Bleeding Lidl

Like a lot of people, I have been sort of seduced by the aspirational tv adverts circulated by the Lidl chain of supermarkets. You know the type of advert I mean. Well dressed, city types, sitting in a comfortable gastro pub, all tucking into cheap but ever-so-tasty morsels washed down by a cheeky little number that only cost £5.99
Well yesterday, I decided to see for myself what all the ballyhoo was all about.
But unfortunately the Lidl in Rhyl is NOT the Lidl of the tv adverts.
Rhyl Lidl is situated in probably one of the poorest areas of North Wales and it showed.
I was decked out in a knackered pair of combats and my second best walking dead T shirt and even I felt overdressed as the very poor, mentally ill and disadvantaged of the coast did their shopping.
It was a depressing experience, even though much of the food looked ok!
I was perusing the meat counter when I caught sight of a man next to me giving me a funny look., I didnt feel like challenging him so I carried on looking at the schnitzels until he said loudly " you're bleeding"
I put my hand up to my face and almost from nowhere I was covered in blood. I had a doozy of a nosebleed.
By the time I had fished into my pockets in the futile search for a tissue I looked like Sissy Spacek from " Carrie" so I took my woolly hat off , jammed it on my nose and staggered out of the store.
No one else gave me second look.
Knackered looking middle-aged men in blood soaked Walking Dead T shirts must be two a penny in Rhyl


Now the last time , i think I had a nosebleed I was in my teens, so I pinched my nose and waited for the bloody thing to stop .....it didn't.
An hour later, after driving home one handed, my face looked like two fried eggs in a bucket of blood
And so off I went to A&E , where , after a large and painful " pack" my hemorrhage finally stopped
Several hours later!
It was almost dark when I eventually got home.
There were puddles on the kitchen floor from the dogs and because I was late, an opportunistic fox had snatched my ten year old buff orpington from  behind the hen houses and  I didnt even buy a schnitzel for my tea.

95 comments:

  1. Hope the nosebleed is better. From our cosy little spot on the Wirral I have an Aldi and a Lidl in walking distance. They are very good value and the food is brilliant, but you do have to take the rough with the smooth with regard to the other shoppers. I did get 5 fruit trees for the allotment reduced to £3.99 each from Lidl a couple of weeks ago, so it could be worse!!!! xxxx

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    1. Well i have been duely informed that I actiually visits Aldi
      Never again!

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  2. At first I thought that you, in referring to 'Carrie', were talking about the early school shower scene and I wondered if all these years I'd been mistaken in thinking it had been something else while in reality she'd only been experiencing a nosebleed. But your picture cleared it up - if not the blood (from wherever).

    Last Summer I had a spectacular one (bleeding from the nose, that is) which wouldn't stop, so rushed off to A & E, holding onto my schnozzle. By the time I was seen, 2 hours 40 mins later, it had, of course, ceased, and hasn't recurred since. I hope yours turns out the same way, though I'm disturbing to read about your 'collateral damage' as a result of it.

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    1. Yes..........give a fox an inch.......

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    2. ...and he'll take a foot - and the rest of the body along with it!

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    3. Schnozzles and schnitzels. This is all very confusing

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  3. Poor John. You rarely lead a peaceful life. Interesting yes, but not peaceful.

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  4. I had a nosebleed that started when I was at school. It was late at night and the women's bathroom, the hall of the English dept at the university looked like a slaughter had occurred. I ended up in the emergency room. They finally got it to stop.

    Did you know people bleed to death from nosebleeds? Not often does it happen, but it is enough to frighten me. Attilla the Hun died on his wedding night of a nosebleed. Freud thought noses and nosebleeds were sexual in nature. Don't ask me!

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    1. Sexual? Really?
      I judt blew my nose too hard

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    2. Attilla died of a nosebleed after his new wife socked him in the face with a plank. I'd bet my pocket money on it.

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  5. Good morning John. It was Aldi you visited in Rhyl & yes it is pretty dire. Prestatyn, my home town has a much nicer Aldi with much nicer staff. Our nearest lidl is the far side of colwyn bay, near the zoo turn off. I haven't been but my brother says its good. I love reading your blog and I get regular updates from my daughter, whenever she serves you at MacD's drive through xxxx

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  6. By coincidence I also visited my local Lidl yesterday. Lady Magnon refuses to go into it, but as she is away I grasped the opportunity. I bought two types of sliced ham and some little gem salads. All perfectly good, and quite cheap!

