Wednesday, 29 January 2014

Wrong Day. Wrong Film


I wasn't quite in the mood for the " harrowing" story of redemption and forgiveness  set against the Japanese brutality of Allied POWs during WW2, you have to be on fairly robust form to sit through Colin Firth doing haunted and Nicole Kidman doing worthy.
The Railway Man is an appropriately difficult and  for me an unoriginal watch. I am sure that it had
plenty to say about the remarkable real life hero Eric Lomax.but like I said, I wasn't quite in the mood for it all.
Before we left, I had made the mistake of ringing work to find out the fate of the patient I had worked with during two incredibly hard and stressful twelve hour shifts last weekend. The patient was young and was terribly poorly and the very " intensive" nature of my interactions with him and his family had meant that I had forged an unique bond with them all. This is common phenomenon on ITU where 1 to 1 nursing is the norm.
Anyhow, as it happened I spoke to the nurse who had originally handed over the patient to me, just before she left for home and she told me that the patient had sadly died of his injuries.

I am generally well able to compartmentalise work into a safe  and well managed little box, after all, I had done it for so many years now.
But I felt somewhat deflated and upset about what had transpired all this evening.
Two hours of Colin Firth' s morose face didn't help either
Hey ho

33 comments:

  1. Oh, my, sorry. It is hard not to bond with your patients, though, isn't it? Sending hugs.

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  2. What sad news.
    Thank Goodness you have all the smiling gud dug to greet you along with the waggie Winnie.

    cheers, parsnip

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  3. Quite a grim film, I believe. You may compartmentalise, but not everything will fit into a compartment. Some things are just the wrong shape.

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  4. I'm so sorry John.....your job certainly isn't for the faint at heart.

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  5. No matter how hardened you think you are against the very nature of intensive care, it can still shock and sadden you when someone you've tried so hard to save eventually dies. A big, gentle (((((((HUG))))))) for you, John; a shame that you had arranged to see this particular film at this particular time. So sorry. xx

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  6. So sorry. Hugs to you.

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  7. I am sorry. I don't know how nurses do their work for years and years and remain caring and empathetic. I've had the good luck to witness it, though, with family members. Speaking from that perspective, I am sure your good care was a comfort to this youngster's family.

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  8. I can sympathise with you John it is not easy. I always found it worse on night duty. Not a very appropriate film with the situation. Of course what is worse is that you know it is going to happen again. Hugs!

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  9. Sending you blessings and hugs, and wrapping you round with a blanket of love. Vx

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  10. When you needed a film to raise your spirits, 'The Railway Man' was hardly the one to do it. Not exactly the barrel of laughs required.
    Condolences on your news, which must have felt like yet another wrench.

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  11. The problem with compartmentalising is that the space between the boxes is usually where we live and doesn't always feel comfortable....sending ether hugs x

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  12. So sorry to hear about your patient John, that's a tough call.

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  13. I can really feel the depth of your anguish in this post and really feel for you.

    You and all the folk that work in your area of expertise must have the most harrowing days and nights ... thank you for what you do. I'm sure you made the patient's and his parents time with you the most comfortable and bearable that you could.

    This type of film is not the antidote to that sort of day or phone call. You needed the Three Stooges and a few custard pies, not a haunted Colin Firth or a worthy Nicole Kidman.

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    1. Sue
      Thank you for that but it's not a dramatic as you think
      However..just sometimes...certain patients and their families get under your skin and you suddenly feel more responsible for making things better.
      Funny but the nurse that handed over to me felt exactly the same

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  14. A tough coincidence.

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  15. You have been through quite a few sad days in a row John. I don't think I could have coped with that film even if I was feeling upbeat. x

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  16. My sister gave notice that she is giving it up in 2 weeks this Tuesday. She has been nursing for 30 years. She said there have been highs and lows but the highs were more numerous.....

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  17. There are times that I like sad movies, but it is good to stay away when things around me at not going well.

    I have always loved working in human services, but there is a toll to pay on human heart.

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  18. Sorry to read that...your job must be so hard emotionally.

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  19. i am sorry to hear about your patient. that must be tough.

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  20. You have to particular type of person to be able to deal with death so often, and see people all day at their worst John. I'm sorry you lost this patient, and I'm hoping you have a much better week.

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  21. Sorry you had a bad week. I do the same job as you. Some families you just bond with............if they were neighbours, you would have a cuppa with them . Hope you feel more cheerful soon.

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  22. If you shut your emotions off totally, you wouldn't be as good a nurse as you patently are John. x

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  23. What's the word? Detachment. Yes, good old detachment. Easier said than done. Which is why I was strongly advised against going into one of those professions where you deal, on a daily basis, face to face, with humanity's woes.

    The ideal being compassionate 'on the job', at end of day being able to shut the door behind you and letting self-preservation kick in. Doesn't always work like that, does it?

    The above by small token of admiration I have for you and all those we depend and rely on when wind is taken out of our own sails.

    Hug,
    U

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  24. Sorry to hear that John, big hug from me sir.

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  25. You darling man/village lady - saw this and thought it might cheer you up https://www.wmc.org.uk/Productions/2014-2015/WestonStudio/LadyGoGoGoch/?view=Standard If you want to come and see it you know there is a welcome in the hillside around the Bird hovel in Neath - from Andrea Bird (and not really Christopher Bird whose Google a/c is taking over the world)

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    1. It did make me smile......it's me!

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  26. No matter how many times you experience tragic death, you never can remove yourself completely. though I am not a nurse, I've had some life experiences, teaching, etc.
    God bless you.

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  27. Thank you all.............xxxxx

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  28. I'm sorry. I wish I'd been there. People tend not to die when I'm around. I don't know why. When I worked at the nursing home, I had to deal with only one death. Maybe the Grim Reaper is afraid of me, or perhaps it's the angels that I beg to accompany me. I love Colin Firth. I haven't heard of this movie. I might put it in my Netflix queue, if I remember. I have more than 300 movies in my queue.

    Love,
    Janie, who sometimes tends to ramble a bit

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  29. Probably got you on the wrong day John. The film is very hard to watch - especially as I knew 2 men who had been Japanese prisoners of war, but it made me think about the power of forgiveness and that I found very very moving. xxxxxx

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  30. I cannot watch movies like this as i tend to have nightmares, i'm just not good with horror, torture, and violence, which is why i don't watch many films.

    Sorry about your patient, all of those in my knitting group are/were nurses except me, and all but one have been OR nurses (OR=operating room), and they have stories, too, which they're not supposed to tell because of HIPAA. Our hostess is 90 now and trained as a nurse during WWII.

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  31. A close pal of mine is a nurse and he compartmentalises such things so well that I just don't know how he does it, or how any of you do; but I am very glad you do. Thanks.

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