I was on the school pick up yesterday, so took Winnie down to the school gates at three pm. I always take one of the dogs, so I don't look like a pervert to those parents who don't know me.
Six year old Liv is always out first and seconds after we have the usual diva greetings she and her classmates were rubbing chubby hands all over Winnie's body.
" Feel her nipples" Liv gave her instructions to two little boys " that's where she fed her babies"
" They are called udders" one of the boys said very seriously as he crouched down to have a better look, the other boy was busy poking his finger into the folds of Winnie's face wrinkles .
I became slightly worried when another little girl bounced up and started to rub Winnie's bottom, but the old bulldog lapped up the attention like a sponge.
" They are called teats!" I told the children as the nipple inspection continued and they all burst out laughing...
Liv, Winnie and I then waited for older sister Eve to get out of the senior class and together we went back to the cottage. Both girls pointed at the ceramic egg in the garden and after I shouted out that it was a genuine dinosaur egg they chorused " YOU LIE!"
It's a game we play.
Yesterday I had two activities planned. The girls were asked to design several greetings card ( Including a Birthday card for the Prof) then we made zombie gingerbread men which were hot out of the oven by the time affable despot Jason was knocking at the cottage window ready to pick them up.
lol ....pervert at the school gates . Just remember dont say would you like to come see my puppies
ReplyDeleteGood with kids as well as with animals. You're a good man John.
ReplyDeleteLike when you said teats, did you say that literally or how it is more commonly pronounced?
ReplyDeleteLucky kids to have you and Winnie meet them for some after-school fun.
ReplyDeleteWe have a small neighbour (8) who turns up occasionally. If Lady M is baking, she simply joins in and helps. Life is never dull, either in Trelawnyd or here.
ReplyDeleteYou should do your nursing in pediatrics! You have a way with kids...a rare gift.
ReplyDeleteI definitely want to see photos of the gingerbread zombies!
ReplyDeleteLook at yesterdays post x
DeleteThe girls were definitely proud of you and Winnie. Greetings Maria x
ReplyDeletePoor old Winnie! I bet the girls had great fun designing their cards and making zombie ginger bread men too. What other activities do you have lined up for them? You could get them to sow some seeds for themselves and for you and the prof during spring. I am all for productive and educational activities that are fun too!
ReplyDeleteIn the good weather, they like pottering on the field
DeleteI love Simone's idea about sowing seeds. Having kids help plant and tend a vegetable garden is a great way to get them to eat veggies they might not otherwise touch.
ReplyDeleteSounds like fun,
ReplyDeleteWhat sweet memories those little girls will have ..
ReplyDeleteCould you post the recipe for Auntie Glad's scones?
ReplyDeleteWill do sue, i shall pop round for it when ive time
DeleteWhat happy girls - John you have so much patience with them. Bet the zombie ginger bread men were a great success !
ReplyDeleteI envy you that special time with the kids. What a joy.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm surprised all it takes is a bulldog sidekick to ensure you don't look like a pervert.
A fun day for all. No lie! :-)
ReplyDeleteYou're a good man.
ReplyDeleteIt is sad that you even had to think like that John.... and lovely that did. x
ReplyDeleteThose gingerbread zombies are TOO funny!
ReplyDeleteSounds delightful, John! I remember the school run as being less fun. Of course it was everyday, for years and years and years.
ReplyDeleteI am lucky, i do the occassional " nice " time rather than the mundane
DeleteI would like to join in these activities. Sounds like every one had a good time.
ReplyDeleteThe gingerbreat was very nice,.,. American gingerbread seems sweeter than ours...the zombie set was a gift from a dear blog reader!
DeleteThe smiles on those girls say it all.
ReplyDeleteYou are a sweetheart! Lucky girls..and lucky you for having them in your life.
ReplyDeleteThe zombies were perfect! I'm sure the girls enjoyed making them. What a good kid sitter you are! The affable despot's daughters are adorable, and look so happy.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if Winnie ever recalls life before you took her under your wing. In comparison she must now be in true doggie paradise!
