" Out Of The Mouth Of.........".

I was on the school pick up yesterday, so took Winnie down to the school gates at three pm. I always take one of the dogs, so I don't look like a pervert to those parents who don't know me.
Six year old Liv is always out first and seconds after we have the usual diva greetings she and her classmates were rubbing chubby hands all over Winnie's body.
" Feel her nipples" Liv gave her instructions to two little boys " that's where she fed her babies"
" They are called udders" one of the boys said very seriously as he crouched down to have a better look, the other boy was busy poking his finger into the folds of Winnie's face wrinkles .
I became slightly worried when another little girl bounced up and started to rub Winnie's bottom, but the old bulldog lapped up the attention like a sponge.
" They are called teats!" I told the children as the nipple inspection continued and they all burst out laughing...

Liv, Winnie and I then waited for older sister Eve to get out of the senior class and together we went back to the cottage. Both girls pointed at the ceramic egg in the garden and after I shouted out that it was a genuine dinosaur egg they chorused " YOU LIE!" 
It's a game we play.

Yesterday I had two activities planned. The girls were asked to design several greetings card ( Including a Birthday card for the Prof) then we made zombie gingerbread men which were hot out of the oven by the time affable despot Jason was knocking at the cottage window ready to pick them up.

Gingerbread Zombies

Great fun...will tell you about this tomorrow

Sometimes We All Need A Sneaky Sausage!

Just as the planets spin around the central axis of the sun, the cottage animals seem to circle and re circle the constant anchor of an ageing Scottish terrier.
This morning was a case in point.
Albert shot through the kitchen followed by Mary and Winnie and legged it up the stairs amid a hammering of paws on floorboards. Moments later they all reappeared together , this time with William in tow and the group flowed through the kitchen door then back again like a hairy tidal wave.
This is a normal event  when the sun shines and the cottage is airing .
Even I am pottering around back and forth, as I search for a craft folder full of odds and ends...I am picking up Liv and Eve from school today and I want them to design some greetings cards

George is the only one still and quiet.

I hoover the house with Mary angrily barking at the hoover nozzle,and William yaps at the garden gate as Pippa tries to sneak past the cottage with her bad tempered Meg. By this time Winnie is snoring loudly in the arm chair and Albert has put his head in the dumpling mix I have left in a bowl on the kitchen table.
The electricity meter reader knocks on the front window and the cottage bursts back into more confusion and noise . It's the kind of situation when the Professor will often bellow out a lusty
" I can't stand this !" Remark, not understanding that he is indeed adding to the confusion.

Only George is still watching the mayhem from his quiet place on the couch.

I catch The goo goo eyed Mary and put her and William on their leads in readiness for their two mile march around the village . Winnie snores her bulldog snores as Albert stalks off to bed, and I retrieve a left over sausage from the fridge and drop it into George's lap before we leave .

There's got to be some compensation for being the calm eye of the storm.

Old George

A Pain In The Glass

I met two people in the village this morning . One chap I know fairly well, he's the owner of Podrick the black Labrador puppy, who at only a few months old is already a beautifully trained sweetheart.
The other chap I didn't know at all, he was walking back from the garage shop with a newspaper.
Both men mentioned the blog.
Podrick's owner was tickled pink, that at puppy class in the village of Ffynnongroew ( go on you Americans try pronouncing that  one!) a woman had recognised his dog from my blog, whilst the other chap stopped to tell me that his wife had found Going Gently and had found something funny in it.
I know that some locals read it to catch up on the local news......perhaps that's a reflection that we no longer have a village centre shop anymore . Who knows.
If the chap with the newspaper pops in here today, he won't find too much to laugh about although Mandy from next door did catch me feeding the sheep in my pyjamas this morning......I don't know how I did it but they were inside out so the pockets ( yes they have pockets) were flapping around my hips like elephant's ears. She's used to such sights so barely gave me a second glance.....I still had my pyjamas on under my trousers when I met the villagers .....but I don't care...
  I've been spending my time organising the kitchen cupboards again......
...The kitchen is a tip and from time to time a girl just has to pull himself up by the bra straps and take control.
There's two of us in the house so why oh why do we have hundreds of drinking glasses?
I've just bleached, cleaned, sorted and polished hundreds of the little buggers

Same with the food cupboard....I've just found a packed of lasagna dated 1998 as well as a tin of baked beans which probably got sold when Harold Wilson was still puffing his pipe.
So organisation and streamlining is the order of the day.....as well as lots of coffee and good radio.
Friday I am ordering the new kitchen flooring......then we'll really have a kitchen fit for Mary Berry

The Walking Dead Review (Spoiler)- The Next World

Well a supplement blog entry just for me and a few die hard Walking Dead fans.....

