Saturday, 17 September 2016

The Challenge

Even though she can't now comment, I am sure this blog entry will get Petra's " untouched-by-a-man's-hand" knickers in a twist as I am going all saccharine about something.
Go stew Petra! For what you are about to read is all true!
Hey ho.

Anyhow whilst the Prof is marking a PhD thesis up in his study, I am presently on mattress watch. For the first time in 16 years we havebought a new mattress and it's being delivered today. For a small fee, the company will collect the old one but only if it is " sealed" in a plastic bag which they thoughtfully have provided.
What are we a bio hazard? Answers on a post card.
Grid watch

Mary is on " heightened alert" at the moment and is not sleeping. She cornered a mouse down the patio grid yesterday and spend the entire day watching it. After many hours she eventually caught and partially ate it causing the Prof to swoon somewhat theatrically in disgust when he side stepped the corpse when he got home.
She has been hyperactive ever since.
The Prof on the other hand keeps repeating the shrill phrase of " don't let her lick your face" when she comes near.
He worries so.


Ann & Terry

Anyhow , as usual I am digressing.
Because of PhD marking, mattress delivery and a row about cleaning the fluff from under the old bed, I took Mary on her powerwalk early .
And we bumped into Ann and Terry.
Now Ann and Terry are the most sweet natured of couples for they spend most of their waking day laughing at and seeing the good in most things. They are a blessed asset to the flower show committee as they seldom complain, they work hard and are able to turn most negatives into a positive.
For years now I have gone head-to-head with Terry in tbe baking classes and have soundly thrashed him for several years in our own " bake off" but next year, as Terry explained after we met this morning, would be a very different event.

" Next year we are both entering the art section !" He challenged cheerfully
"A  Hand made item out of wood! , a cross stitch or embroidery and a painting ! That's the contest"

Bloody hell embroidery? Woodwork? PAINTING,! I'm fucking crap at anything like that!

I'm scuppered!

Ps
Ifyou want a laugh read this
https://roadtokazakhstan.blogspot.co.uk/2016/09/for-one-day-only.html

48 comments:

  1. Bribe TS to do something for you; just add your name on the bottom.

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  2. I guess you've got about 11 months to prepare for the challenge. Which of those categories would be Terry's strongest suit?

    Best of luck...and enjoy the new mattress.

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  3. There's got to be a YouTube video you can watch to learn how to do one of those things. Can you still buy "Paint by Numbers" kits? Did you spring for the posture-pedic memory foam ultra everything mattress? -Jenn

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  4. Woodwork or painting classes for you then this winter John.

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  5. I can't wait to see what kind of crafts you come up with. Oh, happy day.

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  6. I was sure when you dropped the dogs off you said you were going to John Lewis...

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  7. What a beautiful couple! I have no suggestions regarding art.

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  8. you can enter one of my knitting projects as your own...

    ann & terry look like a fun couple to know. have fun trying out the new mattress tonight (bouncy bouncy)!

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  9. Rachel is Brilliant.
    So are you and the Prof. The jury is still out on the dogs.

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    Replies
    1. You are kindest itself Candice. The kindest of allxxx

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  10. Doggy foot prints in paint, a cat wrapped up in yarn, and a fancy chicken house - that works out. Bagging the mattress, they are trying to avoid bugs in the delivery truck.

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  11. Haven't you got an old, threadbare towel you can throw in?

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  12. Who judges the art and crafts? !

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  13. Is this the challenge that makes you move to another village/town?
    One of our dogs is obsessing about some animal that used to be under our deck. Maybe its ghost remains.

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  14. Now, you'll have to think up what you'll do and not mention in your blog - I'm sure they read it. Have a go at youtube for ideas.

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  15. After reading about all the animals relieving themselves on your bed over the years, I wouldn't touch your old mattress if it were sealed in a block of lead. Bio-hazard must be an underestimate of the risk-assessment.

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    1. Hahaha! I bet the delivery men are readers of this blog!

      Jo in Auckland, NZ

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  16. Something made of wood? Hmm...a decorative chicken coop? A sweet little table with holes cut inn it for dog dishes? Bird feeder? You can do it John.

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  17. When I got a new mattress, the delivery men put the old one in a plastic bag, while wearing gloves and masks. Frankly, I thought it was overkill.

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  18. Mary, what a scamp!
    When I first read that about the baking contest...I read barking contest. For a second I thought - gawd that would be hysterical!
    But now I think the art one might be just as much fun.

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  19. I'll do one of my drawings for you.

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    Replies
    1. Thats me lost then

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    2. Ooh look! He's replied to Rachel!!!!!!!!!!

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    3. Your negativity is draining

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  20. My little long-haired Chihuahua, Kelso, is very brave outside when it comes to hunting lizards, but yesterday he was reduced to a quivering mass of jelly by a rather large housefly in the bedroom. I had to show him the corpse after I'd dispatched it with the fly swatter. He seemed satisfied.

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    Replies
    1. What is it with dogs and flies? Amber, our first greyhound, used to run and hide when one started buzzing around the living room, and Matty (our current greyhound) watches them very uneasily!

