Tuesday, 27 January 2015

Cecil: The Big Girl's Blouse

Stick with me on this one
Last week a woman from Llanasa asked me if I had a cockerel for sale
she was looking for a "friend" of hers
I told her that I didnt 
Two days later a woman from Gwaenysgor called in wanting to rehome one
I told her that strangely enough that I knew of someone who wanted a cockerel
I rang Llanasa woman who asked me to take in the cockerel until she could see it
That I did
Gwaenysgor woman dropped off cockerel
Llanasa woman came to pick it up
But then decided to photograph cockerel for her "friend" to see
Friend has now decided he didn't want the cockerel
and now the bloody cockerel has been left with me.......
Hello?

So meet Cecil
Who is the biggest fucking big girls blouse this side of the Welsh Borders

Cecil ( centre) 

Only the size of a very small teapot, he has spent his first day
hysterically running around the field screaming at the top of his lungs when any new hen 
looked at him in the wrong way.
I have honestly never seen anything quite like it!
Especially as he has big feathered feet which give him the look of a small clockwork toy on amphetamines

The neighbours thinking that something awful was afoot, started to venture into their front  gardens after  a couple of hours of 
this verbal hysteria , and so I had to march over to he field to take charge of the situation
After ten minutes of screaming, I finally caught a hyperventilating Cecil in the graveyard
and put him into a run with Phyllis Diller and the mild mannered Bodica.
As I type this, he is lying inside their hen house with all of the drama 
of Scarlett O 'Hara before the ball.

An anxiety filled cockerel who is terrified of hens is not a character fit for purpose
I'm such a sucker


72 comments:

  1. Well I'll go to the foot of our stairs. (Never did know what it meant but seemed to fit with the big girls blouse.) Hysterical.

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    Replies
    1. My mother used to say it all the time......I never realized why!

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    2. Another appropriate one might be 'the sights you see when you haven't got your gun'.

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  2. Again I am the first. Where is every body?
    Your hens are so human , or is it you that can see beyond.

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  3. Replies
    1. I'm a sad middle aged guy with a good imagination

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  4. He's pretty though.

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  5. I see the resemblance to "a small teapot".

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  6. Perhaps you ought to show him how a cockerel OUGHT to behave (not literally, of course) and hope that he takes after you - you know, all macho to the roots! And you might play him 'Walk like a Man' while you're at it.

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    Replies
    1. Can I detect a hint of sarcasm Raymond?

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    2. Goodness me, J.G., NO!!! (You know me by now).
      I'm quite aware of how frustrating it is to have a cock that won't behave the way you want it to.

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  7. Cecil might make a nice coq-au-vin - not as a celebrity cockerel chef but as the principal ingredient.

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  8. Maybe cock on a stick, plucked and roasted...........
    I agree, he is pretty for a boy! xxx

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  9. Oh. I will take Cecil. He would fit right in around here.

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  10. Well, Cecil will soon realize that he has found paradise! And he will totally be embraced, right John?! ....once he gets the 'lay of the land'.

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  11. I'd prefer, and have more use for a small teapot!

    Mary -

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  12. Ooh, a dandy!

    Mind you the quivering spinster act might be a thing of the past once he's been there long enough to get territorial!

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    Replies
    1. " quivering spinster" I love that description

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  13. I like a cockerel who isn't afraid to show his feminine side....

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  14. I think your phone number is on speed dial when someone wants to get rid of an animal. I hope poor Cecil finds his courage.

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  15. Better than the one I've got ear marked for Sunday roast as he keeps trying to attack my youngest. A sure fired way to end up in the pot at our place!

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    Replies
    1. Roosters can cause a great mess of small legs kev

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  16. Will he moult? You could make a great feather duster.

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  17. You must have a target on your back that says something about being a kind-hearted person, and give-me-all-your-maladjusted-chickens.

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    Replies
    1. Like I said before...a sucker

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  18. I blame the woman from Llama.

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  19. Oh John, that's just your luck. Still perhaps for some reason he is meant to be with you.