Michonne and Rick 

Finally, a bit of lightness hits the show weeks after the Anderson family got chomped on at the fall of Alexandria, .Rick and Daryl go all bromance and have a jousting adventure with the new bright and wily opportunist Jesus. Tara and lumpy likeable doctor Denise are now an item ( though Denise let slip that Tara is off on a supply run for two weeks - ohh no!), Enid and Carl play at being moody teens, Spencer gets some closure when he finds his walker mother and alpha female Michonne, finally gets jiggy jiggy with her mirror alpha predator Rick.( a fact that has been three series in the making)
Sex and the zombie apocalypse has strangely been thin on the ground for most of the characters in The Walking Dead....a fact that has always surprised me somewhat given the " this could be our last night on earth" mentality of the show.......
I'm surprised that they all haven't been shagging like rabbits..
Nice to see a change of pace for one episode at least!
Daryl's scenes with Jesus were especially bouncy .....watch that space! There's a connection there!

Mantelpiece

Bloody Hell I'm knackered. Night shift was particularly busy last night.
I've been finding it a little hard getting going today......so I shall be brief.

This is our mantelpiece. I love cards and postcards on mantelpieces. Getting correspondence through the mail seems to be a rarity nowadays what with the internet and texts, but , for me it remains a bit of a treat.
On show we have two birthday party invitations ( one in the village Hall and one in a posh London venue) , a sweet card from a friend in Derbyshire which accompanied a box of coffee, our valentine's cards ( mine is more classy) and a postcard from Spain, a greeting from one of our Flower Show committee members who has emigrated to a warmer life.
A hand written card, placed in an envelope and stamped and Posted takes more of an effort than thumbs on a phone keypad or fingers on an email
It says you're worth it.........

Sunday Thoughts

Cottage Still life

" Bulldog and fire with daffs"

I'm doing a Rachel  today as I have got 12 minutes in which to type this post .
Lunch goes into the cooker at 12.40
Today it' s Waitrose salmon........(we went yesterday and I got all excited at the pristine conditions and the polite non sports wearing customers.)
Sunday lunchtime is my favourite time of the week. The Prof is in church, the dogs all asleep after walks and breakfast and the cottage is silent.
It always feels a little like Christmas morning before the action starts.
Today I walked around the Marian with William and Mary. There is a cottage up on the hill, where an Alsatian lives, it attacked the terriers last week and got booted by me for it's trouble and I was going " to have a word" with the owner  but was stopped short.
The owner is having a bad time at the moment.
He recognised me the other day and stopped for a sad chat. He recognised me from visiting the hospital. Unshaven and tired , he is coping with illness at home, so the security of a maladjusted dog is the last thing on his mind.
How quickly can a life change.
Our meeting unsettled me somewhat. A Sudden and devastating illness is not a rarity in people of middle years, we only have a pack of dogs, a cat with a bent leg, scruffy sheep, and a motley crew of birds because I am in the position of caring for them. The worry of " what will become of my children if I am ill? " is sadly not the prerogative of just the modern parents of this world....

Hey ho.

Darn it...I am one minute over ...........need to go that salmon won't cook itself xxxx

Tit

What's Happened today?

Lovely lunch out in Chester,

 Bit of shopping

Got home

Walked dogs into churchyard to see alpacas in church glebe

Spied that Gaynor Mad organist was pottering alone in the church

Got a bit silly , put anorak hood way over head, pressed head against vestry window

Made loud moaning noises and scratched fingers on window

( pretending to be a zombie)

carried on like this for a good minute or so, 

Until a loud cough brought me up short

Apologised profusely  to two ladies who suddenly appeared walking down Church path