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    2. I know! I think maybe it's because the flies try to get into their ears and eyes. Kelso hides under the bed so the dust ruffle protects him like mosquito netting. I really hate to see him so terrified over something so (to me) innocuous. :(

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    3. LOL!! TTPT...a long time ago we had a borzoi. And God bless her she tried so hard to get little lol and hide from thunder and lightening.
      My husband would sit on the floor with her and tell her stories about Brave Dogs.
      The stories were always so funny I would be laughing and that made the dog happy. Win win!!

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  21. Get a large canvas, throw paint at it with a teaspoon .. get a small paint brush and paint swipes of bold colors all over the thing and call it Modern.
    You will win something with Gold Ribbons on it.

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  22. Regarding the old mattress. It is possible that either you, Chris or both of you have done Donald Trumps while sleeping upon it. This will have imbued said mattress with microscopic traces of noxious gases which could be injurious to the health of innocent delivery men.

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  23. Ann and Terry have smiling eyes!
    Nice to have them around in the mix with the "Petra types!"

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  24. Beadwork. Easy, thread a large needle and adds beads. Easy as one, two, three.

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  25. Regarding the Mattress


    Do you think it was all the blood stains and bullet holes that did it ?

    LOL ... credit to my husband who donated his old VW to the veterans. He left it on the street instead of in our driveway.
    The next day he went out to see if the car was still there and it was, minus windshield and with the addition of bullet holes in the doors.
    Ahhh. life in NYC could be surprising sometimes.

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  26. You may surprise yourself John. I don’t consider myself very creative, but last winter I joined an online 30 day Creative Bootcamp consisting of mostly artists and writers. I’d never drawn anything other than doodling in classes and boring meetings. With a No. 2 pencil and computer paper, I was surprised at what I had accomplished. I never imagined that I could draw! The next Bootcamp was a 7 day event earlier this summer. I bought some watercolor paints and surprised myself again. My few paintings weren’t spectacular, but I was quite proud of what I painted with never having any type of art courses under my belt. I am looking forward to what you choose and the end product! Doesn’t the Prof knit? Maybe he can teach you a few stitches!

    Sleep well on the new mattress. I imagine the dogs will be doing a whole lot of sniffing!

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    Replies
    1. I have a plan..i am going to night class to do painting and pat the animal helper to help me with needlepoint!

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  27. Bed bugs. You bag your old mattress in case it has bed bugs and they get into the nice new mattresses on the truck for delivery.

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  28. Sewing, painting and a woodworking class....that should do it! If any of these are taught close by or you know someone who can give pointers. What a happy couple! Wipe Marys mouth out with a papertowel full of mouth wash and then give her a big slobbery smooch!

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  29. Oooh I have an idea. It is highly subversive though. I've seen fab examples of cross stitch done on wood - you drill holes in the wood in a grid only in the bits where you're going to stitch. Here's an example. BTW, I am more than happy to come judge the arts and crafts sections of the Trelawnyd flower show next year... if you pay the airfare ;-) https://gravgrav.com/collections/wooden-purse-clutch

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  30. I m siding with the Prof abut Mary and the mouse! She terrorized the poor tiny creature all day then she ate it?! That's nasty. Surely you don t train your dogs to kill anything bigger than a cockroach? I wouldn't want Mary to kiss me afterwards either. As for the contest, maybe you should stick to baking. Remember when you made the pencil jar for Prof?

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  31. Requiring you to sea your matress in a plastic bag is actually a really REALLy good thing. Bedbugs are out of countrol in many places. If the company transports an old mattress which has bed bugs in, then the bedbugs will be able to move to other mattresses in the vehicle, including new ones. Or they can temporarily hide in other things in the vehicle, moving in to mattresses when they are loaded.
    I thought I had begbugs once, so I did a lot of research to find out how they get in to the house, where they go, and how to get rid of them. I even had a bedbug company booked in, complete with sniffer dog to ensure that we identified and treated all the places in my home that had the darn things. It turned out I wasn't suffering from bedbug reaction, I had chicken pox.

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  32. Just today I heard about zentangle, meditative drawing.

    The joyful nature of Ann and Terry is so enivable!

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  33. Here's an idea...Google the textile art of Dutch artist Tilike Swartz. She makes diary pieces with simple stitched line drawings and text. She has a neatly stitched image of a toilet on the cover of her new book...can't think why,but I thought of you....

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  34. Here's an idea...Google the textile art of Dutch artist Tilike Swartz. She makes diary pieces with simple stitched line drawings and text. She has a neatly stitched image of a toilet on the cover of her new book...can't think why,but I thought of you....

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  35. I entered the cross stitch section at Emley Show (fairly big show up here)a few years ago and was awarded third and won a rosette and 50p. However these were only 3 entries. Ho hum Twiggy x

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  36. Btw I like the look of Anne and Terry, very jolly xx

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  37. Ann and Terry look like a lovely happy couple, we need a lot more like them around in these dark and negative days.

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