Coconuts


The thirty something woman reached over the conveyer belt from her position behind me and pointed to the box of wipes in the centre of my shopping
" ohhh they look nice I didn't see them when I went round .." she read the box " oooooooh with coconut oil ! Just great for removing make up" 
I smiled and had the good grace to blush
" They are for your botty not your face " I whispered
And she hid her face with her hands.
I love little moments like these
My bum now smells Gently  of coconuts !
Like a Thai Curry


58 comments:

  1. They probably could be used on your face as well.
    Sadly we are told that the 'flushable' bit is not really true.

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    1. Oh god I've paid all that for a nasty carbon footprint

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    2. Or paid all that for a stopped up septic system!! (not good for town or city sewage systems either, which is what I think Elephant's Child may have been referencing)

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  2. And of course you were next to her! You seem to attract inquisitive types.

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  3. I misread 'Thai Curry' as 'Tim Curry' and wondered how you would know what Tim Curry smells of. :D

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  4. I could just eat your bum

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  5. What do you need them for?

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    Replies
    1. I love feeling squeaky clean

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    2. They seem false to me. I like clean water clean.

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    3. I need all the help I can get

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    4. You can say that again.

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  6. I will check back later to see what comments you get John this is ever so funny.

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  7. Hm, why not use them for your face? They haven’t got anything in them that would preclude that, have they?

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  8. At least you whispered it in the nicest possible taste.

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  9. this might have put me off of thai curry for a while.

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  10. Yes, John, you whispered it. You could have said it loudly!

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  11. Hahahahahaha! But don't believe the box. They are NOT flushable. They will clog up the sewer system like that huge plug of unspeakable proportions in the London sewer system that made the world news.

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    1. They are biodegradable

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    2. They don't degrade soon enough. They congregate in nasty gangs and stopper every pipe opening, and poor fellows must go down the sewer in boots and grapple with them. So, lean over and drop it in your waste basket and then all we "soddin," environmentalists will be OK-ish with them.

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  12. Why do you want your bum to smell of coconuts? No, don't answer that.

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    Replies
    1. It will remind me of the funfair

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    2. Haha 🤣🤣🤣

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  13. john gray is incorrigible!

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  14. Lori Wong9:16 pm

    How about using a bidet or having a nice microfiber cloth and a bucket of soapy coconut water? Then you can alleviate the guilt of the non-flushable wipe.

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  15. Next time we see a fatberg being removed from a sewer we can say "I know someone who uses those wipes."

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    Replies
    1. They say that they are flushable!

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    2. Here in Canada, one of the news shows did a piece on the fact that none of the 'flushable' wipes should ever be flushed down the drain. They just don't disintegrate the way they're supposed to, so I would be cautious.

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    3. They're not. Maybe there's a need to change once diet ... Good poop doesn't smear ... Fibres and probiotics...

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  16. Yay ... no more skid marks 🤣🤣

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  17. 52 wipes per pack seems an odd number.
    one a week for four years? four a week for one year? very strange

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous6:29 am

      coffee through my nose lol

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  18. You will be all summer fresh down there. Wait until the dogs take a sniff.

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  19. Cleanliness is next to godliness, or elegantly poo free.

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  20. Barbara Anne12:35 am

    and here I am thinking of the song "Oh, what a loverly bunch of coconuts ..." :)

    Winnie will be so pleased or is she waiting for eu du plumber?!

    Hugs!

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  21. I was with you til the image of your butt smells like Thai curry, John. eeeew. [prob could wipe one's hands or face too? I recently got coconut oil infused wipes for my pug's itchy paws; he like them]

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  22. You naughty boy.
    If you only know what I’m thinking about... 😄🤣😂

    XoXo

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  23. Oh John, how gay can one get. I must look around for some whiskey smelling paper for Andrew's Christmas present.

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  24. A pina colada smelling bum .... do the wipes come with little cocktail umbrellas for a final embellishment 🤣 XXXX

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  25. They say they are flushable but tests have shown that they do not break down. Put them in your airing cupboard and have nice scented sheets ?

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  26. It looks like you're now lumbered with a large pack of environmentally unfriendly sanitary products (EUSP). All you can do with them is go to Houston and fire them into space.

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  27. Maybe you could use face ones on your bum?

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  28. Oh to be you. I would have simply smiled at her. Mmmm. Thai curry butt.

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  29. Good news and bad. There is to be a "Fine to Flush" logo (water industry regulations approved UK) for wet wipes. Bad news - they are still being tested. You could volunteer? Could Trelawnyd's drains take it?

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  30. Such short, friendly encounters with others can brighten one's day, can't they? For a while, before a brain surgery performed miracles, I was isolated at home. I was lucky to have a loving husband and also other relatives who visited, but such passing encounters were impossible. What joy such brief exchanges bring now.

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  31. A lot of coverage about this in the media over the past few weeks. Tesco should be ashamed of themselves. Very bad for the environment and certainly not flushable.

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  32. You can use them for Winnie’s fanny flannel after using them to clean between the folds on her face. A great multi-purpose purchase. You’ll not only feel clean and sparkly, but you’ll evoke the feeling of a holiday on a tropical island.

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I love all comments Except abusive ones from arseholes