Sunday, 8 May 2016

" More Moviprep Darling?"


" We better get some more loo roll" 
So said The Prof in between making loud raspberry noises from the kitchen.
Never let it be said that his humour is nothing but sophisticated.
Presently I am resting my right knee on the couch. True the rest of my body is resting with it, but my knee in particular is in need of some rest and relaxation as yesterday  it has suddenly decided to swell dramatically, however, this affliction has been, somewhat over shadowed by the imminent prospect of me drinking two litres of what can only be described as, liquid nitroglycerine, prior to tomorrow's fairly innocuous sounding medical procedure - the dreaded colonoscopy. 
The liquid nitroglycerine is called moviprep and later today and tomorrow morning, because of it, I shall be spending long long periods on the loo with my ipad.
Now you can understand, just a little more, just why raspberry fart noises are emanating from the kitchen.

Apparently you can either have a "light sedation" prior to the camera's insertion  or just plump for the "gas and air" option. Gas'n air is, I am told , the choice of people that are either DEAD HARD or ones that can't rely on a responsible adult to pick them up. I am choosing the sedation route.
If it was up to me, I would prefer being comatose from this morning until tomorrow night, but unfortunately that is not a viable option, which is a pity. I wouldn't have to listen to many more toilet paper jokes if I was unconcious!
Having said this, I am trying to see the whole thing from a more humorous stance, and given the age range of Going Gently's  readership I am sure there is a score of happy bloggers who have bitten great chunks out their pillows when they have undergone similar invasive procedures and would like to share the whole process with me.

So think of me.....think of me fondly a little later today.
I shall be resting my knee as the bottom literally falls out of my world.
Hey ho

75 comments:

  1. I did some swift talking to get out of a colonoscopy recently. You have my absolute sympathy and very many good wishes.
    xo

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  2. I have heard the laxative(putting it mildly) is far far worse than the procedure. Just trying to get to the hospital had a friend of mines husband screaming that there was no way she was getting into his car (he had witnessed the bottom falling out). In the end she had to wear nappies and have the front seat covered within an inch of its life. Sorry not the sort of info you need on a sunny sunday. Good Luck

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  3. On a lighter note I have just found this and was really moved that such beauty has come out of the most dreadful adversity.
    http://www.josierussell.com/
    You may remember the dreadful beating she took whilst her mother and sister lay dead. I stumbled across this by accident and feel really moved by the gorgeous pictures she creates

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  4. Oh John. Just that. Bless you. Vx

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  5. Find humor in it, good luck.

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  6. I had my first one a few years back - with sedation. The physician complemented my bowel prep on the written report afterward. Apparently my colon was clean enough to eat off of.

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  7. My husband has had it done twice now, and trust me, the laxative is the worst part. You won't feel a thing. You should wake up feeling fine. :) Good luck!!

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  8. Endured two last year then a surgery. You have my sympathy. However, remember this...better out than in AND you'll be several pounds lighter by tomorrow! Positively svelte. X

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  9. I had a cystoscopy and adored every minute of it. Relax, you should have stayed awake. I ended up looking down the camera with the consultant.

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  10. Minor correct - shouldn't that be the world falling out of your bottom?

    I shouldn't make light of something I've yet to experience, but it seems to be the diagnostic test of choice for everything from earache to athletes foot these days.

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  11. Sedation. The prep is the worse part of the whole procedure!

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    1. Indeed! Do the ghastly prep right so they can have a good look while they are in there. You certainly don't want to have to do it again if the procedure doesn't go well!

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  12. I had to do the liquid nitroglycerin treatment for a kidney stone imaging. It was horrible. Anything after that was easy breezy, so by the time they approach you with the colon camera, the worst will be behind you.

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  13. I had one a few years ago, for me the worse thing was the totally uncaring staff who ignored me whilst jabbing a needle in the back of my hand. Getting said needle in the wrong place, 3 times, then removing it when it was in the correct place. Getting blood all over my legs and still ignoring me as they were too busy talking between themselves about their plans for the weekend.

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  15. Gotta accompany The FW tomorrow for a cystoscopy. yay. He actually asked me to be there. As I am not cruel, I agreed to go. I shall take s0me crochet to occupy my precious time.
    This past two weeks I have watched my best mate suffer in hosp and her new fiance deal with the mental agonies so sweetly, calmly and considerately that I wept later. To have such a good person in one's life is not in my remit, it seems.
    Hope tomorrow goes well for you.

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  16. I'm of an age (and more) that I should have one, and it was on the books last spring until we were so rudely interrupted by open-heart surgery. It's time to get one scheduled, so I shall look forward to your musings on the experience...

