Best Of Days


Monday night....sheffield...
Brilliant musical ( I cried buckets)
Drinks with a couple of old friends ( Mike and Jane)
Then.....a few more drinks and dancing in a salsa club until just after midnight
How good was that!!
I danced IN PUBLIC!!!!

Up at 9 am and just managed to fit in a two hour breakfast with the ever arch John H ( Eve Arden in nice shoes!!)

Then caught the 11.11 for home xx

Hey ho

I had sex the other day
No big deal, but I thought I'd share the fact with you.
It involved someone I have known a while and been friends with for a time now
We made each over laugh and although neither of us are looking for a relationship with the other
It was fun to giggle and laugh and feel nice that someone actually finds you attractive and likes you for who you are
( and visa versa of course)
We are friends so we will meet up again

I'm now on the train to Sheffield .
It s a quick night out in between shifts when I will meet up with an old friend, have supper , see a musical ( Theres something about Jamie) and relax.
And no it's not the same friend before you ask.


Hey ho xx





Separate Tables


Separate Tables is a 1950s movie version of two of Terrence Rattigan one act plays of the same title.
It is essentially a study of nine different types of loneliness and centres its story among the singletons that frequent a small genteel English hotel following the war.
It's a powerful film of a powerful play and the cast Rita Hayworth, Burt Lancaster, David Niven, Deborah Kerr, Wendy Hiller all play at the very top of their game
The main storyline has a retired and lonely major ( Niven) outed as a fraud and a fairly unsuccessful dirty old man. The other guests are reluctantly organised into agreeing with a bitter old widow (an odious  Gladys Cooper) that the major should be asked to leave the hotel but before he is about to go, the Major has to run the gauntlet of the breakfast dining room where the residents are gathered at their own, particular isolated separate Tables.
After one of the party breaks ranks and greets the shamed Major, gradually the others , including Cooper's neurotic daughter Sybil ( Deborah Kerr) join in, and film is left with the gentle optimism  of the kindness of ordinary people.
It's a lovely ending to a rather sad film

A Scotch Egg .......lost

The expected storm has hit Trelawnyd hard in the night.
So hard that the graveyard cockerels haven't crowed this morning,
They are struggling to keep their feet in the Church yew
I have slept badly
It's 5.45 am and I'm going to work soon
I went to see my aunt Judy yesterday
She gets discharged next week
She remains slightly dysphasic after her stroke
But laughed a little in between the more serious conversations .
The lady in the next bed was from Trelawnyd
And Judy pointed the fact out before I sat down
I have a lot of time for this lady, my aunt's neighbour, as she once made one huge glorious scotch egg which she entered and won in the one and only scotch egg class in the cookery section.
It looked like a magnificent grenade of a scotch egg
It was so big that it had to be lifted with two hands!
The cookery judge said she had NEVER seen anything quite like it EVER
IT WAS HEAVEN IN BREADCRUMBS!!! It was a monster....it was fantastic!!!
And I never got over the fact that the lady involved took her scotch egg home with her!!!!
And I never got to taste it!!!!!

An Italian In His Undercrackers

Look closely at the diners 

I was worried about the food.
After all Chic Eleanor is a fine diner and sara and her Italian Professor have lived their former lives in France and Italy where good food is as normal as breathing
I kept things simple with homemade soup and sourdough bread I baked yesterday morning, I then chose an all in one chicken,chorizo and veg dish smothered in garlic and herbs which impressed everyone and things were going swimingly until Eleanor jumped at the touch of hot dish of buttered beans and unexpectedly  flung them into the Italian Professor's lap
Things then got all a bit blurry with guests leaping and swearing in foreign tongues and with much
 shouting and trousers being pulled off!
Chic Eleanor maintained her composure throughout and sipping her wine said quietly
" I have appeared to have caused a calamity" as my other guests ran up to the bathroom to tend to a groin of third degree butter burns.
But things soon calmed down as everyone returned to finish their main courses. The Italian Professor sitting quite unconcerned in his underpants for the rest of the night.
I laughed until I cried.
A lovely night



Dear Philip


Philip Schofield, tv presenter comes out gay after thirty years of marriage



Dear Philip,

You came out on tv this morning.
You were brave and anguished and obviously felt that a pubic announcement was the way to go.
I send you my best wishes.
I send you my support.
It was obvious that you have discussed this at length with your immediate family.
Your concern for them was palpable and I hope the new definition of yourself will be easy on them all.....sometimes it's not only the news you have to share that is the important thing, it's the way you share it is vital.
It seems to me that you have shared your news with integrity...but
Being gay is just a tiny part of you
In many cases it's the least interesting thing to explain
Your family will continue to love you
Your friends will too.

