Wednesday, 11 October 2017

Pandora's Box


When the Harvey Weinstein furore first broke in the news, I was initially dreadfully confused as the thought of him sexually molesting any A list actress seemed awfully far fetched to me.
It was only then that I realised that I thought the press was talking about Harvey Fierstein the gay actor and not the slug like movie producer Weinstein .
Hey ho!

The abuse of power for sexual gratification, once again has been given centre stage by the media and although I suspect 90% of women at one time or another have been subjected to varying degrees of unwanted " attention" , either in the workplace or in education , the phenomenon is not purely confined to female victims and male protagonists.

When I was a student nurse I once was subjected to some low level sexual " horseplay" by two female enrolled nurses. It lasted for twelve weeks ( the length of a placement on the ward I had been allocated to) and it was an unpleasant, and upsetting time to live through.

The two women in question were  just a little older than I and they thought the whole thing was great fun, especially as I was a real shy blusher and they egged each other on.
The horseplay started with hair roughing and unwanted hugging, but as they saw that I was quietly flummoxed by it all, their actions graduated to unexpected groping, the dreadfully embarrassing " grabbing of the back of the underpants and pulling" moments and kisses on the back of the neck.

The thought it was in anyway abuse, never crossed my mind or the minds of the other staff who witnessed it but It was a truly awful time, and it made me miserable, even though way back then then it was chalked up to commonplace workplace " banter" which had to endured by the grunts.

Thank goodness, things have moved on from then
Worryingly in Hollywood that doesn't quite seem the case.

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I shall leave you with this video which has nothing to do with sexual abuse  but which has everything to do with the general abuse of animals.
Chimpanzees that have been laboratory raised, see " freedom" for the first time
Watch this video without bawling




57 comments:

  1. The most bizarre thing I ever saw was done by an unpaid, adult, female student who was in the workplace to gain experience. She goosed the (female)owner of the company in full view of all staff at the daily staff update meeting.

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    1. Can I ask what 'goosed' means. I haven't heard it before

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    2. I think it's when one's butt is grabbed.

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    3. Among other things

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    4. a hand reaches through the legs from behind and a finger goes right up in the area of the vulva. It's quite invasive

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  2. My husband who is an electrician used to dread going into factories where there were a lot of women working together , he said the talk was so dirty it made him blush and you didn't hang around especially on your own .

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    1. I hated working in all male or all female workplaces

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  3. yes, I've been there; and abuse in ANY form by ANYONE to another (human or animal) should be grounds for extermination of the abuser!

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  4. When I was eighteen, one of my male colleagues decided it would be a good idea to rip open my popper fronted dress. I screamed as loud as I could, hoping someone was upstairs (it was during a lunch break and I wasn't sure if anyone was still in the building). It worked, I think I scared him off by the sheer volume. It was very upsetting, but didn't tell anyone, as I was embarrassed and thought he'd probably deny it. If I were eighteen now, I would kick him in the balls! Yes, the video had me in tears, just thinking what kind of previous life these poor animals must have had. Their movements and expressions are so much like ours, you can imagine what's going on in their minds. The cruelty of humankind.

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    1. I think nowadays people generally understand how far to take things.....bloody hell they should do

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  5. Other people do not exist for our amusement or for our sexual titillation. They are not objects. They are sentient beings just like us and deserve our respect.

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    1. Well said...but sadly not everyone understands such statements

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    2. I couldn't agree more.

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  6. As a male, you probably don't even know half of it, and nor do I. My heart does not bleed for men who suffer sexual harassment. Great video, but no tears here as it was so positive.

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  7. It is good to hear people speaking out, it is not easy to speak out.

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  8. I am not sure just how far things have moved on John - there are still pockets of it around, I suspect country areas such as where I live - and probably where you live, are a little behind the times. The fact is that nobody should put up with it and should say something to somebody immediately - and if necessary go to the police.

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  9. Poor Harvey Fierstein. You're not the only one to get the names confused. This scandal shows how little power women have, even A-listers in Hollywood were afraid to come forward. My immediate reaction was, How is this possible? Can't believe the thought even crossed my mind.

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  10. People have nothing better to do? They were lacking any form of a life. And those poor chimps....you just want to hold them and tell them they are loved. I see all the abused animals on the internet and you do cry....

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  11. Poor .little critters. They didn't know what to make of all that space and freedom. Still cagd...but at least there was fresh air.
    Harvey W.? Your description of him as a slug is perfect. You know, it never ocurred to me that men might suffer sexual harassment....how very 'vintage' of me. It is NEVER right no matter who does it or to whom it is done.

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  12. Power over people (and creatures) often leads to abuse. We have all been there.

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    1. Well said and your right we have all been there.

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  13. I LOVE THAT VIDEO!! Happy Chimps!! Some people are so kind it gives me hope in these shitty times.

    Power is a helluva drug. A well known actor here in the States, Terry Crews, spoke up about his abuse to stand by Harvey's victims.
    https://jezebel.com/terry-crews-says-he-was-groped-by-a-high-level-hollywoo-1819340883

    The best thing he says though is it is not just Hollywood. And most of us know this and hate it and have been exposed to abuse.
    Sadder still is it seems lots of Americans believe the victims asked for it, should have fought back and got what they deserved. How else could we explain the Orange haired bastard, who likes to "grab 'em by the pussy" as our President??

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    1. Yes, that lockerroom " banter" cheapened the US presidency

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  14. That is a very powerful video of the chimps. You can sense the wonder and fear they are feeling. Sun and fresh air, just the simple things.

