When Was The Last Time Someone Flirted With You?

Yesterday we were returning " an item" to Marks & Spencer when the salesman kept presenting me with paperclips that had been attached to the sales receipts.
I was a bit perplexed by these theatrics and as we walked away with a credit note I  asked Chris
" what was all that about?"
Chris raised his Roger Moore right eyebrow in amusement
" He was flirting with you" he said somewhat drily.

Well I was made up!
Even though I hadn't got a clue what had occurred it is always nice to think someone may have made the effort to flirt with me, even though it was through the medium of a bent paperclip!

Who was the last person that flirted with you?
Answers on a postcard please.....

Badger Paw

The shop assistant was called Emma and she was very sweet

She looked at Chris' wedding finger and guessed correctly that he was a " S "  fit

He has the long slim hands of a piano player

Having said that he did get the wedding band stuck on his finger for a while

until Emma said quietly and without fuss

" the secret is not to panic and wiggle the ring to get it off" 

Of course she was right.

Chris waggled it and it slipped right off

Then she looked at my stubby fat fingers and said diplomatically 

" I think we'll try a " V" to start with

I can't help having fat hands

They look like badger's paws!

Early Doors

Tonight we went to the pub for early doors......it's something we never generally do.......
How exciting!
We thrashed out the seating plan for the wedding dinner.....and agreed that our friend John ( Bel Ami)  may well like to read something out at the ceremony. ( he's appeared on radio 4 's " Women's Hour" so IS a consummate professional when it comes to " do's")........I've already asked My best friend Nuala to say something and Chris' Brother will speak for his family......so I think we have all bases covered......
It's been rather fun planning everything .....and I am so glad the whole event is small and manageable .....so many weddings feed on themselves and get completely out of control........
Our wedding.......less is more........
Ps. I'm not used to drinking lager
Three pints and I had to have a crafty pee behind the Berlingo on the way home

How Others See you.....

Gale force winds and driving rain wasn't quite the welcome to 2015 I had in mind. At 4.30. It was pissing down , so I dug out my oversize green plastic hooded poncho and stood by the gate waiting for the last of the hens to make their way home.
With the wind whipping my cape, I thought I looked every inch of Meryl Streep in "The French Lieutenant's Woman"
Mysterious, ethereal and windswept.
The truth was somewhat different , for as the Son ( of the RFWF) went passed in his landrover, he noticed that the gales had " filled" the poncho and quipped cheerfully
" you look like the Hindenberg"
Everybody's a critic

Mapp & Lucia

If you are at home tonight and not worried about putting on a party hat and blowing a kazoo, I would recommend you watch Steve Pemberton's adaptation of E F Benson's MAPP & LUCIA which airs it's final episode tonight on BBC1.
Set in the picturesque seaside town of Tilling during the early 1930s it centres of the " playing" between Queen Bee spinster Elizabeth Mapp ( Miranda Richardson)  and theatrical socialite Lucia Lucas ( Anna Chancellor).
It's a comedy about social snobbery, one upmanship and small town life amid a collection of wonderfully eccentric local folk ( does that sound familiar?)  but amongst the pithy one liners and back stabbing storylines  the short series is almost a miniature essay of the phenomenon of "wanting to belong." Which has a certain pathos on screen.
Chancellor and Richardson are delightful in the lead roles and Tilling ( Rye in East Syssex) looks as sweet as a chocolate box top.........
Anyhow, I thought a mini review more interesting than the normal 2014 post mortem ....
I shall be working night shift tonight.......so I shall welcome in 2015 over the hiss- swish of eight Galileo ventilators.
Happy New Year
Xx

Murder In Trelawnyd

Winnie's favourite cock!

Her christmas squeak toy

Around 4 am this morning it was plainly evident that foul play had occurred in Trelawnyd for there was silence over the West part of the village.
The cockerel that roosts in the beech trees of the graveyard had gone.

The little bastard has been crowing lustily in the dark early mornings since he was dumped on me, and every effort on my behalf to catch him had failed miserably , so after several months surviving the elements , I found it strange that when we disappeared to Kent for a few days, he was gone  on our return!
The  mystery had everything of a Miss Marple adventure to it!
Who were the culprits of this heinous crime?
Was the abduction the responsibility of marauding badgers?
(Doubtful as badgers can't climb trees)
Or was it one of the residents of the lane, pig sick of the crowing in the middle of the night that might  have paid a local hit farmer to blast the noisy bastard right off his perch ?
Could it be trendy Carol or her husband Ewan from the end house?
Or Viv and Mike from the bungalow? (They may be pensioners but I've always noticed a steely strong stare behind the spectacles )
Or could it be John and Mandy from next door? They may have grinned their way through my frequent apologies with a Crisp " no he didn't wake us us this morning!" kind of statement but I was sure they were gritting their teeth behind the polite smiles
Whoever it was , not a feather was left behind to shed light on the case!

And peace has returned to Bwthyn y llan

It's made my Christmas!

Coast To Coast

Red pin Broadstairs/ blue pin Trelawnyd

After most of the day on the road

We had a tea of crushed sprouts and ham

Without unpacking the luggage

The dogs have reunited and as one are galloping around the cottage one minute then

Climbing on Chris who is resting weakly on the couch under his laura Ashley throw the other

I have enjoyed our time in Kent

We even got out together on our own...which is a rarity 

So our New Years resolution is to have more nights out Together!

Fat chance tonight though

As Albert has just hurtled through the cat flap with a wide grin on his chops to be reunited with
best buddy Winnie!

It's like the bloody finale of Lassie Come Home
Not a dry eye in the house

Stick that Cracker Up Yer Arse xx

One breakfast out, one walk around the cliffs of Broadstairs, a family meal, a trip to the cinema ( to see the Moses epic EXODUS - don't bother) a gin and tonic with another set of relatives and a large amount of smiling, small talk and chat, and my Christmas visit to Kent is almost over.
To me Christmas is generally all over bar the shouting on Boxing Day , so this prolonged festivity is a new thing for me.
This evening , on a visit to Chris ' uncle, I thought I had literally overdosed with christmas memorabilia as in front of the fireplace, the lady of the house had constructed a complete victorian village complete with snowy pine forest, stream, village bridge and rosy faced snowballing schoolboys

I'm all fucking Christmas-t out!

Ps..the only casualty of Christmas was Sorrel's plastic light up snowman
William pulled the carrot off its face an hour ago
Hey ho