For the most part, in this complicated, angry little world, being gay is no big deal anymore.
And I thank goodness for that.

Chin up
Tits out
And best wishes

John Gray
Trelawnyd

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I'm having a gentle sort of day today.
My rib fracture seems to be more of a set of pulled muscles ( I know drama queen) but the pain is just as bad, so I'm dosed up on painkillers as operation dog snot removal is underway.
Trendy Carol ( sporting a lovely mustard coloured winter coat and matching hat)  called around with an unexpected gift and Polish Monika knocked on the lane window to see if I wanted her to walk the dogs....
I've made spiced butternut soup and baked a sourbread loaf



I'll leave you with this shot of Just how well  the French Fire Service protests against cuts to their pension ....

Extravagances


With a new mortgage and all of the household and animal bills to cover ( as well as a divorce solicitor to pay as soon as she scratches her nose) my finances have been a constant worry over the past year.
I don't waste money on much.
I don't buy flash clothes. 
I drive a tiny economical car 
And over the months I now pay smaller direct debits than ever before
But I must admit that my one and only real extravagance is theatre

Like it's more easy accessible brother of Cinema , theatre has proved to be somewhat of a lifeline to me and with a nationally renown theatre just 20 minutes away, I have made every effort to see as many different productions as I can safely afford. 
The more experimental the production often means the Cheaper the ticket, and so, with the more "off piste" productions I can usually afford a couple of tickets and therefore can have company on a night out ( my poor friend Naomi must get a mention here as I have dragged her to some several truly dreadful nights out over the past year!!) 
I've also coupled theatre going with the catch up with friends, and so when I meet up with my Sheffield friends next week, we will also factor in the Sheffield based musical There's something about Jamie at the Lyceum and when I see Nu next in London , I booked a cheap as chips ticket to see a matinée of the wonderfully reviewed Come From Away!

Theatre feeds the soul ....like my choir, cinema and friendships

Tonight, full of painkillers, I went to see a fringe dystopian production American Nightmare at Theatre Clwyd with no more than 28 other theatre goers. 
I enjoyed it, it was interesting and provocative and I wanted to discuss it with someone when it was finished.
But of course I didn't ....
Thats the downside of going by yourself 😥 



The Dinner Party


I think I cracked a rib in yesterday 's fall.
Last night I spent a good hour in a hot bath in order to relieve the pain then had an awful battle getting out again so severe it became.
Luckily one of the villagers I know well is on strong painkillers, so after a minute's phone call and a brief walk in my pyjamas, I dosed myself up with some dihydrocodene  and then went to bed
Dorothy slept a millimetre away, with one guilty eye open on me  all night.

I still feel bloody sore this morning, but forced myself to go out dogwalking which was fortunate as
I bumped into Bernard-the -German who lives on Maes Offa
I say fortunate as on Friday I am hosting my first dinner party ( my first as a single person) and am in desperate need of professional cooking advice.
Bernard- the-German is a talented self taught cook who will share a full recipe anytime and anyplace and so in just two minutes flat I had been given a robust Spanish recipe for a chorizo chicken type casserole and was offered a black pudding alternative before I gave my excuses and moved on.
( he approved of my starter of homemade chilli squash soup with homemade sourdough)

The dinner party is in fact more of an evening supper for friends but this small event signifies something quite subtly important in my journey back into the singleton world.
It's a large step back into normality.
My guests are a gentle Italian academic and his warm and interesting wife and Chic Eleanor from the other side of the village,  so I'm in good, warm loving  hands.
Chic Eleanor texted me yesterday " Darling John , I can't wait to see you!" 
She's a sweetie!
I'm looking forward to see her and my other friends too....

Today is operation dog snot removal
Hey ho





Aches &'Pains


I took a tumble today.
Dorothy ran in to me on the beach and next thing I remembered I was face down on the sand smelling of shite.
The dog poo bag in my pocket had burst in the fall and I was winded
Bless she did look concerned

That was six hours ago and I'm home and now aching like a tart at the end of her shift
I can hardly get out of the armchair which is next to the fire.
I've read all afternoon though
A real rare luxury for me.

Hallelujah, The Fat Pony and open flies.......


I've had a lovely day.
First off came the chimney sweep.
I had swept the chimney myself but it had continued to smoke, so I got a little chap in to finish the job properly.
He came a year ago and fell in love with Winnie then, so it was lovely to see her lying next to him with her sleepy big head resting on the calf of his boiler suit as he beavered away.
I met a friend for brunch ( a glorious corned beef hash at "y Shed " ) then left him in a rush in order to meet my sister's at pottery class.
My pony was fired and glazed and looked mighty fine with his proud head, so I made Albert a selection of painted food bowls as Janet glazed her pieces and Ann threw some more pots on her wheel.
We've all loved our time with clay.