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  17. Bloody phone! I had one done in January and only needed 3 puffs of gas and air as he went across my transverse colon. I went home on 2 buses afterwards. The consultant said I was made of strong stuff, which is possible as I've given birth with no pain relief and had an ectopic pregnancy on the point of rupture which was uncomfortable rather than agonising. I think the Moviprep was worse as the consistency is quite thick and syrupy. Drink loads of fluids in addition to the moviprep- it helps to flush everything through

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  18. Hope every thing comes out alright.

    Be careful with those drugs, I have heard many secrets from sedated people!

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  19. Go to your happy place, John. Good luck.

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  20. I had a colonoscopy done three years ago and will have to have it repeated every three/four years, so another one is due soon. The prep is the worst part of it! I opted not to have sedation and honestly, didn't feel a thing - there are no nerve endings in the colon that can sense pain. I watched the whole procedure on the screen and I won't have sedation next time either.

    Just make sure you complete the prep properly so that your insides are clean enough - you don't want them to have to reschedule the procedure.

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  21. It's a great name isn't it - Moviprep? Don't be brave, have the sedation.

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  22. Praying for a good outcome "in the end".

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  23. My friend gave in to temptation and ate general tso's chicken on the day she took her prep. Of course the results were too cloudy and she had to repeat it. The prep is a lot of liquid but you do feel great after. Good luck and I hope your results are perfect.

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  24. Oh dear…soon be over! Treat yourself to a scotch egg afterwards.

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  25. NOTHING TO IT! Once you've had a couple it becomes so routine. My family is riddled with colon cancer, crohns disease, ulcerative colities and the like. I am SO SO THANKFUL for this diagnostic proceedure.

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  26. I can't really tell you how it felt because the anesthesia made me forget everything except the prep part and the needle part. Anesthesia amnesia!!

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  27. Never heard it said better . . .
    Except the bit about your leg . . .
    What's up with that!!!

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  28. I'd have to be fully unconscious - minimum!....I need gas and air for a trip to the hairdressers...

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  29. Tapping away on an i-pad while sitting on the toilet may not be very hygienic. By the way, which site will you be looking at while ensconced on your throne? ColonscopyNightmares.com?

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  30. Sedation is definitely the route to go! The colonoscopy itself is no big deal -- it's the 24 hour prep beforehand that's the misery! Good luck!

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  31. Literally shitting yourself at the prospect of a colonoscopy.
    Someone had to say it - might as well be me.

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  32. My bil was awake the first time (the only one I know about, because of the following tidbit). He watched on the screen as the doctor did the procedure. He wondered if he could have a copy of the video.

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  33. Apparently I am just a whore under sedation, my first and to date last colonoscopy was a blur. Once I regained my full scenes at home later, I found I had a pocket full of phone numbers ????

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  34. I'll relate my story at another time, lest it makes you change your mind about having it done.
    ;o)

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  35. Oh heck this was the stuff that................Oh better not tell you that until later. Good luck!

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  36. Fortunately, my sudden move has postponed my first colonoscopy indefinitely.

    I'm so pleased by that, might just move again when the subject arises. =D

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  37. Hope your iPad is keeping you amused and that the Prof is providing drinks for the top end. Heartfelt sympathy - I'm sure the purging is the worst bit. But you'll feel light as a feather afterwards! Be thinking about you tomorrow.

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  38. Gas & Air for the hardnuts? I had a colonoscopy years ago - I'd been kicked in my lower back, and was in considerable pain. (I was caught in a crush on Regent Street, a woman thought I'd shoved her and knocked her bag so started laying into me. Fool that I was, I thought someone would drag her off, but she only ran when the police turned up) Close to passing out, some friends dragged me to the Royal Free. the investigation showed nothing serious, but where I'd been kicked had swollen and crushed part of my lower intestine.

    I chose gas and air over sedation as there were no needles involved. I spent the whole procedure giggling, and set the medics off several times.

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  39. Good luck tomorrow John . I found it better to take the medication in the room next to the bathroom because it isn't as far to run !!.

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  40. Ah. Your movie is being made at last. Not sure it will be on general release though - assuming they get the camera back.

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    1. This comment made me howl with laughter. Oh, Tom!

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  41. I've never had a colonoscopy, but I expect it's a lot less horrific than you imagine. Nonetheless, I think I would also take the light sedation route, just in case.

