Tuesday, 5 May 2015

Light & Shade

When you have visiting family, there is often very little time to do anything else.
Chris is not much of an organiser when things that are not work involved. He prefers to let me fine tune things. It's the way we work.
And so on Friday he mentioned that Mrs Trellis had phoned to ask us all round for a quick drink but had deferred the " sorting out " to me.
I called round at dusk to say we would come.
" I've just been writing an eulogy for sweep" she said and although I was busy, I asked to hear it.
I was glad that I did
There were no lights on in Mrs Trellis' house, and in the gloom of dusk in her kitchen she read out her thoughts about her cherished old dog without embarrassment. Her voice quiet .
I found the whole thing rather moving.

A companion warm and true, whenever I was sad, you came with enquiring eye
Bright with love.
Many many miles we walked.
In early morning mists, past sunlit meadows,
enjoyed warm summer days.
In Autumn the changing leaves matched the colours of your lovely coat.

We saw squirrels chase, we heard the woodpecker drill his tree,
the buzzard mew, teaching her young to hunt.
We stood aside as horses passed.

Head held high, you sniffed the air of the new mown hay, honeysuckle and pine.

You travelled on with proud step in wind, rain and winter snows when even the rooks
were silent.
We walked in the pink glow of fabulous sunsets.

To see the light go from your beautiful eyes.
No more, the lick on my hand , or the paw to hold,
No more the clown to play your favourite ball games.
The garden is quiet, your blackbird does not come to welcome the eventide
I miss him too.

So until we can be together once more 
Goodbye and god bless

The depth of affection humans  possess for animals baffle some people, but I think anyone " non dog"  would have been moved by Mrs Trellis' sincerity and her reading of a poem  at a gloomy kitchen table on a bank holiday weekend.

If Mrs Trellis had lost a relative then, as a regular Churchgoer, I would have thought she would have received support and comfort from the whole congregation. But because she had lost her dog, I don't think that she had received one card of sympathy. 
Funny that.

85 comments:

  1. My heart goes out to poor Mrs Trellis because I know the heartache of losing a dear friend and companion. I'm not ashamed to admit that her beautiful words made me cry, especially the second part. I hope those villagers who read your blog will now offer some words of comfort and sympathy to the dear lady. I send her a huge, gentle hug from Cornwall. xx

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  2. I'm glad too that you took the time to listen to Mrs Trellis's heartfelt eulogy. Thank you (and her) for sharing it. I echo Rambler in hoping that villagers who read your blog will offer comfort.

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  3. This was so moving so beautiful it made me cry. I hope that her friends and neighbours will give her a hug. So lovely of you to take the time and listen she needs more friends like you. It is so hard when we lose our furry companions when they are here they only ask for us to take care of them and in return give us all their love.
    Rosezeeta.

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  4. When one loses their companion of many years and whose love was never in question, it is heartbreaking. She knew you would understand. Most of us who read your blog also can relate.

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  5. that made me cry.

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  6. sincere and heartfelt; thank you for publishing this, john.

    you can tell mrs. trellis next time that we animal companion lovers across the pond send her our condolences. we have all been in her shoes.

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  7. Anyone who has lost a loved pet grieves with her. How beautifully she expressed her loss and her love.

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  8. Mrs. Trellis, You write beautifully. You have used your talent to soothe yourself and honor Sweep. With the stroke of a pen we know your dog and feel your loss. Please keep writing.

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    1. Jan
      I willpassthis and other comments on to her....

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  9. Can you please give Mrs Trellis a hug for me? Her poem is beautiful and we who love our furkids do understand, even if some around her do not. xxx

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  10. That's a lovely tribute, and you are so right about the lack of sympathy expressed. I'd be utterly heart broken if I lost either of my two, they are right at the centre of our family here.

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  11. People do forget that animals can be like children to their owners and deserve the same respect.

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  12. Mrs. Trellis, it may not feel like it just now, but you are not alone. Around the world, people share your mourning, and feel the love you had for your beautiful Sweep, and the love he had for you... the tribute you wrote is beautiful and moving. We may be far away, but we are right there with you in heart.