    Jean
    x

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  20. Sounds as if you were stitched up by someone wanting to get rid of Cecil and a friend of hers...he is cute, though (so long as you can't hear him!

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    Replies
    1. Yeah....I think it was a stitch up

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    2. That's what I was thinking, this has all the marks of a sting to me. Classic pincer movement.

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  21. I love that you're a sucker, John. Think of the hours of comedic blog entertainment he'll provide for us, your trusty followers!

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    Replies
    1. Very true indeed..mind you most animals have a personality if u look close enough for it

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  22. I watched them making coq-au-vin (is that right?) on River Cottage Australia on Sunday night. Don't think I fancy killing and plucking and gutting and cooking my own. Could you John?

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    Replies
    1. I have done it. I prefer the butchery rather than the killing itself...one of the villagers taught me .
      As for Cecil , I won't bother eating him, he's the size of a budgie

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  23. How cute! They have such character don't they. To think we eat chickens too. I won't eat mine, they have names, but certainly love a good roast chicken:) he'll settle in in a week. He'll be crowing away and driving you mad.

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    Replies
    1. It's lucky that only a few egg layers double up to be good eaters

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  24. I had job to read this out loud to The Pirate....laughing with tears streaming !! Chickens are such characters..wish the fox hadn't got our landlady's chickens!!

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    Replies
    1. Going gently enjoyed by a pirate!
      That's a first

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  25. Funny story! Yes, you got taken in! And, on another point, should a "mild mannered" hen really be named Bodica? Seems inappropriate somehow.

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    Replies
    1. Debra
      Strangely enough she was a waif too

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  26. Oh dear, another mouth to feed. Definitely sounds like a stitch up.

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  27. I think he's a friggin doll!

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  28. Correct me if I am wrong, but didn't you say a couple of weeks ago that because of the wedding and all the galivanting round the world you were both set to do this year, you were cutting down on the population of the Ukranian village - on the other hand, shrieking notwithstanding, he is rather handsome isn't he?

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    Replies
    1. I hadn't planned for him to stay pat

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  29. He's a Pocket Rooster! Hahaha.

    I'll bet he turns out to be a little macho man in the end!

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  30. Conned again, John!

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  31. It sounds like a set-up to me, too, and it angers me. Stupid people, grow a pair, and just ask about rehoming the cockerel.

    Cecil is pretty, and I do hope he can settle in.

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  32. He is adorable, except for the seaming, running and hissy fit throwing.

    cheers, parsnip

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  33. Tomorrow is another day!

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  34. He's very cute. And shrinking in size every time you describe him! lol

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  35. John, you have more idioms in your vocabulary than I can look up in a day. Best of luck to your pint over Niagara Falls.

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  36. Cecil looks like he will fit in nicely ......
    Rosezeeta

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  37. The pretty ones are always highly strung :)
    Twiggy

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  38. Must have been the day for it. My brother text me yesterday to ask whether I wanted four big cocks. I had to decline. One is more than enough for me. The neighbour complains enough as it is. ;)

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  39. I would very much like a Cecil teapot.

    XO
    WWW

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  40. You've been taken, my friend. The entire world knows how generous you are.

    Love,
    Janie

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  41. Not all of them can be "manly men" John. Although you do seem to get your share of misfits. Cecil, I predict, will become a favorite!

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  42. They're just deciding who will be in charge. I'm thinking it is still up in the air. Every time you introduce a new one, the pecking order has to be re-established.

    I love chickens, in spite of it all.

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  43. "a small clockwork toy on amphetamines" - I've SO got to find a use for that one in conversation!!

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  44. Pretty sure that "You big girl's blouse" came from Nellie Pickersgill in Nearest and Dearest from the late 60's. :-)

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  45. He's gorgeous. I do love a nervous fella ... feathered or human ;-)

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  46. I love him already!

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  47. I can only hear the phrase "big girl's blouse" in the voice of Mr. Bates. Or, as I hear Anna say it "Mr. Bettes."

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