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  7. Not a day to look back on with pleasure! Sorry about your nose bleed and your Buff Orpington. If you are having the gales like we are here in Leicestershire, she would have blown away.
    Hoping today is a much better day. xxx

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  8. When my husband had a horrendous nose bleed I effectively managed to stop the bleeding with a tampon. I told him to rest quietly. Did he listen? No, he decided to lift a heavy sofa and wondered why the haemorrhaging started again. Ended up at A&E (said he was embarrassed to sit in the waiting room with a tampon up his nose!).

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    1. Ive only got a small nose........ A tampon would make me look like apig

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    2. I can't imagine you and the prof have many lying around anyway

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    3. Lol!

      Jo in Auckland, NZ

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  9. Lidl...as my dear old grandmama would have said, you get what you pay for....

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    1. Yes, and if you can't pay for it at Lidl or Aldi, you can always visit the Foodbanks where they are giving out food for free because, unfortunately, in this country in this 21st century,some folks can't afford to buy anything to eat.

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  10. In Lidl the food is good but the experience is unfulfilled. I am so sorry to hear about your nosebleed. When is Chris due back? Try not to overdo it today. x

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    1. I think hes got my cold...... He is due back later today.... And i am sure will be dying!

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  11. All that from a trip to Lidl? There are some people here that have disowned me since they learned that I visit Lidl regularly and live next to Waitrose. That's Bath for you.

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    1. Well.............i did briefly worry when i saw that "Tom Stephenson" had been deleted
      I look forward to your resurrection

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  12. Lidl and Aldi are my garden centres John. Seventy nine Cents for vegetable seeds.

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  13. I went in a Lidl once but I couldn't cope so I went back to Waitrose. Why did you go to A & E? You're a nurse.

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    1. It wouldnt stop! So i went

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    2. Then it stopped, as it would have had you not gone in. People turning up in A&E with nosebleeds? Whatever next? Mind you, since you claimed you were in Lidl but really were in Aldi it was probably toilet tissues stuffed up your hooter in the local pub that fixed your nosebleed. Are you sure you should be allowed out alone?

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    3. Sigh
      Everyone knows better

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  14. We don't have Lidl's here, but we do have Aldi. When they first began opening stores in the area they were total crap, and filthy to boot. The foods on offer were horrid, and the produce? It should have been cast as extras in Walking Dead.

    In the last few years, however, they've improved immensely and have an extensive line of reasonably priced organics on offer.

    Sorry you had that horrendous nosebleed, hope it's just a one-off occurence. Buff Orpingtons are my fave breed of chicken, my Gran had a hen that was the biggest cuddlebug ever! 10 years is a good age for a chicken, but I'm still sorry the fox got her. =(

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    1. We can feel happy for the fox though, can't we?

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    2. Do we have to? Although the thought of a fox with a featherball is mildly amusing.

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  15. Oh John, what a scene you paint ( in blood ! ) I am disappointed at Lidl- been twice to see what all the fuss was about.

    Your description made me giggle so thank you as I've had three nights with lack of sleep.... but so sorry about the orp xx I bet Winnie gave you a big slobbery kiss xx

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  16. Now, THAT's a great advert for Lidl! I was immediately concerned for you, but since you're a healthcare professional and don't appear to be too concerned, I'll calm down... But, IS that something to be concerned about? I don't think I've ever had a nosebleed in my entire life (and I hope I don't live to regret saying that).

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    1. Nothing to worry about..unless my blood pressure was up ( which it wasnt)
      I think i just overblew things

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  17. Anonymous10:12 am

    I get the occasional 'bleed' and no matter how old I am and how used to it I should be by now I still feel panic. I hope you never have to experience that again. The dogs I am sure, forgave you...the hen...not so much.

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  18. That must have put you off going to Lidl, you would probably have been put off without the nose bleed. I hate the place, ugly buildings, ugly produce, they hardly employ any staff and contribute nothing to a community. The term a place has been 'Lidled' generally means it has gone down hill.

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  19. That must have put you off going to Lidl, you would probably have been put off without the nose bleed. I hate the place, ugly buildings, ugly produce, they hardly employ any staff and contribute nothing to a community. The term a place has been 'Lidled' generally means it has gone down hill.

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  20. that was a day best forgotten!

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  21. John, hope your nosebleed is better. I had bother a few years ago every time I went out in the cold. Then they suddenly just stopped.

    Can I ask your advice please? With all the animals you rescue, have you ever had experience of a dog terrified of the vet? I've tried desensitizing her by walking her up to the surgery every week, weighing her, getting staff to fuss over and give her treats. All is well until she spies injections or the vet starts poking and prodding her. Any advice welcome please x

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    1. I think some dogs are just terrified of vets and there's nothing you can do except to be sympathetic.

