Saturday, 12 July 2014

My Arse

My first time on a bike for 40 years
A five mile or so jaunt along the Dyserth to Prestatyn Cycleway.
I could just about cope with the balancing bit,
But my arse now feels as though it's been beaten into shape 
by a pair of steel butterpats


49 comments:

  1. Poor arse. I haven't ridden a bike in 30+ years. Favorite Young Man is an avid cyclist and has a fancy bike with a little tiny seat. He wears padded cycling shorts. They make him look as if he's pooped his pants.

    Love,
    Janie

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  2. Just you wait until tomorrow!
    Jane x

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  3. i love my bike! you will suffer for a bit but the fun is worth it

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  4. Good for you! Good for Chris!

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  5. 5 miles! And already in agony. Seems to me like you've been balancing on a hard leather wedge. For the mature frame a wide soft saddle is preferable, maybe even one with springs and don't forget proper cycling pants with a chamois insert.

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  6. awww but it will become fun.
    My bike is a walker with four wheels and a stationary one with a pillow !

    cheers, parsnip

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  7. I swapped out my hard seat for a gel seat-worth every penny. Rides less then 20k are comfy, anything longer than that, I wear padded shorts. Happy cycling!

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  8. exercise is always hard at the start. (pats your poor arse gently)

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  9. I expect you will be a little sore tomorrow. The body doesn't like to cooperate after 50 when you do something new! Bring on the Biofreeze!

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  10. Five miles on your first outing? Wow! Make sure you soak that tushy!

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  11. It won't be long before you have thighs of steel …….. and a bum to match. Tour de France is calling. XXXX

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  12. A banana is what they used, before gel seats and padded undies, shoved in the relevant place - wherever that is?

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  13. Dear Gods no! I must sleep tonight and now I have visions of something resembling 50 Shades of Grey going on in the Welsh Valleys. Thank the Gods for whisky - all will soon be a distant picturesque haze.

    Can I recommend a home made calendula salve - it does work wonders for all sorts of abrasions and bruising - honestly. Good luck with the fitness regime. :-)

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  14. You definitely need one of the wider, padded, seats; especially if you're going to start with 5k rides! Oh, and whatever you do, DON'T use one of those capsaicin cremes on your poor bum.....

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  15. It's a case of what's called"Monkey Butt"you have to build up callouses on your sit bones.Don't buy the theory about bigger is better in saddles, more saddle, more places to rub.Just takes time and a good pair of shorts help.Love your blog.

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    1. Thank you for your comment dust bunny

      ... Love the name by the way x

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  16. Raw Hide rides again. Poor little butt.

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  17. I've got a gel seat and my arse still hurts. Walking is just as good for you, go foe a bimble instead.

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  18. And I thought it was only delicate female parts that felt the effects of cycling. Good to know the other half is suffering also.

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  19. And I thought it was only delicate female parts that felt the effects of cycling. Good to know that everyone is suffering.

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  20. I clicked in trepidation, for fear of pictures..
    P.S. Now you know why I said 'Ouch'.

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  21. Oh dear, couldn't you have just cycled to a nearby pub?

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  22. Ouch indeed. I hope your poor abused sit-upon is better today. But doubt it - the day after perhaps.

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  23. Am off to sleep on the settee (mattress not arrived yet) with the last thought of the day being your sore botty! Even though it surely is not a thing of jest, I cannot help but have a smile at your plight. God bless you, John, for the smiles you give us. Vx

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  24. It's been forever but I remember that, and being told to use my thighs more to take the load. Yeah.

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  25. sniggering gently.

    I would love a bicycle but this scary light industrial town i live in won't let me.
    xx

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  26. 5 miles seems like a lot for a first trip, but I'm no cyclist.

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  27. When I was in really good shape, lo those many years ago, I was primarily a runner and basketball player.
    I had a bike, and routinely rode it 3 miles too and from grad school. I took a bike ride with a friend, 25 miles total. I hurt in places I didn't know existed. It uses a whole different group of muscles than other exercise, like walking.

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  28. Catching up on your blog (I enjoyed the post about the ladies from Ohio!) and I admire your "courage" for getting back on a bike after all these years! Do I see bike tours in your future? ;-)

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  29. Once that arse of yours gets all calloused up, you won't feel a thing John!!
    Good on ya for doing this!

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  30. Those bicycle seats are too small and not padded nearly enough!

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  31. Well, if it's just your arse and not your jewels - you'll do fine.

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  32. You should prepare : I offer you a helpful hint.
    http://wisewebwoman.blogspot.ca/search?q=izal
    Free.

    XO
    WWW

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  33. They make gel seats that fit over the regular seats.

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  34. You may find that a padded bike seat helps, yes. :-)

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  35. yes, but did you have fun??? Did you smile or laugh while you were doing it? I look at all the joggers and riders in their lycra suits and none of them seem to be having a good time.

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  36. I suggest one of those memory foam pillows strapped on !

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  37. Seems to me that Chris has got your measure completely. The weight will fall off you (and not just in the arse area) - you will be up to 15 mile jaunts within a fortnight - mark my words.

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  38. Since learning to drive quite a few years ago I now hate everyone who rides a bike two abreast down country lanes, maybe your sore arse is karma?

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    1. I too absolutely HATE bikers who ride two abreast
      I am far too polite to do the same

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    2. Glad to hear it! Round here they cycle past talking about the stock market or similar at the top of their voices. Ot seems a very middle class pursuit these days. !

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  39. LOL! You are brave! that's a lot when you haven't been on a bike in years. Get a gel seat and grit you teeth -- but boy will it shift the lbs.

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  40. Your Soreness, commiserations. Last time I was on a (hired) bike I was mortified. Don't ask. I don't want to relive the moment I ran into my poor, then little, son because fucking British bikes don't have that back peddle also known as a "BRAKE". How was I to know? Thank you, thank you thank and thank you, Britain. Never again. PTSD has nothing on me. Now the Angel flirts with the idea of a motorbike. Oh, John. There are disadvantages to being a mother. You tend to apple of your eye's every need, lovingly, only to find yourself in crutches living in hope they won't end up as roadkill.

    Jungle greetings,
    U

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  41. I hate to say "I told you so" but see my comment after your "Saddle Bags" post. If it hurts that much you won't want to ride the bike so go to a bike shop and get a new seat. May I suggest the "Fat Arse" brand.

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    1. My buttocks are firming up quite nicely at the moment YP

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  42. Believe it or not I'm envious... I can't ride a bike any more. Waaaah. Lovely blog, I used to live down the road from you!

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    1. Where was that rachfishop?

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  43. Five miles is a long ride for the first outing, congratulations on surviving.

    When I was uncomfortable, my English grandmother would offer to "kiss it and make it better" we can only offer to do that by long distance.

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  44. Thanks for the comments will reply to them all a little later this afternoon x

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