Sunday, 14 September 2014

Back In The Habit

Old friend Nia ( with son George) on her last visit to Wales

I don't really believe in old phrase " out of sight out of mind" especially when it comes to old friends who live away, but I do have to concede when you have important people who live away with busy lives to contend with, things do have a habit of slipping somewhat.
Straight male friends are especially bad at keeping in touch.....it's a bloke thing!
I miss my close friends from years ago.
Of  course I have new friends here, and I am certainly friendly with a lot more people than ever I was with in Yorkshire, but there is something missing, just a little.
Put simply old friends have history with me, especially as they were my " urban family".
A fairly new concept, coined in the 1990s for single, city living Bridget Jones' types.
The other morning, more by luck than design, I sorted out Skype on the old iPad and suddenly was transported to a Sydney suburb , where  old friend Nia was sipping a Crisp white on a damp Australian evening.
We had a lovely chat  and seeing her made all the difference .
The years just melted away.
It made my day.

Fired up, I have now organised a Yorkshire visit in Oct. An old friend ( the Zara wearing Bel Ami- a man with more swish than a pair of net curtains) will be appearing as a Camp Nazi in a local production of allo allo, ( like you do) and so I shall pop over to see the production, then will hopefully catch up with another friend Mike and then Jane the day after.
I'll get them all to agree to Skype me.to finalise details
There's something so vital in " seeing" a friendly face
I think that they remind you, so much, of what you are missing
Don't you think?




29 comments:

  1. 'A fairy new concept'. Oh John, your spelling is a gift, that's what I think.

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    1. P.S. Please don't correct it!

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    2. I did.......I had to...how to you disable this productive spell thing?

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    3. Damn - now everyone will think I am just picking on you for no reason. I assume you really meant, 'predictive', or are you taking the piss?!

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  2. I agree, Skype and FaceTime are great things. We are lucky to have this technology which makes us feel like we are in the same room with our friends and loved ones.

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  3. But what happens when you turn off your computer and your friends/family are still thousands of miles away? I'm dreading the day, in the not-too-distant future now, when my BFF departs these shores......even more than I'm dreading the results of next Thursday's fookin' Referendum!!!(sorry for bad language on a Sunday but honestly, we're awash with it all up here and if one more activist - from either side - knocks on my door I shall emigrate to Wales!!!).

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    1. Haven't had too many knocking at our door up here in the sticks but will be glad when Thursday's over!

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  4. I communicate more with people on their blogs and friends by email than I do with my neighbours. Sad really.

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  5. Nothing replaces 'old friends'. They know you and have stuck by 'through it all. Have fun with your plans.

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  6. You're so right. Having moved so many times, I've lost touch with too many members of that "urban family." We gay "blokes" can be pretty awful at keeping in touch, as well.

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  7. I stay in touch with people.

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  8. An old friend's husband once asked how we remained friends for forty years. Because we know everything, of course. Now they are moving half way across the country. But, she will pick me up at the airport. All is well.

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  9. Online communications have changed the nature of staying in touch, does Facebook count as social contact?

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  10. I'm lucky in that regard, I live a half-block from my best friend who I've known for 40 years. I've posted about him a couple times, the 'cook down the street'. We've spent so much time together over the years, road trips, he even lived with us for a few years way back.
    Another straight bloke like meself, people who know us say we're like an old married couple, completing each other's sentences.

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  11. When this old lady heard in high school that one day we would be communicating face to face, I didn't quite believe it. Of course that was before we had phones.

    Glad you're reconnecting.

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  12. I am so thankful for technology, and the telephone, too, of course. We live in a good time for keeping in touch.

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  13. I have found facebook brilliant for keeping in touch, and getting back in touch with friends that I had lost contact with. xxx

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  14. I have no long-time friends at all. Friends just tend to come and go. But Skype is a marvellous invention. Jenny and I Skype our friend Kath in Melbourne almost every week. Seeing her as well as speaking to her makes such a difference.

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  15. Skype is an excellent invention.
    For me personally, Facebook became tiresome after awhile because after the initial reconnect with every single person you have ever known, you sit back and think, "I really do not have anything in common with some of these folks."
    I also think Facebook makes people socially lazy about keeping in touch. They post a picture or comment and feel that is enough to maintain a friendship. For those who live vast continents apart, this sort of social media is an excellent tool, but for those a two hour or less drive away, I would much rather make the time to see you face to face or share a personal email or call.

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  16. the enchantment of the internet...the ability to transport us in a split second...enjoy your time with your friends

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  17. By coincidence I also managed to set my Skype up yesterday, after frustrating months and months of being a technophobe, prompted by a Facebook comment from my SIL in Guatemala. It was lovely to finally "see" her after almost a year being apart. We chatted for hours in the end. I am so pleased I spent the time working out why nothing would work instead, as I would usually do, saying F it and throwing in the towel.

    Jo in Auckland, NZ

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  18. I take off and leave everyone behind. I don't look back much.

    Love,
    Janie

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  19. My dearest friends are ones I made 20+ years ago. We still make a point of getting together.

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  20. Family and I have used skype but we now have "Line" iy was a Japanese app but now it has an USA app.
    One of the perks is I can talk and see my Japanese family. Fabulous !
    Or any friend who have the "Line " app.

    We still use Skype for Christmas gift openings.

    cheers, parsnip

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  21. Straight men with wives are the worst - particularly when you're a woman and you've known them longer than said wives have. Can we all say "insecurity"?

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  22. Yorkshire? Is that as in 'North Yorkshire'? If so, there is always a bed here (I would even lay on Scotch eggs).

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  23. Have just read that - it sounds ridiculous. It does not mean I would fill the bed with Scotch eggs and then lay on them!!!

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  24. Dear Friend - so lovely to "see" you too - it's not just the written or spoken word that connects, but the facial expressions and laughter lines that make the meeting complete. Living on the other side of the world as was my choice, I would be lost without skype. A picture really can tell a thousand words. Love you mate, Nee x

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