      Our pup shook from head to foot every time we took her, and she had loved the puppy parties, the treats and the fuss but just taking her to the door brought about total body quiver, the other three are all fine ... even with injections.

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    2. Thanks Sue, I'm thinking that our rescue dog will always have this problem. She had a bad experience at the vet with the previous owner which may be the cause of the problems. The vet has suggested a mild sedative before taking her to the surgery next time because she is very big and strong and is hard to keep still. Our other dog is absolutely fine and happy to go to the vet.

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    3. I agree with sue
      Once an anxiety is fixed its very hard to change it.
      Sometimes a mild tranqualizer can help..the vet may give you one to give her BEFORE she even gets into the car!

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    4. Thanks John. I'm sure she had this anxiety before she came to us. The vet mentioned a DAP? collar too but I've never heard of anyone using one.

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    5. You could also try spraying your car with some Adaptil, it calms dogs down in a very natural way. We have a diffuser in the house that plugs in for when tempers get frayed with each other and a spray to use elsewhere. You simply spray it on the seat your dog will be sat on (or in his cage) fifteen minutes before he will be sat there. He will breathe it in on the way to the vets and hopefully be slightly more at ease.

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    6. Thanks Sue, Would it work on my husband too after a stressful day at work? xx

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  22. Oh My! Do take care of yourself.

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  23. I was reading this post to the end John and seriously my outpouring ... for want of a better word was .....oh for fuck sake is that seriously Johns day.... then I read on and I was like... oh for fuck sake ..... John seriously mate!

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  24. Omg John I am aware of my previous post.... but I was in shock...what can I say....sorry for the f word ...bother!!!

    Jo in Auckland, NZ

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    1. I enjoyed the walking dead later that night so... The day wasnt a complete bust

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  25. Wow that's a day to forget, Hope you're ok and the puddles are all gone x

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  26. I always shop at the Lidl on Chesterfield Road in Sheffield saving hundreds of pounds every year on our groceries bill. The staff are friendly and helpful and most of the customers dress like me - smart but casual. Nobody has ever lamped me on the snout and I have never run out of the shop bleeding like a whale that has been harpooned from a Japanese "scientific research"vessel.

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  27. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  28. What a day you had! I have never had a nosebleed in my life (hastily touches wood) and I am ancient. I hope I never do have one, it looks very unpleasant, not to mention messy. I'm sorry about your hen.

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  29. Sounds like an experience to remember ... perhaps someone is trying to tell you not to shop at Aldi or Lidl!!

    As for your troll, I think a spot of deletion is in order. Keep the b*ggers at bay.

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  30. You poor thing.
    See, I tried Aldi's here in New Jersey. NEVER AGAIN. Perhaps in the UK they are more regulated, but the foods in the one I went to? It is like they are systematically trying to kill the poors. All processed, crappy produce. The people were nice, but offering a a big box of high sodium ramen noodles for like $5.00 is not doing anyone any good.

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  31. I've tried Lidl a couple of times, but the range of food and products is so limited compared to Sainsbury's I remain loyal to my regular supermarket.

    I hope you haven't had any more nosebleeds. I went through a phase as a teenager when I had a nosebleed just about every day. Nobody could ever explain why.

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    1. It's partly that limited range that appeals to me. Less choice. Less confusion. Easier shopping.

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    2. It's partly that limited range that appeals to me. Less choice. Less confusion. Easier shopping.

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    3. Bring back the daily fresh shop locally!

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  32. I knew a fellow, last name Lidl. He had mental problems.

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  33. I've had my snotbox cauterised twice this year...best of luck!
    Jane x

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    1. Oh something to look forward too eh?

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  34. Probably has something to do with the cold you had....? Tiny vein needing cauterized? Take care of yourself.

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  35. Oh man. What a horrible nightmare of a night! May it all be sorted out although of course, you're not going to get that hen back.
    Damn.

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  36. Anonymous1:29 pm

    Wrong correlation, John. For all the Waitrose/Sainsbury shoppers/Guardian readers in your comment box you may as well have had a nose bleed in M&S.

    U

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    1. You can be quite odious cant you ursula ?

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  37. I totally sympathize, John. I had a terrible nosebleed that wouldn't stop for days. It turned out to be roaring high blood pressure, which was finally brought under control but not until several days in hospital -- in Germany! My room mate was a lovely nun from the Philippines. This meant a stream of nuns coming through the room -- all lovely and all English speakers. You wouldn't believe how much wadding got stuffed up my nose (yes you would, you probably have seen it done) anyway, I looked like a different person and freaked out my sons. The nosebleed probably saved me from a stroke. Blessings and all that!! As for Lidl -- and Aldi -- they are ok and there are definitely good deals to be had. Do you often shop in Rhyl?

