Counselling Session 12 September 2023

 It went something like this…

Wily Old Irish Counsellor : “ when was the last time you bought something nice for yourself?” 
John: “I bought myself theatre tickets last week”
Wily Old Irish Counsellor: “ something to wear” she countered quickly
John: “ erm…….erm…I’m not sure” 
Wily Old Irish Counsellor “ Something that made you feel good” she fingered her bright red scarf as a kind of metaphor 
John: I can’t remember 
Silence 
More silence 
But voices in my head saying
You don’t deserve anything nice ! 
You’d only ruin it! 
Reading the room the Wily Old Irish Counsellor said “ Why wouldn’t you warrant nice clothes?”
And my silence spoke volumes.

Today I went to Mostyn Gallery and I bought an Elin Manon scarf

One of my clients noticed it today and said it was Very Me 
I laughed and agreed with her before we moved on 



56 comments:

  1. Barbara Anne5:44 pm

    Nice scarf!
    It's good that your Wily Old Irish Counsellor has taken residence in your head so you heard her whisper, "Nice scarf! It is so you that you should buy it. Why? You're worthwhile and always have been."

    Hugs!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think you were actually there at the gallery with me

      Delete
    2. That would have been fun!

      Hugs!

      Delete
  2. Anonymous6:06 pm

    Very nice scarf, see, someone gave you a well deserved compliment. Now some very nice shoes. I don't mean nurses Crocs. Nice comfortable shoes. XX gigi

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Perhaps a Christmas gift lol

      Delete
    2. And eyeglasses with style, not from Amazon. You deserve to look your best! ♥️♥️♥️

      Delete
  3. Replies
    1. I loved it and it was so soft

      Delete
    2. Barbara Anne12:06 am

      Do you need one or more soft neck warming scarfs in other colors or patterns? You deserve a variety!

      Hugs!

      Delete
  4. Anonymous6:28 pm

    That made me cry

    Lee

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous6:29 pm

    Very natty John with a poignant back story and of course you are worth it, enjoy. Jan in Castle Gresley

    ReplyDelete
  6. And as well as looking stylish, it'll keep the chill wind off your neck! Nice that someone noticed, but that's not really important, it's just for you, because you're worth it! xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. With my plain new blue jumper I looked every bit acounsellor

      Delete
  7. Both your wily old irish counselor and your patient are right. The voices inside your head are wrong. Tell them to fuck off:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. By buying the scarf I did just that x

      Delete
  8. Sartorial elegance suits you!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Yorkshire Liz6:49 pm

    Every sympathy, John. I am just the same. Tell yourself you are going for a new you......and new gear is Christmas presents to yourself!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I needed to say , I deserve that scarf

      Delete
  10. Im very interested in why you can buy nice things for your home but not to wear.
    Anyway, enjoy your lovely new accessory!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well, I agree with your Irish Counsellor and your client. You are worthy of nice things and the scarf looks nice on you.

    Will Jay

    ReplyDelete
  12. You are worthy, treat yourself like the treasure you are. Loving yourself, opens the door to love.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And open to a nice scarf….ieven folded it when I got home

      Delete
  13. I'm 70 and only just learning to buy myself nice things.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous9:36 pm

    It is a lovely scarf and suits you! I agree with the Wiley Irish Counsellor that we all need to buy something nice as a treat for ourselves, every now & again! Even if it is from a charity shop! So glad you treated yourself it boosts morale no end!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Has Eleanor seen it yet?

    ReplyDelete
  16. How beautiful and you look so confident and happy in it. You deserve the best. It is so pleasing to see you doing well.

    lizzy x

    ReplyDelete
  17. Well,yay, John!!!

    ReplyDelete
  18. She knows you well!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Anonymous1:05 am

    Love your scarf! Cali

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous1:27 am

    Looking good!
    weavinfool

    ReplyDelete
  21. Love the scarf and thank you - you know why!

    ReplyDelete
  22. It looks good and feels good. And it absolutely suits you.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I would rather go out half-naked than without a scarf. Your new one looks very chic.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Nice work! Beautiful scarf and it suits you perfectly.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Anonymous9:27 am

    You can't remember when you last bought something to wear? What about the new sweaters you mentioned recently?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They were utilitarian , and this post was set in 2023

      Delete
    2. Anonymous5:07 pm

      You said you bought new sweaters when you became a counsellor, it was to be your new image, how you thought a coounsellor should look.

      Delete
    3. Black and white sigh

      Delete
  26. Anonymous12:02 pm

    Hmm, John. Got me to thinking. I do buy nice things for myself, just not really clothes. ( I LOVE shoes, I mean LOVE them, and must have all the shoes. I love art supplies, and must have all the supplies.) I live in ratty tee shirts and yoga pants, or in summer, shorts and skorts. I ruin most any shirt - with paint, food, glue or something. When it's time to go places with friends, I have to find the least ratty shirt, fret about it, but say fuck it and off I go. My thoughts are that I am retired, why do I need a whole wardrobe like I had when I worked in an office? Perhaps I am too far on the other side now! I do think it's a reflection of self worth. My Hubs has a wardrobe like NO man I've ever seen, and always looks so well put together. And here I am, a sloppy thing most days. Maybe I need a few pretties, so I don't feel like a character in a Dickens novel when I leave the house.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Anonymous1:33 pm

    That's a very nice scarf. I'm knitting myself a jumper at the moment, it's not particularly smart but it's cosy and warm, a treat to myself, we all need that x
    Alison in Devon x

    ReplyDelete
  28. I can relate. I once balked at getting an expensive jacket for Christmas as I felt it would be more of a burden than anything I would really get any joy out of.

    ReplyDelete
  29. You really do have to love a counsellor that can read your mind and fill in the blanks. Lovely scarf ... the beginning of a whole new image perhaps? As long as you go back to scruffs at home so not too much gets spilled on the new togs. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  30. Anonymous4:43 pm

    Congratulations on this milestone! But I have to warn you to get it into a drawer when you get home - cats can/do major damage to knitwear. Ask me how I know...

    ReplyDelete
  31. Krayolakris6:05 pm

    A few solid color jumpers and a handful of scarves and cowls make for a very nice wardrobe for work or elsewhere. I still go for my oldest ratty sweatshirts when at home ha!

    ReplyDelete
  32. I wear what makes me feel me, sometimes I get comments - usually positive. You can tell when I'm not in a good place because I stop wearing things I like.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Anonymous2:02 pm

    Thank you for this post. It resonated with me so much. I buy work clothes and things for the house and that’s it.
    I’ve just treated myself to a ridiculous (long coveted) pair of sequined Dr Martens because of your writing.
    Wore them on the staff night out last night and I felt fabulous - I may have looked like mutton dressed as lamb but I didn’t care. ❤️

    ReplyDelete

I love all comments Except abusive ones from arseholes