Tonight was choir and for an hour we all grappled manfully with Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah as Jamie ( sadly sans his 1940's RAF moustache )bounced around with his flies open.
I did notice at first, but soon forgot, ( I got lost in the practise and anyway didn't want to be accused as being a crotch watcher!!) Thank goodness for the quick thinking Hattie who had the prescience of mind of sending his music iPad the needed " your flies are open!!" message

I saw Trendy Carol too.....she thanks everyone for their kind wishes in the previous post!
"They were kind and they helped" ...she said 

Seren

At teatime there was a gentle knock on the lane window
It was Trendy Carol and her face had crumpled up like old newspaper
Her poorly Welsh Terrier Seren was no better and she had just been asked to make the decision all pets owners dread
It was time to say goodbye.
Carol had that faraway lost look of the shocked
So I suggested that I take her and her husband to the vets ten miles away.
I am glad I did as the waiting room was filled with bright eyed and yappy  patients which were too much for Carol to bare. I waited in line for the appointment to come
Whilst carol and her husband waited outside .
They didn't have to wait long.

A dog's death has a special power about it.
There is something quite special about just how, once owner and dog are reunited, a certain peace descends .
All the dog can see and feel is the presence of the pack .
The alpha is back in charge.
The immediacy of the moment taking over .
It's lovely but heartbreaking to watch as the dog has no real concept of the reality of the moment.
And so minutes after we arrived
Poorly Seren gently folded into Carol's lap little a sleepy toddler would do at the end of a busy day and all Carol could feel was the oh-so-familiar warmth of a Black and Tan body on her own

A Difficult Brexit



The abandoned cockerel was rehomed today.
He remained incredibly bad tempered and I had to employ the duck egg blue oven gloves again, to manhandle him back into his cardboard box, so violent was his spur covered karate feet..
An old chicken experienced contact of mine had agreed to take him on and half way to his farm this morning  ( and on the A 55 expressway) the bugger started to kick his way out of his original cardboard box, much to the hysteria of the dogs who where bunched fearfully together in the opposite side of the back seat as the cockerel bellowed like bull.
I was forced to pull over in St Asaph and after a brief struggle I managed to hobble the cockerel with a dog lead then quieten him by pulling a hastily removed sock over his head.
He looked like the oddest of kidnap victims by the time we got to our destination
"Has he a name? "the gentleman farmer asked as he gave me my sock back with a look of incredulity
 " Brexit !" I told him and in way of some explanation added " He arrived last Thursday night! 
" That....doesn't bode well" the farmer sighed as he wrestled the cockerel under some sort of control
As I drove off, I could hear him yelling at Brexit as the pair headed towards a barn
" Whoooa yer bastard !" 
What have I done , I thought 

This afternoon, I met Cheryl who is an old friend from my psychiatry days for a long lunch in Chester
We have known each other over 34 years.
And we still can't take a proper selfie between us


And are wearing the same magnification Poundland specs !!!



Little Women



Prof Bhaer

Most of us know the filmed versions of Little Women.
I would guess the faithful 1994 and the more saccharine 1949 films would spring quickly to mind rather than the more unlikely 1933 movie but one way or another most of us would have our favourite Jo's and most tearstained Beth death scene.
I've always enjoyed the nineties version and bits of the post war one, and so I was a little sceptical about seeing Greta Gerwig's more feministly robust version.
I found the messages of women's empowerment slightly heavy handed much preferring Alcott's powerful original prose. Indeed one scene where the saintly Marmee ( a nice turn by Laura Dern ) gives advice to the headstrong Jo ( Saoirse Roman) by saying " I hope you'll do a great deal better than me. There are some natures too noble to curb and too lofty to bend."..Lingers long in the psychi.


I enjoyed this movie. It's worthy, lovely to look at and filled with some lovely performances by the four female leads.
But it is a tad overlong even though for my money so could have sat through another hour of the Professor Bhaer character on screen.
As played by the very sexy Louis Garrel he put his previous counterparts Rosano Brazzi and Gabriel Byrne well into the shade

The Mystery Guest


I've arranged it
If I die in the non too distant future my colleague has agreed to do something for me at my funeral.
Picture this.
A hall of sorts, ( Not a Church) 
Everyone ( and there is a full house) is seated
The coffin is a pretty wicker one with meadow flowers on it and is situated at The front of the central aisle.
The celebrant is just about to start his address when there is a bang of the hall doors
A mystery woman enters.
All dressed in black.
Large hat
Thick veil
In her right hand a single red rose
In her left a white handkerchief.
The celebrant ( who is in on the ruse) welcomes the latecomer and graciously asks her to sit
She walks very slowly down the aisle, her high heels clip clopping on the wood floor and she sits on the front row to the left.( where a seat has been reserved for her)

The service resumes ........with everyone muttering in stage whispers
" Who is she ?" 

