Monday, 7 November 2016

The Queen Mary's Hooter


The Prof is away most of the week again and I am presently clearing out the crap from the kitchen cupboards. It's a day to be alone.
Yesterday I made a massive pan of pea and ham soup.
Both the Prof and I are paying for this today!
We had three bowls each for supper
I ventured outside this morning to round up the bantams who had spent most of the morning in the front garden in a successful effort to keep out of the way of the feral cat stalking them in the Ukrainian village. I left George to chase away the cat when I shooed the birds back. Every time I bent over I let out a pea smelling fart which could of put the Queen Mary's hooter to shame.
" it's cold today!" I called over to neighbour Mike who was trimming his shrubbery
" aye.." He said with a deadpan face " and a bit windy too!"

55 comments:

  1. I thought I'd heard something!

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    Replies
    1. I thought I smelled something...and it wasn't roses!

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  2. Ha, ha, remember when I described your village as idyllic with a story book setting? Maybe not so much yesterday! (ham and pea soup is so very good, however) -Jenn

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  3. Peas , peas, good for your heart ... the more you eat the more you f**t.

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    1. Second verse to...Beans, beans, the musical fruit. Themore you eat, the more you toot! (Thanks, Dad)

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    2. LOL, we have a lot to thank our Dads for :)

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  4. I find Chicken Tikka farts particularly pungent.

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  5. Replies
    1. Better than phones

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    2. I have had two phone posts in reasonable memory. How many times has your arse or its various products featured on this illustrious blog?

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    3. You like rounding up numbers when it comes to followers, so you'd better do another post on your posterior.

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    4. Now THERES a thiught

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  6. I bet it didn't smell of peas..........!

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  7. Haha .... that was a real laugh out loud moment as I read the last line .... I woke Rosy up!!

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  8. Ham and pea soup. Yum.

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  9. And the Prof might be enlivening the classroom. Don't let anyone light a match near you today. Cheers MrToot.

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  10. And the Prof might be enlivening the classroom. Don't let anyone light a match near you today. Cheers MrToot.

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    1. Milli he doesn't do teaching.... He's head of the school of health studies so he's an academic Clinton !

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  11. The toot heard 'round the world. Thanks for the laugh this morning. Much needed here in the US as tomorrow is election day.

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  12. Replies
    1. It's been said before and will be said again

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  13. LOL -- at least your neighbors have a good sense of humor!

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    Replies
    1. They HAVE TO HAVE me thinks

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  14. Well isn't that something....I made ham and pea soup on Saturday. However, we confined ourselves to one mug each. Experience you know.

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  15. Salvador Dali was not only a genius but also a great believer in farting. You're in good company John.

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    Replies
    1. Hummm the only think I liked about him was his moustache

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  16. Three bowls ... What were you thinking?

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  17. Ever hear of Joseph Pujol (Le Petomane) the fartiste?

    http://www.thehumanmarvels.com/le-petomane-the-fartiste/

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    Replies
    1. Indeed I have...a true artist!

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  18. It's always fun when you find that magical combination. I get the best results from big chunks of onion and pepper - especially when they're in a takeaway chicken peshwari.
    No matter how old you get, farts never stop being funny.

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    Replies
    1. Sharing fart making material...oh god GOING GENTLY has hit a new low

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    2. cabbage salad and warm beer

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  19. Grown men and fart jokes. Why?! :)

    My husband will laugh himself silly over this post when I show it to him. He says the same thing Dave just said, about how "farts never stop being funny". It must be a Y chromosome thing!

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    Replies
    1. nope; farts cross gender lines. they awaken the 12 year old boy inside me.

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    2. I once heard a nun fart, it was in the Nat West Bank in Rhyl in 1980. I had to be lead away from the counter hysterics

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  20. Nothing us Brits like more than a bit of toilet humour. Good thing it wasnt brussel sprout soup!

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    1. Made sprout curry as an experiment once, expecting fallout of biblical proportions. Result? Nothing. Most disappointing.

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  21. I thought only women trimmed their shrubbery! I think working in the NHS leads to a odd sense of humour. Mine is dirty and somewhat dark.

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    Replies
    1. Your humour or your shrubbery?

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  22. Peas hm? Always best avoided if you are going anywhere near to company. Obviously a good day for being alone.

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  23. I suggest that Trelawnyd should be renamed Trumpton. Who knows, you might even get a special visit from President Trump.

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  24. God help them if he gets in

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    Replies
    1. I bet Trump's trumps are especially noisy and smelly. Yours would be sweetly aromatic in comparison.

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    2. spouse and I are gonna make DAMN SURE that president rump ain't gonna happen!

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  25. Thanks, I needed the laugh!

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  26. You should try diabetic boiled sweets. Dear me...explosive. There is a warning on the packet saying don't eat too many as they have a laxative effect! Honestly.

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  27. I just had the best laugh. Thank You so much, just what I needed.

    cheers, parsnip

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  28. better out than in!!

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