ReplyDeleteI marvel at her calmness...as far as i know, she'd ever met a small child before coming to us
DeleteCan I come and play at your house after school? (Wishing I was six years old again.)
ReplyDeleteHow lovely ... for you, the girls and winnie.
ReplyDeleteI could SO make up a story using your first paragraph! (It could go either way, lol)
ReplyDeleteWhen does Chris have a birthday? Maybe the girls will help you decorate the cake?
Go on...id read it
DeleteMy blog for the day, haha. Have at it!
DeleteOne of the kindest people I know, is the teacher of second graders. I always think that it would have changed my life, at least as it related to school, in a much better way if I had had a teacher like him .. and also probably like you.
ReplyDeleteI am sitting here with 2 cats and there are TORNADO warnings in my area. Gee , life is a funfest in NY State.
Tornado warnings! Yikes..........id be in the cellar
DeleteSounds like a grand day!
ReplyDeleteKids usually love animals and it sounds like your gang there are no exception! Love the photo of the gingerbread zombies yesterday. Prof's birthday coming up soon, is it?
ReplyDeleteEarly may.......i'm well organised.....not
DeleteI love that you have activities for them to do. You're awesome.
ReplyDeleteI would have loved to have been a daddy
DeleteOh what a great daddy you would have been ..
DeleteAny mention of bums, boobs or poo and you're onto a winner with kids......and me too hehehe
ReplyDeleteLOL, isn't it funny ... just mention poo and they fall over laughing. silly little creatures. I love small children. With their perfect open minds and senses of humor . I would have had more but ... they grow up. Annoying habit of cute sweet little children, they turn into obnoxious older kids/teenagers/adults who boss their parents around. I like my cats better these days :)
DeleteI think nature turns them into teenagers to stop you having more! Especially when they have the permanent jutting bottom lip because life is SO unfair. It is nice when they grow into adults that you actually enjoy spending time with, But my dogs come a very close second hehe
DeleteStanding outside the school trying desperately not to look like a paedophile and you end up talking about nipples and teats! This could only happen in Grayworld. As for Jason I hope he didn't burn his trotters when he picked up the hot gingerbread men.
ReplyDeleteOh John, I have been meaning to tell you .. Do you know what a Murmuration is ? I have had two in the past year .. it is like having , I don't know, God visit the backyard or something .. and then the other day .. I looked out the bedroom window in the evening, while it was still light and there was mama deer with her baby. The first Murmuration I ever saw was a video online, by girls in the UK ..
ReplyDeleteNo wonder they love coming to your house!
ReplyDeleteMost nights I lie in bed and read blogs. I usually snort at yours, tonight it was the pervert bit. My husband always looks at me and I say "oh it's just John." I then get a prof type eyebrow look.
ReplyDeleteThat comment made my day x
DeleteWhat fun . . .
ReplyDeleteThey love being with you . . .
And you love being with them . .,
Plus you do all these fun things!
Goodness, it looks as if they're making a hundred birthday cards, not just one.
ReplyDeleteYes. Standing at the school gates and getting young children to feel your bulldog's tits sounds a perfect way to ensure nobody thinks you may be an unsavoury character... then taking a couple of the youngster home to make biscuit zombies covered in blood. How could anyone possibly feel dubious about you? (Just nipping in on a flying visit so that Rachel can say "I told you so".)
ReplyDeleteHello Andrew. I told you so John. R
DeleteOh to be 6 again...
ReplyDeleteIf you live long enough, you will be :)
DeleteBrilliant! hehehehehe
DeleteWhat a jolly well-rounded gentleman you are.
ReplyDeleteThe girls are so lucky to have you. You do such creative fun things with them! This is more fun than Girl Scouts! Winnie is such a doll! Love her...
ReplyDeleteOh, my, you have just sparked a memory for my Monday blog! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteCat