I'm fucked

TAKEN FROM THE DAILY TELEGRAPH 2010


"Brits' sense of humour fails at the age of 52, study finds

'Victor Meldrew Syndrome’, when adults become more grumpy than happy, kicks in at the ripe old age of 52, scientists have found

It is then that both men and women begin to suffer a sharp decline in their sense of humour and get increasingly grumpy, according to scientists at the University of Glamorgan.
Victor Meldrew
Victor Meldrew knows that being curmudgeonly is a comfort
The study also backed the long held belief, epitomised by Meldrew, that older men are grumpier than women – four times grumpier in fact, for those in their sixties.
Researcher Dr Lesley Harbidge of Glamorgan University said: "The Lifetime of Laughter Scale shows that there really is a law of diminishing returns when it comes to laughter.
"We laugh twice as much in our teens as we do in our fifties. And our findings suggest that it's all downhill from 52.”
The study found that while an infant can laugh aloud as many as 300 times every day, life rapidly becomes far less fun."
Dr Harbridge is a twat
I have just opened 16 cards ( thank you bloggers who sent me one btw....the postman had great fun sorting out the vague addresses) ......received two garden vouchers, 2 T shirts, 3 smart shirts, three pairs of pants, a small wooden chicken, and tickets to see 12 Angry Men
And although it is only 08.35 and I have not even finished my first cup of coffee as yet
I HAVE SMILED THREE TIMES ALREADY!
Mind you...one of those were as a direct result of an overly large bowel movement
So read that and weep Harbridge........you smug cow

70 comments:

  1. i'm not planning on ever being 52! But happy birthday nonetheless. xx

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  2. Birthday greetings from the Western Cape in South Africa. Hope your day is a goodie, with lots of smiles, giggles and guffaws...

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  3. what a load of rubbish (you will neaver grow up,) so you will be happy no matter what age you are just bimble on in your own way dogs will keep you young and active
    happy birthday kido

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  4. I'll have to tell Howard he's ahead of his time.

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  5. I was always told if you were grumpy when you were younger then you'd be a grumpy old bastard when you're older. I've got plenty of older friends who aren't grumpy in the slightest. I've also got plenty who are right grumpy bastards, but then they've always been like that!
    Happy birthday! not long till 60 now!

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  6. Happy birthday. Hope the day continues as well as it has started. Nothing like advancing age to make you appreciate a decent bowel movement - I'm sure I was in my 20s before I did. :)

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  7. Happy Birthday, have a lovely day!

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  8. Happy Birthday John! Will you or have you already had a celebratory Scotch egg?
    Well, just in case you are interested.........pop over to my blog and see your pressie x.

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  9. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHN..........xxxxxx

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  10. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHN!!! May your day be full of smiles and laughs! And with a menagerie such as yours, of course it will be! Mwaah. xxx Jo (East Africa)

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  11. In my own experience Harbridge is definitely WRONG, and I only have to look in the mirror to prove it!

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  12. Happy birthday, John! It's a lovely day for it :-)

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  13. There are a lot of clothes in the pressie haul. Is someone trying to tell you something?
    Happy Birthday x

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  14. "an overly large bowel movement"

    Ah... A wonderful birthday present to yourself (judging from your reaction). Many Happy Returns.

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  15. Delurking...

    Happy birthday and may the sun continue to shine :-)

    Pat

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  16. Happy Birthday John. I am so glad about your bowel movement. Have a lovely day. xxx

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  17. Well, I had noticed a tendency to grumpiness and melancholy lately. I thought it might coincide with me following your blog! Come on you are just a youngster compared to some of us. So agree with the what the report says about women. My husband is a living example of this finding. Are you celebrating by wearing your pee trousers? Have a great day, love Jan B.

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  18. I think chris is far grumpier than you, and he's younger!

    have a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious day!

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  19. 'Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday Mr John Gray..................Happy Birthday to you!'

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  20. Happy birthday!

    I'm not getting happier as I get older, but that's circumstances and I focus on being cheerful. I'm getting more tolerant, not less, and I've learned over the years that you must take up every enjoyable moment you can and appreciate it.

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  21. Out of lurkdom to with you Happy Birthday.

    And yes, I'm grumpy. You got a problem with that?

