Friday, 19 September 2014

Erotic or Kinky?

Today I am trying to catch the young cockerel who arrived only a few weeks ago
He's got into the habit of roosting in the tree in the corner of the churchyard
( next to the light in the lane)
Subsequently He has been crowing rather too loudly from 4 am onwards
So far the neighbours have been kind....but I am sure he'll wear them down eventually
I am working this evening so I shall leave you with a stolen quote
one of my egg customers repeated to me yesterday
It amused me greatly.
As I handed over the eggs through his car window, he asked rather
dryly
" what's the difference between erotic and kinky?"
His question stumped me just a little as the chap is a grandfather of four who is not generally known for more " colourful " conversation.
" you're asking me?" I replied in my best Jewish voice, not quite knowing what to  say
He motioned me to come closer and dropped his voice
" Erotic........is when you obtain sexual satisfaction from using a feather!"
I nodded, wondering just what was coming next
" kinky.........." He looked around slowly" ......is when you use the whole chicken"



49 comments:

  1. I don't suppose you have the same joke about wool up there do you?

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  2. What is jewish voice?

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    Replies
    1. He says he doesn't know, already.

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    2. It's my ." Why aren't you eating your chicken soup" voice if that helps

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    3. Yes. we the jewish mothers have some strange voices sometimes.

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    4. Is it like a Woody Allen voice?

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    5. Nay, nay, and thrice nay.

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    6. Think Golde from FIDDLER ON THE ROOF

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    7. Think stereotype .

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  3. I thought we were picking names for more of your animals for a minute :-)

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    Replies
    1. That's my NEXT competition

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  4. bwhahahahahaha! why does that chicken pix remind me of mae west on a couch?

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    Replies
    1. Come up and see it sometime

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  5. An oldie but a goodie. Sounds like it was a bit of a surprise to hear from his mouth. Cockerel is such a formal word. Surely it is better to use the abbreviated word that we all know so well.

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  6. You never know what thoughts are harbored inside these graying heads -

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  7. Maybe you should stop selling him eggs!

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  8. That's hilarious John......I'll bet that put a smile on your face for the rest of the day.

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  9. Funny!!! Gotta love your neighbors!

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    Replies
    1. Some of them are mad as badgers

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  10. The word Paxo never entered my head!

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  11. It's funny when we hear lines like this coming from a most unexpected source, eh John?!
    And no 'words' at all about the Scottish vote outcome?

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    Replies
    1. Jumbo...I was surprised
      I thought they would vote yes..honest I did
      The subject has been done to death
      Suffice to say... I am glad

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    2. Awww. I am touched that you are glad. I'm a Scot and personally I'd like to be rid of at least half of them. :)

      Anyway, here we are and here we stay, for now.

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  12. That gentleman sure knows his audience, eh?!

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  13. Ooo you are naughty - but I like it.

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  14. No wonder the cockerel is roosting in the tree! Hiding more like from the erotic/kinky customer!!!

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  15. As long as it's not a Moscovy Duck, you're within the limits of normal.

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  16. Just 'cos there's snow on the roof doesn't mean there isn't a fire in the chimney............or something like that.....sometimes stuff like this is funnier when it comes from an unexpected source.

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    Replies
    1. You have just inspired my next post with this x

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  17. Not your standard Oxford dictionary definitions, that's for sure ... the picture is priceless!

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    Replies
    1. apparently it caused much angst in the US

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  18. He then felt pleased with himself for the rest of the day because you are a good listener and he knew it would not shock you but on the other hand it was risqué enough to give him a little bit of a thrill so on balance all happy. I think it is nice.

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  19. Oh, I hadn't heard that one, LOL! Pretty good!
    (Now if I can just remember it...)

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  20. A very clever image. On first sight it looks like a chicken. On second sight it looks like a headless person. Fascinating ambiguity.

    Which reminds me, where did I put that feather? I'm ready for a bit of slap and tickle....

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  21. I wonder where he obtained that wisdom from...

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    Replies
    1. And for how long he has wanted to share it with you.

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  22. One afternoon last winter, when we were experiencing a rare snowfall, an elderly man approached me (at work) and said,

    "Know how to tell the difference between a snowman and a snowlady?"

    "Ummm....no...."

    "SNOWBALLS!"

    Then he walked off cackling. :)

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  23. dude sounds like he has a better sex life than I ever will....

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    Replies
    1. Hey much.. Chin up................

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    2. Haha 'sex life' - not since Feb 2008*.....and I'm married!!!
      x

      *My choice, for good** reasons btw
      ** found out husband (aka The Fuckwit) was a cheater***
      ***why not divorce? fragile daughter, that's why****
      ****oops oversharing again lol

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  24. (0.o)

    Haha. Oh my. Have a great weekend, John!

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