Wednesday, 23 September 2015

Tits or was it Boobs?


I think I said " tits" instead of boobs
OMG
I can't be sure.......but I think I did
" Tits" is something that shouldn't be uttered in genteel company...it's rather common
" Boobs" is much more wholesome

I've just given my talk on blogging to twenty five members of the " Clwyd NHS Retirement Fellowship" and when reading my blog entry about nursing a spinal injury patient with input of a collegue's phenomenal bosom
http://disasterfilm.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/leaps-of-faith.html
I am sure I forgot to substitute tits for boobs....
No wonder one stony faced audience member gave me the dead eye!
I think she was expecting a Jane Asher-esque chat about a city nurse making jam in a small welsh village
Oh Dear.....
I read out several nursing based blog entries from years gone by and discussed blogging in general
And of course I suggested that the blog virgins in the audience give Weaver, Yorkshire Pudding, Rachel, etc etc a try...........I even mentioned to the tougher members around the table that they give Tom Stephenson a go, but suggested that they have a small sherry first...

For a three quarters of an hour talk, they presented me with 25£ which I blew on the way home
What did I treat myself to, I hear you ask?
I went to Sainsbury's and bought The Prof a set of new headphones, a warm throw which was reduced in the sale and a pedestal toilet mat!
How exciting!


84 comments:

  1. Not even ONE scotch egg? Surely you deserved at least one.

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    Replies
    1. I had my weekly scotch egg last night xq

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  2. Around here we often hear Tats instead, or the most common and still absurd to me, the girls. Boobs is actually used more often by children when they did not accomplished whatever they set out to do as in: Sorry I just boobed that.

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    1. Tats... Thought those were tattoos?

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    2. Those are "ink or inks" depending upon the number you have on your body. 1 tattoo ="check my ink". More than one,
      "check my inks". Truly but certainly English is slowly becoming a foreign language to me.

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    3. Here, too, John, the word tats means tattoos, though I've also heard of "ink" for tattoo.

      I was brought up to believe that "tits" is not a polite word, as I suspect you were, and while I've used other words considered far more vulgar, I don't typically say tits. Funny what we pick and choose.

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  3. What, no Scotch egg? You're far nobler of spirit than I ever dreamed.

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  4. I trust you avoided the fanny and the flannel, they might have been a step too far. I assume you warned them about bad language that can appear in comments from some followers. I am not sure who I am talking about but probably me.

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    Replies
    1. A fanny never passed my lips

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    2. I avoid a fanny passing my lips too.

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    3. Dont knock it if you havent tried it x

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    4. BTW John, forgot to say thanks for mentioning my blog to the ladies, I am expecting a new influx of followers! Anyway, I bet the talk was a hoot from start to finish and they all loved you to bits.xx

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  5. Boobs and tits are perfectly acceptable, hooters and cha-chas not so much.

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    1. Cha cha? Thougt that was a panda

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    2. It's 'threepenny bits' in my book.

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  6. Did you make them laugh? In my experience when I get them to laugh, they don't nod off to sleep.

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    Replies
    1. I raised the odd titter

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  7. Just had to look up my Chambers to find out what a "(warm) throw" was. Wiser now.

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  8. And no scotch egg bought with your reward? I'm sure everyone took in your talk and they're mulling over it right now! xx

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  9. WWHHAATT!!!!! NO SCOTCH EGGS FOR YOU??? C'mon didn't we just discuss life pleasurable moments?

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  10. Well done you. Treat yourself to a scotch egg next time. As for tits? well boobs or the girls or titties are all acceptable in this part of the woods........and I read Tom S but just now I'm a little scared to comment over there! I might need a gallon of booze first!!

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  11. God forbid you called them Knockers !!

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    Replies
    1. Good word knockers!

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    2. My mum used to say knockers! Not very genteel my mum.

      Jo in Auckland, NZ

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  12. You did well with your £25.00.

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  13. Am not ALL that flattered by being one of your suggested blogs John - can't help feeling you took my careful language and genteel entries into consideration.

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    Replies
    1. I bigged your blog up patricia!