    Shadowmoss from Phoenix

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  22. Anonymous10:22 am

    Happy Birthday John......you will never lose your sense of humour.

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  23. Many Happy Returns.
    I try to 'look on the bright side' where possible.
    I did mean to send you a card but as I'm a decrepit 5 years older than you I forgot... the bright side of that is I saved myself the cost of a stamp!

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  24. Happy Happy Birthday JOHN from way across the Pond in little old Bruce Peninsula xx

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  25. Snug cow? Sounds cosy.

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    1. Oh and Happy Birthday - it is today isn't it?

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  26. Happy Birthday to you (and many many more to come).
    You make my day with your view on life and your typos kill me!!!

    sNug cow indeed.

    If I'd had brain cells this week I would have posted a proper card, but alas I have nowt (as me dad would've said).

    Enjoy your day, pet.
    susan
    xx

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  27. Happy Birthday you old grump!!

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  28. It's just another of those dodgy "scientific" generalisations, isn't it? Personally, I'm 67, I have a wicked sense of humour and I've probably laughed several dozen times already today. I mean, even his name is funny, isn't it? Lesley Harbridge - he sounds like a typical grumpy old man.

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  29. Isn't that what everyone wants for their birthday John (post title).
    Happy Birthday Dear one! I did a post for you and another favorite Johnnie just now. :)

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  30. Ah, now I discover Dr Harbridge is female and not male. Funny though, Lesley Harbridge still sounds like a grumpy old man....

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  31. Happy birthday to yoooouuuu!!!

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  32. "Happy Birthday youngun' " Make sure at some point today you eat some cake. :) Deb

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  33. Happy Birthday, young man.

    I know a lot of old men. The study is correct.

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  34. Happy Birthday John! May you have the best year ever!

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  35. Happy Birthday, John. Now you can go around saying:

    "I don't believe it!"

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  36. Ha! I say. Ha!!! I'm over 52 and laugh and smile a lot more than I did when I was a miserable kid.

    Wishing you a happy, smiling, non-grumpy birthday, young man!

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  37. Wishing you a lovely birthday today John.

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  38. A nice, long, relaxing poo... isn't that what we all want for our birthday? Hope yours was a great one!
    Just think, you'll soon be able to relax; I'll be turning 53 shortly. Now go have a bite of birthday cake and rejoice!

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  39. Happy birthday from Texas, John, and many many more.

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  40. Happy birthday my friend. Have an awesome day. Congrats on the epic bowel movement!

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  41. Hey John. Happy Birthday! Have a fab day with everyone is spoiling you rotten!

    Picture with the green trousers please

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  42. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

    Don't panic you only get grumpy when you hit 52 if you were grumpy before then!!

    I'm 54 and can be a grumpy old cow at times, but when I'm happy I'm very very happy!! Lovely Hubby on the other hand is 55 and a real grumpy old git ;-) Hehehe

    Have a good day!!

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  43. There are days when I enjoy being grumpy, you keep us laughing and that keeps us young.

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  44. Hadn't wanted to be so far down the list but here's my 'Many H.R.s' to you on this auspicious day. May you have at least as many more as you've already have (tee hee!). No, I mean it - but also with the ruddy health that we'd all like to go along with it but rarely, if ever, does.
    Even though I've notched up precisely the same tally as Nick (above) I do pride myself in maintaining a GSOH, something which you obviously need no lessons in.
    Enjoy the rest of the day, with your complete menagerie - in which I include your other half.

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  45. Happy Birthday from Western Massachusetts, home of Dr. Seuss and Timothy Leary. Now that's whimsy for you.

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  46. Happy Birthday to you!
    Hubby was 52 in March - he's still smiling and laughing, but then he's married to me, so what's not to smile about?( Typed with tongue very firmly in cheek) Or maybe it's just hysteria setting in!

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  47. Happy Birthday xx

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  48. Smiling about your bowel movement is definitely a sign of aging.
    Happy Birthday!

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  49. One year left then for me !... Happy Birthday John xx

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  50. Anonymous3:50 pm

    Grumpy is good. Grumpy makes me laugh. My son reckons I am a mixture of Dylan Moran's Bernard in "Black Books" and a grumpy though not yet old woman rolled into one. