Wednesday, 5 July 2017

I Shouldn't Be Let Out!


I am pretty good at not snacking between meals.
But occasionally I just need to eat something savoury, just to placate the pangs of hunger when I am out and about.
Yesterday I got my salt fix from a packet of tesco snack a jacks, which for those that don't know,sort of resemble vinegar flavoured  sanitary pads or cavity wound dressings in so much as they are strange    Polystyrene like snacks that fill you but do little else! 
I ate several packs when I was waiting in the queue at the post office  
Not a problem I hear you say
Well I would generally agree, but as I stood third in line, I caught myself in a magnificent sneeze and peppered the  heads of two women in front of me with what could only be described as a food/ sputum confetti. 

63 comments:

  1. The shame was increased when one of the women called me a " dirty bastard"

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    1. You keep a lovely clean house though :)

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  2. but did you fart at the same time?

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  3. I hope not there wre people behind me

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  4. Ha ha, that made me laugh, in fact so much so, the dog, who was sat on my knee jumped, I screamed as she stood on my knee (had knee op Saturday), and my daughter came running up the stairs, thinking I had fallen, now quite fancy some Snack a Jacks !!xx

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    1. Dont bother they really do taste of shite

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  5. the post title says it all. it's correct! :)

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  6. Why am I not surprised? Are you sure Miranda Hart isn't your long lost sister?

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  7. I didn't know you could get vinegar flavoured sanitary pads.

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    Replies
    1. They're to go with the fish flavoured ones.

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    2. I won't make the 'batter' joke - again.

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    3. Please do....i am in need of lightness today

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    4. I won't talk about the velcro sanitary towel unless you really want me to...

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  8. How odd. Someone who is renowned for always having weird things to eat brought a packet of them into the pub yesterday. I ate one for the first - and last - time.

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    1. I like the vinegar and salt " hit" ...perhaps i should get some old chip paper and lick it

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  9. When following a proper diet, there shouldn"t be any "pangs of hunger". That's why we're told to eat small and often, not three meals a day; that's why we're told to have some protein with every meal: an egg, a piece of fish/meat/sardin. Protein is said to eliminate the feeling of hunger.
    Occasionally, though, one could eat whatever one fancies, but should consider the calories.

    Sometimes,it so happens that I buy certain french pastries at 30% discount - end of the day at the supermarket.Can't resist them. Well, on the day I eat some of these quite filling pastries, I won't eat anything else, so the calorie count stays stable.

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    1. Duta... My pangs are purely psychological!

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  10. If we ever meet, I'll stand beside or behind you ... just to be safe if you're between meal snacking.

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    Replies
    1. Behind me is not the bestbof places either!

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  11. You're obviously allergic to them!

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  12. Gawd, you're a public menace!

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  13. Oh dear. I'd suggest you carry an umbrella with you at all times, but that's frightfully unlucky indoors if it's unfurled. Then again, for the poor ladies ahead of you...

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  14. Oh man, that made me laugh!

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  15. That was your system rejecting that disgusting junk...unfortunately, all over those unsuspecting ladies ahead of you. .

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  16. Oh John, I'm not sure you should really be let out on your own - well not with a packet of Snack a Jacks anyway ! Hope the ladies ahead of you had not just been to have their hair done.

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  17. Wot no scotch eggs?

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    Replies
    1. I havent had one since i started fat club!

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  18. What the heck? You are a nurse! Don't they teach you how to sneeze into your elbow?

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  19. Aw nuts... what I usually snack on... but, unlike you, I don't share.

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  20. Oh John, that's so funny, poor you.

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  21. As above you would be better with a handful of nuts. Also chopped raw carrots fill you up. I always carry a bag around with me. Those snack a jacks are rice cakes and are on a par with Ryvita in the cardboard catergory Yuk!!!

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    1. There is nothing better than a handful of nuts

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    2. *snort*just as well I didn't have a mouthful of tea when I read this!

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  22. You are trying too hard to make yourself look disgusting . lol

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    Replies
    1. Oh no i am not ask The Prof

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  23. Oh John, you do make me laugh. By the way, I retired last week. We are the same age!

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  24. Sometimes a sneeze just hits so fast and - kablooey! It happens.

    I actually like the rice cakes we get here but there's no eating just a handful if they have salt and vinegar on them. Might as well have a bag of s&v chips (crisps over there!) and get the urge over with :)

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  25. As part of your slimming plan John this sounds like a real fall from grace.

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    Replies
    1. Whats new pat..im such a let down

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  26. I will agree with the Weaver, if you also ate chocolates with the chips .. the sweet and salty are irresistible ...

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  27. Ewwww! Your apologies were accepted, I presume, as you are still t liberty! I've been put on a high dose of prednisone and wow, do I have to control myself. Staying out of the house and the kitchen is the only way of coping in the late afternoon, so I'm going for a walk. Cravings are the very devil. You have my sympathy. And you've done so well, ....back on the horse today John. You can do it.

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  28. Too much information, lol! I snack all the time but somehow manage to stay the same weight. Maybe it's my constant low-level anxiety that burns up whatever I eat.

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  30. I have to agree..today was the day to stay home. Wish i had..my sister and i are at the baseball park..the heat index has to be 100.and i wish some would spit on me..might cool things off a bit.

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  31. Not "Snack a Pax" but "Spray a Grays"!

    "Do you mind sir! You appear to have showered me with Rice Krispies!"

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  32. That s disgusting, both the food and your spraying. Fresh veg make a healthier snack, btw.

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    1. Well that's telling me! I hang my head in shame

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    2. Then you peek up flirtatiously thru your eyelashes. lol.
      PS It's also rude to eat in public.

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    3. In my family, No On Eats Out In Public, you sit down somewhere proper and "eat like a person" .. lol ..
      Thank you to my Great Grandmother who was born in England and brought every single rule of the dinner table with her.

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    4. Your GGrandmother was correct. Look at what happened to the ladies in front of John!

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  33. Very funny, John. I'm a diabetic, always hungry, so I carry a small bag of mix nuts with me.

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    1. You could have someone's eye out if you cough x

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    2. speaking of mixed nuts ......

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  34. Reminds me of the time my friend and I at Chelsea flower show accidently squirted orange juice on the coat of the woman in front. We were helpless with laughter and nearly wet ourselves sniggering. Must be a nurse thing.

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  35. Haha ... trust you!!

    That reminds me of the time my ex was fighting to open a big bag of peanut M & Ms at the cinema, eventually the bag opened with such force and out flew a few of the rather large sweets high into the air ... one of them landing directly on the top of the head of a lady a few rows in front of us. How we kept straight faces while she looked around for the culprit I'll never know.

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