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  14. It all gets a bit confusing for me now, all the new ways of saying things and worrying about saying the wrong thing. How brave of you to give a talk, I don't think I'd have the bottle (is that okay to say bottle? ) lol
    Briony
    x

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    Replies
    1. You're confused?
      I'm going quietly bananas

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  15. It's a dragon to be politically correct and all that muck. I would have called them breasts. If they didn't want a surprise, they would have looked elsewhere for a speaker - I am sure your infamous in your area by now.
    Good for your heart - no scotch egg. That deserves a pat on the back!

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    Replies
    1. you are not your - jeesh!

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  16. I think tits are less vulgar in the UK. Common in Brit blogs, anyway.

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  17. Who says blogging doesn't pay off in wealth and fame?

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  18. Even me - the newcomer to the party thought...no scotch egg? :) Sounds like your day was well rounded...

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    Replies
    1. I allow myself one a week and I had one last night...i lost 5 lbs this week at fat club

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  19. As long as no one fainted or got up and left, it's all good.

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    Replies
    1. What about the one that fell asleep?

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  20. Surely tits or boobs are both perfectly acceptable?
    However, use of the word 'bosoms' is not acceptable unless the user is at least eighty years old and called something like Agnes or Enid.

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    1. Bosoms is okay if it is a slug-infested Welsh vegetable garden.

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    2. Bosoms is okay if it is a slug-infested Welsh vegetable garden.

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    3. Okay, I'll give you that one!

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    4. On reflection i should have said boobies

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    5. Like the London Boobies ... or no , wait ... that is Bobbies :)

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  21. Boobs or tits? Is there really that much of a difference that someone was offended? Good thing there was no need to mention any parts further south!

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    Replies
    1. Wot.? Australia?

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    2. No, its called the Map of Tasmania down here...

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  22. It's all about tits with me this week. I've had to deal with one or two of them!

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  23. Not all boobs are "wholesome" Johnno! Some dangle like sporrans and flap about in the wind. Thanks for directing retired nurses to my blog as I am in need of a vigorous flannelling from someone who looks like Hattie Jacques.

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    1. I once heard someone describe a woman at work as having 'tits like spaniels ears'. Kept me laughing all day. No room for political correctness here!

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    2. Ive created a monster

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  24. Sorry John... surely tits and boobies are birds. You gave a talk on birdwatching???? :-)

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  25. A small sherry? Half a bottle of neat gin.

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    Replies
    1. Half a bottle first, make sure to save the other half for after.

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    2. Pour me a large one

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  26. Replies
    1. This is getting surreal

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  27. TITS if they're under age 30
    BOOBS over age 30
    HANGERS over age 50
    PRUNE SACKS between age 65 and death

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    Replies
    1. Prune sacks? Prune sacks! I am SO stealing this!

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    2. I just made it up, and it's yours to keep. (*smile*)

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  28. Hangers?
    Thats revolting lol

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  29. I don't care what jon says, I have BIG TITS!

    (even though they should be hangers)

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  30. My Mother in law used to call me Bubbie .. she loved me.

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  31. My husband calls them "norks", Apart from Carol the BBC weather lady, who has "Magnificent boobies", said in a bad Scottish accent.

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  32. What about bosoms? Or boosies as I called them when I was a tot.

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  33. a pedestal toilet mat? you sure know how to take care of your guy!

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    Replies
    1. I'm one crazy bitch

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    2. Yeah and we love you for it xxx

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  34. TaTa's....or....boobs for me. It's all in the family lingo when growing up me thinks.

    I have found pedestal toilet mats require considerable trips to the washing machine if one's partner has questionable "aim" during sleepy midnight visits to the loo. Oye! X

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    Replies
    1. I always sit..... So the blame goes to the Prof xx

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  35. Now everytime you go to the toilet you'll remember your 'boob' :-)

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  36. Funbags, hooters or she's got a good rack

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  37. My son came home from school one day and said that the supply teacher in the next room, who was from a different part of the country, was trying to quieten the class down and told the kids "you lot are getting right on my jugs!". I think there were a few complaints from other members of staff.

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  38. Congrats on your talk John, ignore the dead eye I'm sure you were a fab presenter. Now can I ask what is a toilet mats function? I don't get it. I mean if your worried about cold feet you'd have to wear slippers otherwise your feet would get cold on the way to the mat right? If your wearing slippers the mat is superfluous to needs. Please enlighten me.

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  39. Dear me, are there still people who find the word tits shocking and impolite? Where have they been for the last 20 years? In a secluded hermitage in the Welsh mountains?

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