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  15. Imagine me, a cute little 20 year old, living and working in Hollywood California .. in those days .. all of this bad behavior was common and no one ever would go to the police or a lawyer ..
    I worked for a Hollywood Management Agency ... luckily for me, the bosses thought of me as one of the "kids" so I was flirted with but no one touched me.
    What a world ...

    the chimpanzee video breaks my heart ..

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  16. I was a very shy young man; the classic issue of an all male school. I was the perfect target for older women to play with; it was painful, but I didn't run to a lawyer.

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  17. If man was indeed created in a god's image, then that god is a well effed up.
    I'm sorry. That's all I have to say about the subject of abuse right now, whatever form it comes in.

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    1. My theory is that God should have taken day 6 off, he was clearly too knackered having created the universe, land, sea and all the animals to produce something without a mega defect!

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  18. Re:nurses They should have been sacked, then arrested, for sexual assault. But, of course, 'back then' management, unions, police, didn't give a shit. Equally alarming, is that if they felt free to treat a colleague like that what were they doing to vulnerable patients?

    Re:chimps They were freed, in 2011, after 30 years of remorseless - and ultimately futile - experiments, trying to find a cure for HIV. How sickening, and ironic.

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    1. I didn't know the chimp history,the bit where the chimps hug at the door, overwhelmed with the view, broke my heart

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  19. In my opinion, both stories of terrible abuse. I's sorry you had to go through that John. People sometimes don't think of guys being abused, straight or gay, but it happens. Poor chimps.. I know there has to be research for cures but isn't there a better way?

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    1. I was embarrassed that was all....and it made me a little tougher

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  20. I also thought they were talking about Harvey Fierstein and wondered how that could be possible....

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  21. It's terrible, but my reaction to the Harvey Weinstein story was, "Well, of COURSE he was sexually harassing actresses." I mean, just LOOKING at Harvey Weinstein repulsively brings to mind the "casting couch," doesn't it?

    That chimpanzee video is beautiful. The real question is, how is it possible in this day and age that it's legal to imprison chimps for 30 years in a lab and never let them outside?

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    1. Perhaps, like operation yew tree in the U.K. The shit will now hit the fan big style in the US....ripples that may reach the Whitehouse

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  22. I don't understand why everyone was so shocked. Because someone is a power figure, does not make them immune.

    Awesome video!

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  23. Oh John those poor creatures. A sentence with the words animals and experiments in it makes my stomach churn. I sometimes think that the human race doesn't deserve this planet.
    Jean

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  24. I grew up in the '50s/60's and I put up with a fair amount of this sort of 'banter' mind you I was a slapper, no I don't mean a trollop. If I felt things were going to fair had no hesitation in lashing out and slapping someone around the face. I also spoke out in the cinema when the man sat beside me started playing with himself by shouting 'put that away you dirty pig'.. and on the tube when some one started frotting I shouted, 'stop rubbing yourself against me'. You would think my big mouth would have got me in to trouble but it never did. Every single time the perpetrator shuffled away. Beware the wrath of a shortarse!

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    1. You sound like Miriam Margolyes!

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    2. I look a bit like her too!

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    3. Ah, to have your chutzpah! When crap like that occured to me/near me, I would usually be too stunned to speak.

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  25. We (humans) have been abusing
    other animals for bloody ever
    in the name of science to better
    our own lives.
    None of it has made us any better!
    Like Shrimpton........ I believe
    this planet might just be better off
    in the hands of the kinder animals.

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    1. Unfortunately animals are cruel without ever knowing they are. Nature by definition is cruel

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  26. The glitterati have been very slow in coming forward about their abuser even though it seems to be that it was known to many if not all for years, sister to sister, they let them go, little lambs to the slaughter. Shame they didn't stand up and condemn him in their Oscar speeches years ago. Instead they praised him for the wonderful roles they played. It is a funny old world.

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    1. Trouble is, Rachel, and I agree with your general sentiment, that the casting couch is as old as the hills. Ask Marilyn Monroe et al. Not that I am suggesting that actors and actresses sleep their way to the top. Not at all. Yet look at the rent boys in the industry. Some of their autobiographies (after they've "made" it) make for enlightening reading.

      I dare say, with an aside to John, that Bette Davis and Lauren Bacall won't have stooped so low to get where they ended up.

      Tragedy, fact of life, that so many dare not bite the hand that promises to feed them. Emphasis on "promises". My father, he and his closest friends working in various media, gave me one hell of an education of how not to be duped. At the time (I was in my teens), I had no idea what he was talking about. As it is, maybe by absorbing what he said by osmosis, I came away with not a hair out of place. Which isn't difficult since my hair is unruly.

      U

      PS Before I forget: Nice to hear your voice the other day.

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    2. In the NHS whistle blowing does not happen because people are fearful of losing their jobs...actors are no different I guess

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    3. My voice was on my blog reading a poem in case anyone is wondering.

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    4. I think it may have started a craze

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    5. Ursula was impressed

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  27. Power corrupts - and absolute power corrups absolutely.
    Not surprised at the Harvey Weinstein thing. Not suprised at those poor chimps. Appalled at the uses power has been put to in both cases.
    And glad to see some light at the end of the tunnel (in both caes).

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  28. I cried at the chimp video. Cried again at the video that came up immediately after it, the release of beagle dogs who had spent their lifetime being tortured in the name of science.

    I'm sitting here with my loving old dog pressed against me and I feel sickened by the human race.

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  29. The same sort of humans rescued both kind of animals chin up x

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    1. Thankful that there are some humane humans. Yes chin up, or chins in my case!

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  30. Prominent public figures seem to think sexual harassment is part of the job description. And they rely on other people being too embarrassed or fearful for their jobs to speak up. Then suddenly someone does speak up and they're like a rabbit caught in the headlights.

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