    Thank you, John, for the care you show for Mrs. Trellis... and for allowing us to share our caring as well.

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  13. In some ways it is worse losing a pet than a close relative. One dog we had put down in his old age we loved dearly. At least with pets you can love one more than another. I guess the cost of the putting down procedure was quite high, I can't recall now and probably barely noticed at the time, but to our surprise the vet sent us flowers with a lovely note attached. We then did the crying and reminiscing we needed to do. S'cuse I for now. Something caught in my throat.

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    1. I still get " full up" thinking of finlay and he died 7 years ago

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  14. Dear Mrs Trellis; a fellow dog lover. I do hope you show her all these comments.

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  15. Tell her please that all over the world, even here, people are sharing her sorrow.

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  16. Mrs Trellis, I hope your lovely memories of Sweep sustain you in your grief.

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  17. Somewhere in a shelter there is no doubt a lonely dog who
    could in a sense write that lovely poem to a former owner.
    Once Mrs. Trellis has grieved sufficiently, perhaps you could
    suggest she adopt a dog who would thrive on the love and
    caring she could give it.

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    Replies
    1. She's already thinking of it shiela....
      I think she may babysit Meg too when we go on holiday

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  18. Those were heartfelt words by Mrs Trellis. Grief is such a personal thing and it is difficult to know how you can help a grieving person. Mrs Trellis and Sweep had something special. x

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  19. As someone who has had many pets, and lost many pets, I know how she feels. Her words were lovely.

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  20. I agree with Sheila. I had a 5 and a half year old Boxer die of a blood clot back in mid-February, 2 weeks after she was cremated I went out and got Sig, a 9 week old Boxer pup. While we all need to grieve, living is so much better.

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  21. How sad none of her church recognized her loss...She must be heart broken. I just don't understand people. That was a beautiful tribute.

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  22. That is a beautiful eulogy and I felt so sad reading it but a true testament to a loved companion.

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  23. Please let Mrs Trellis know that there are many around the world who understand and whose hearts are sad for her. Her poem is a beautiful, moving tribute and - if my experience is anything to go by - will help her sadness somewhat. I'm glad you are a caring ear, John, for those who need one and have no other.

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  24. John i am an animal advocate and i loved and was very moved by your eulogy to this much loved pet, may i have your permission please to share this with my fellow dog lovers i will not use your name unless you want me to and i will not take credit for it i will simply say written by a fellow blogger. Thank You i will understand if you say no.

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    1. Thats fine...mrs trellis is not mrs trellis' real name so please use the blog entry.....mrs T was happy other people read her poem

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  25. Poor Mrs Trellis, she has lost such a dear and faithful companion.

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  26. Massive hugs to Mrs Trellis from a fellow dog lover. Even though she may not have had many condolences from those near by, I hope she can feel those from your blog readers. x

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  27. People who don't own dogs have no idea the depth of love we have for our mutts. I have loved every single dog I have had and I miss them all dearly.

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  28. I belong right after Weaver; my thought is identical.

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  29. Beautiful words. They made me cry. I can tell how much love and friendship there was between her and her dear Sweep.

    I've had relatives die and it didn't hurt as much as losing a dog. Please give Mrs Trellis a hug for me.

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  30. Beautiful heartfelt words, those of us who have loved and lost our furry companions know the heartache.
    We share your grief.
    Hugs,
    ~Jo

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  31. For a few of us, losing our beloved pets is worse even than the loss of a human as our pets give us so much love and devotion; their innocence the main reason for our pain. I always think of a poem by Edna St. Vincent Millay -
    "Parrots, tortoises and redwoods live a longer life than men do;
    Men a longer life than dogs do;
    Dogs, a longer life than love does."

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  32. That was beautiful. One day soon grief will be replaced with happy memories.

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  33. Mrs Trellis' words are beautiful, obviously her dog was a great and faithful companion and she was obviously the same to Sweep. It is so sad that those who do not have a pet do not realise the effect that their loss has. I can only assume that it is because they themselves have never experienced the deep love and care that you receive and give when you have a pet of your own. Give Mrs Trellis a hug and send her all my good thoughts!

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  34. Very moving John. It's a bereavement and sense of loss when one of our four legged pals passes away. I hope Mrs Trellis gets a new dog soon.

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  35. That eulogy brought a significant lump to my throat. I can fully relate to people's emotions on losing pet animals and have never been one to belittle it by relegating its significance "while there is human suffering around". Bosh! - It's every bit as real as losing a dear one though, for an unfathomable reason, some seem to think it's a bit shameful to mourn for the loss of an animal. My heart goes out to her.

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  36. That was so sweet. I'm taken aback by the lack of empathy of people. One thing we all have in common is that we all experience loss. It doesn't hurt at all to give someone a little sympathy and kindness.

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  37. She writes nicely about her dog. I don't think we should condemn her friends at church so harshly. . I bet she got some sympathy, at least if she let them in to her heart. The lack of cards does not mean nobody cared. Unless she said nobody cared.

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    1. Perhaps ( for a change) im a little harsh...but i dont think so

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    2. It wasn't so much you John; some of the comments seemed very harsh to me, and cast the first stone and all that.

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  38. When I hear my new friend, Mr. Blackbird, who has taken to perching in my Rowan Tree these past few weeks, trilling away this evening, I shall ask him to trill a little louder so Mrs. Trellis can hear him too. x

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    1. What a lovely thought..

      Jo in Auckland, NZ

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  39. That is a beautiful eulogy. I still feel great sadness at the loss of my gorgeous dog and that is nearly 4 years ago. The tears are never far away and when I hear of someone losing a much loved doggy friend whether I know them or not, I feel the pain and could quite easily cry for England. I too hope Mrs Trellis finds a new doggy companion when the time is right for her. xxx

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  40. Tell Mrs T my baby is getting feebler (she's 16) and her lovely words about her beloved pet inspired me today. They bring us so much, the memories will sustain her. And non-pet lovers NEVER understand. If they did they would have pets of their own.
    XO
    WWW

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  41. How beautiful, I wasn't expecting to cry today :)

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  42. What a lovely, lovely poem. She had me to tears. I much prefer my four footed companions and wish they could live as long as we do. It is so hard to lose them.

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  43. Please give a gentle hug to Mrs Trellis from me. I understand her feelings too well.

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  44. oh my. this made me cry the ugly-cry. i just said goodbye to my Constant Companion of 15 years [ a little sausage-dog named Oscar] last Thursday and i'm profoundly adrift in that it generally isn't "done" to go on and on about how sad i am to have lost him. he was "just a dog" after all, and had "had a good long life". i don't think it matters whether he was a dog or that he was old -- i loved him dearly and now he's gone.

    please give Mrs. Trellis my sincerest love and condolences. that was a lovely tribute to her friend.

    you're a magical sort of person to have listened.

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    1. So sorry mel. I think we've all been where you are
      Not a nice place eh?

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    2. My sympathy, too, mel. The greater the love, the sharper the grief. It doesn't matter what species, what age, what kind of "end" our loved one had - the loss is very hard. Wishing you well.

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  45. Aw - I'm still mourning Dolly, and she wasn't even my dog.

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    1. Mrs trellis ' sweep was just like dolly
      Though somewhat meaner

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  46. Bless Mrs. Trellis, what a wonderful tribute to her beloved companion. It made me cry for my Virginia who was a goat, not a dog, but I miss her terribly.

    You're a true friend for listening to Mrs. T when she needed a compassionate ear. xoxo

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  47. We still struggle at the loss of our Betty. Give Mrs Trellis a warm hug from us please John. And on a lighter note I would gladly send her Popeye the poop eater....just a thought

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    1. " popeye the poop eater" that will raise a smile me thinks

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  48. O my Lor' can barely see the keys to type. Please tell Mrs T that I am so sorry for her loss and very moved by her words - absolutely beautiful x

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  49. That eulogy made me forget to breath; it was so heartfelt and vivid. My heart goes out to Mrs. Trellis. I am glad you could be there to listen to her.

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  50. Dear, loving Mrs. T. I still feel the sharp stab of loss from the absence of my Tess (she passed in November) I tell myself it's silly to grieve a dog so deeply, but all of you make me feel like it's perfectly ok. Thank you to all of you. Great, now I'm crying again.......with great love, there can be great sorrow, but I wouldn't NOT love to avoid the sorrow.

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  51. What a lovely poem she wrote for her dog. I am sitting here with tears running down my cheeks. Beautiful.
    When my Scotty Kirby died, I wrote a wee book about her and send them to my friends. One fried read it to her child as a good night story and wanted me to really make it a book.
    I loved that dog and miss her terribly as with all my dogs.
    I love all my wee friends and my life would be so lonely with out them,

    cheers, parsnip

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  52. Mrs.Trellis' eulogy to her dog is now 'out there' for all to read and appreciate.
    this is very special indeed, John. Thanks for sharing.

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    1. Jimbo
      I will thank mrs trellis on your behalf

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  53. A lovely poem and a timely reminder, thank you.

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  54. Thank you for sharing this. It reminded me of when we lost our lovely Britta and how they leave a huge hole in your heart.

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    1. I think mrs trellis has touched a lot of nerves
      Good for her x

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  55. What an earth shatteringly beautiful memoriam.

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  56. John that is so beautiful ... I want to give Mrs Trellis a hug...you retell stories with so much emotion... I feel sad and uplifted at the same time..xx

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  57. Lovely, lovely, lovely.

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  58. Another one here with "something in her eye." Mrs Trellis wrote a lovely eulogy that struck a chord with me, too.

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  59. Oh gosh what moving words. She must be bereft without her dog.

    As you say you get nowhere near as much sympathy when you lose a furry companion even though you might have had them in your life longer than many of your human ones.

    Please give her a hug and let her know that there are fellow dog owners and dog lovers all around the world holding her in their hearts thanks to your blog.

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  60. Today is the fourth anniversary of losing my beloved Susie so my heart goes out to Mrs Trellis. Her poem made me cry but her memories are beautiful. I hope she finds such companionship again - you can't replace a beloved dog, but you can love another.

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  61. Poor Mr Trellis, that made me cry too, thank you for listening to her when she needed someone John x

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  62. Please commend Mrs Trellis on her fine words, that I have now read several times.

    Some time, when the time is right, she would make a fine friend for a new puppy or young dog, perhaps.

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  63. Poor Mrs. Trellis. That is a lovely tribute. Losing a dog is certainly sad and traumatic. I speak from past experience!

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  64. Such a beautiful tribute to her faithful friend. Please give Mrs Trellis a hug for me, it is so hard to lose such a close companion of many years. They love us so unconditionally and completely and always bring joy. I still miss my dog who was my childhood friend from age 9 to 23.

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  65. I read the eulogy for Sweep and whilst I expected to be sad I never expected to be crying my eyes out! Please give her a hug from me John, Mrs Trellis, you write such beautiful words that I can't help being moved. Your words took me on your life journey with your beloved Sweep and it was easy to visualise how each moment played out. Thank you for that....I'm so very sorry for your loss xx

    Jo in Auckland, NZ

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    1. Jo, tomorrow i will take my laptop to her house... So she can read the comments
      Thank you

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    2. I recommend you don't leave her to browse to the goings on behind the goose shed.

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  66. Hi John, I noticed it was ok to share Mrs Trellis's poem so I shared it on my blog, credited to her (as Mrs Trellis of course) and with a link to your blog. It is just such a lovely poem that shows not only how we feel when we lose them, but also how a dog can open our senses to nature in new ways while they are alive.

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  67. To be moved by someone's writings, someone I've never met, and someone who is thousands of miles away, yet to understand fully the pain of losing that beloved pet...that links us all together.

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