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    1. I wont be shopping there again!
      When i worked in Rhyl as a teenager ( i was a bank clerk) i remember there being some sort of nunnery in the town as a couple of nuns used to bank with us!

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  38. You obviously need a husband at home to look after you.

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  39. When I was in grade school to the first year of High School I had nose bleeds all the time. Finally I had the the veins in my nose cauterized.
    It helped so much.

    cheers, parsnip

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  40. Yeah, yeah... but apart from all that was it an okay day?

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  41. Oh dear.....y'know it used to be said that if you had migraines you never had nosebleeds and vice versa.....my mister has the nosebleeds and I have the migraines....poor you. Our Aldi is ace and I must admit along with sainsburys I shop there regularly now...Lidl not so much. Take care of yourself..x

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  42. It was brave to go to either Lidl or Aldi. I admire such an adventurer. I've had a few embarrassing nosebleeds but never ever ever that bad. You'll need tissues on your person as a security blanket for a few weeks.

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  43. Ye gods, what an f awful day!
    I saw somewhere that we now have the 'lidl classes', middle class people who have decided that it's smart to buy cheap, unbranded food of dubious provenance. A case of clever marketing if ever there was one!

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  44. Better class of Lidl and Aldi up here! Perhaps it isn't the ultimate shopping experience but if it's saving money you're after, it's a safe bet. Our Lidl even has its own in-store bakery which produces the loveliest sunflower/honey loaf and other nice breads and rolls, also a great range of fresh fruit and veg. Can't fault that, really.

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    1. Our Aldi and Lidl are really good up here in the north of Scotland. My only complaint is that news has obviously spread and the stores are getting too busy and running out of stock. However, if I ask an assistant, they usually pop through the back to the stores and get me what I need. Our Lidl has its own bakery too. And I find the fruit and veg from Aldi stays fresher much longer than from the bigger supermarkets.

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  45. As I read, I kept swinging wildly between snorting and chuckling and frowning ... I am so sorry about your nosebleed and hen and puddles of dog pee, but I love how you write :)

    "Second best Walking Dead t-shirt" ... snort ... and I think your hat has been through more than enough with the Winnie beach-wash and now a profusely bleeding nose ...

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  46. You had one of those days that you should have stayed in bed.

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  47. Hope you are on the mend! You got the nose tampons with strings? Did they tell you to pull them yourself? (EENT nurse here) Our patients get very squeamish when we tell them how to!

    My son had to have packing due to a post op bleed. He came to mid packing as he burnt through the Ketamine. Having said that he is now a legend in my hospital for his "altered state" and hitting on all the young nurses and porters. He was a ripe old 16 at the time.

    Take it easy and stay off work for the next week You deserve it!

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  48. Just make sure you soak those babies well before you pull them out... but, as a nurse, I guess I'm trying to teach Granny to suck eggs ( I quote my Mum ). Here - in the land down under they use inflated saline balloons that get deflated and slide out with absolutely no pain . Move to NZ.

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  49. That's a very sad story. At least you weren't becoming a walker...

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  50. My 5 y.o. son got bouts of unstoppable nose-bleeds, requiring packing and cauterising. Caused, we discovered, by airborne allergies. A waterbed, wooden floor and scrupulous dusting brought a miraculous improvement. As an adult he has become allergic to cats but is much better on the bleeding front. Can't even visit a house with a resident moggy which is a shame as a very close friend has two.

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  51. So sorry about your poor chicken, the piddle can be cleaned up, but your friend is gone to the big free-range in the sky. So sad. I do enjoy your stories, even when they're sad - you have a wonderful gift. Thank you. What does Dr Chris say.... or is he too busy dressing up this week to worry about his beloved's nose bleed?

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  52. Oh my god! What a day! I wonder what caused the nosebleed? Did the doctors have any ideas? I haven't had a nosebleed in my life (knock on wood) but I imagine it's terrifying, especially in Lidl.

    Sorry about the chicken. We just had a fox run through our back garden about half an hour ago. No chickens here, though.

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  53. I am in agreement with you about Aldi and Lidl John. I have tried Aldi several times but it just leaves me cold. When I am in there, I just want to race out again.

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  54. What a crap day! Poor you - hope they get to the bottom of what caused the red nose episode. Agreed about Lidl - I don't get why shoppers put themselves through that? Aldi is a bit (not much better). I go there about every 6 weeks to stock up on their skinless chicken breasts - they are the best around!

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  55. I had a premonition about you yesterday. All of a sudden I thought to myself I hope John is Ok. No one really believes me that I have them sometimes.

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