( The Mystery guest may also be a similarly dressed man but That me be a difficult find at short notice )

Shouting Into The Wind


We all need to feel that we have some sort of voice in this strange world we call life.
One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.      
Bryant H. McGill

Surprise Cock


After nights I found a cornflakes box just inside the front gate
In it was a tall and VERY angry red and black adult cockerel
He has one in sours and knows how to use them.
It took me three attempts with a pair of baby blue oven gloves to get him out of the box and into the shed.
There I have left him with a bowl of porridge oats and Albert's water dish.
It's been two years at least since someone has dumped their unwanted fowl on me.
I just can't be arsed this morning as I am tired so...I'm going to soddin bed




Quotes of The Day


Mrs Trellis never puts her bobble hat on properly
It's one of her little foibles
She wears it straight up, pixie style, with the Pom Pom erect as if starched
Can you starch wool, I wondered as I approached
She was standing on her front lawn when I saw her and she looked cross
" My Lawn's a martyr to moles" she sighed cryptically

Trendy Carol ( lovely winter coat in brown btw) is worried too. Her lovely Welsh terrier Seren is poorly and is awaiting blood tests. I told her to text me when she has some news.

Mr and Mrs W, I saw as they emptied their car boot of groceries. Both complained that they haven't seen me for a while.
I apologied and Mrs W whispered that she was having Botox treatment for a dicky bladder the following week
" I 'm up eight times a night at the moment  !" She ventured
I sympathised  as I am only up twice

We have a new postman. He seems cheerful enough but I did catch him sticking two fingers up at Mary this afternoon as she barked at him through the window

really?


The only person I spoke to today was neighbour Mandy
As usual she was rushing to get somewhere
"Any News?" She called out as she shot past the cottage
" I'm making a fat horse in pottery class " I shouted from Bluebell's bumper
Mandy stopped short with a puzzled look upon her face
" Really? " she said
"Yes!!!! the legs are a bit stubby but I'm rather proud of the rest!!" 
" Really?" Mandy called out again
" Yes!!! It does look more like a Shetland pony though" 
Mandy then laughed loudly and before she darted up they lane she shouted over her shoulder
"That's good ....I had a turn for a moment as I thought you said you'd made a fat whore!" 

Spring Cleaning



The Sooty cupboards are now empty and the mortuary type black plastic rubbish bags are in growing lines outside the backdoor.
Papers have been read and filed
Christmas decorations of happier times wiped clean and boxed.
It's therapy time for the old and the unused.
Old photographs will be posted away tomorrow.
I buffed the silver teapot my mother gave to me when she was drunk until it gleamed
And the Virgin Mary sent to me by Charles in the south of France has been dusted.
I'm not religious but I can't quite place her in the unwanted bin...it wouldn't seem right.
Twelve shelves in two faded green cupboards
57 years of someone's life
School reports, nursing certificates, and a graceful Staffordshire flatback greyhound bought from a Lincolnshire antique shop one romantic Sunday.
I polished him and placed him in the window
A Garfield with sooty eyes still smelling very slightly of 1980s perfume
Old pens, a screwdriver with a Scotty dog bitten handle
A pebble in the shape of a heart
£3.42 in change
16 old batteries
A cheap vase my grandmother once held, I saved that....
I could go on ..........
But I haven't the time




A Herd Of Fat Ponies

My pony is the rear one

 My sisters and I glazed our little fat ponies at pottery today. Mine should turn out a pleasing Art Deco earthenware green.
He will be ready next week
My sisters made heart shaped bowls while I messily fashioned a new cat bowl for Albert ( complete with his name on it !!!!)
Before class I went to the funeral of my Ally mcBeal patient. The dogs sat in Bluebell as I sat in the back row of the crematorium and I cuddled them when we went for a walk after the service.
The last time I sat on the back row of a crem was at my father in laws funeral and it was hard to have the reminder
I never wanted to sit in the cheap seats ever again

I fell asleep in the cottage arm chair when I got home and bloody well missed Choir which annoyed me
I woke up with clay in my beard, with it splattered on my trousers and with it dotted on the bridge of my spectacles


Oh, my love, my darling
I've hungered for your touch