well as myself. 

As a gauche young man and an inexperienced nurse, I knew enough to be respectful and open to the family’s needs and was introduced to Benesh just before my patient died. 

Benesh was a Shomer . A mature Jewish man of faith and seriousness, who had been asked to attend as a watchman over my patient from death to burial. He was quiet and respectful, but was keen to explain his role to me as I provided a link with the clinical side of the ward.

He explained his job of reciting Tehillim ( psalms ) as he physically guarded the void , left by the departing soul. His patient was therefore not abandoned in anyway, and I remember feeling the power of the support quietly being emitted by these respectful young men as they went along with their work.

Is there anything else I should be doing ? 

I remember asking Benesh as I entered the single ward.

Be quiet and deliberate and respectful he said with a smile and in my 60s that respect for stillness and tradition remains with me .

It shows in a need for an unhurried  quietness which seems innate and normal to me.

I saw God on the train

I love this poem by Lucas Jones. Its pace and masculinity and power and rawness is refreshing. Last night of three this week, and I’m eating beef stew . The Welsh are at Trendy Carol’s and I’ve realised , yet again, I have nothing much to say. 

I hope this changes tomorrow