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  42. Good luck with your procedure. My DH has had about 3 of these procedures. The first time on the way to the hospital we didn't even make it out of our driveway, he had to run back in to the loo. Like everyone has said before me the prep is far worse than the actual procedure. The worst part for me (ha ha I didn't have it done) was having to listen to all the moaning about the clear fluids diet!!! Oh, and the sore bum, diaper rash ointment might be a good idea.

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  43. I chose sedation, but am allergic to the first-choice drug. Told them in advance; no one noticed. They had to scramble to find an alternative, then administered far too much. Sent me home in a non-responsive state and it was 3 days before I came out of it. Never again. I'll take the blood-test option.

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  44. Bottoms up, and hope all goes well!

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  45. I did this last year, Moviprep and all. The light sedation was VERY light, so I re-enacted the Mad Scene from Lucia di Lammermoor until the doctor gave me lots more. What's the point in having a "medical procedure" if you don't get the perks? All of this was carried out in Italian, by the way, 'cos that's where I live.

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  46. Your blog is named ´disasterfilm´ and the stuff you are taking ´moviprep´.
    Who thinks of a punch line?

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  47. I think I can safely say I have had every bodily orifice examined by a Doctor or a Mr as the consultants are called over the years. Been well for years but sadly one due tomorrow so you have my sympathy. It isn't too bad x

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  48. Be extra careful with the bleach, you don't want to arrive with a "target" on your backside.

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  49. OOH, poor John!!
    But I'm confident you'll go through it with flying standards( otherwise, flying bandadges...) . I thought the opposit insertion of camera was horrible, but there you have a clearer view so to speak, and therefor several more options for concern...
    We'll bear you in mind and your homecoming will of course be heroic!! I hope the outcome of it all will be a good one,

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  50. The prep is definitely worse than the procedure! If you have more of the ghastly liquid to drink it sounds strange but a good tip I was given was to drink it through a straw goes down faster and you don't have to taste it too much!

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  51. Good luck for tomorrow John :-)

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  52. The prep is definitely worse than the procedure! If you have more of the ghastly liquid to drink it sounds strange but a good tip I was given was to drink it through a straw goes down faster and you don't have to taste it too much!

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  53. Just think you get a camera up your arse.

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  54. I had one this year. The only good thing about this procedure is the sandwiches and cuppa after. I know that just before I'm knocked out I think about that tube going up my bum ......

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  55. Typical of me...nothing much has happened as yet
    Late for everything!

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  56. I won't tell you how mine went, but I hope I never have to go through it again. Good luck.

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  57. My first one a few years ago with sedation almost threw me off the table! He couldn't complete it. So the next one I was anesthetized. My last one in January I was sedated with more drugs and it went very well! Don't be afraid to ask for more sedation if you need it as the process goes on....I did and they obliged. I was as 'clean as a whistle' he said and wanted me to come back in 5 years. OK by me!
    Good luck John and as many have said, the prep is the worst part.

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  58. I was at the other side of all this foolishness for Jimbo X 2 as the responsible adult "caretaker" of sorts for HRH. Now it's my turn on Friday! At least I know what to expect but that's quite different than actually participating apparently! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!!

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  59. All the best. Perhaps the dehydrating effect of the laxative will ease the swelling in you knee. Or am I getting muddled with diuretics. xo

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  60. Lots of medazolon called for...I did and I wasn't aware at all. Love the medazolon !!!

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  61. Much easier to have a liquid diet for a day or two before the procedure. Then the prep is less difficult. I always thought it was a good excuse to take a nap.

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  62. Sounds like a performance in three acts ... none of them particularly pleasant! Hope its all over soon.

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  63. You chose correctly when you picked sedation. In the US, the nasty stuff is called "Go Lightly." What idiot came up with that name? But colon cancer is no laughing matter. I have to have it done every 5 years. No fun. Good luck.

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  64. As i expected, It would seem that this is a common international event with bloggers my age! And i thought i was unique!

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    1. You ARE unique John, in many other ways, I'm sure. I think the good Lord has some kind of list... and I feel sorry for you all the same, unique or not. Good Outcome!!

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    2. John, maybe the Prof can use all this 'data' for a thesis/study!

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  65. I hope the 'world has fallen out of your bottom' by now John.....bottoms up and think of England...wishing you well.x

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  66. Thinking of you fondly. Jobs a goodun as they say in the shire where l live.

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  67. Oh, yeah, we've all been there. The prep is the worst part, just like everybody says, but I went the sedation route -- I can't really vouch for the non-sedation option!

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  68. See john hope it's not too bad. I'd go for sedation, had gas and air and it's crap.

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  69. See john hope it's not too bad. I'd go for sedation, had gas and air and it's crap.

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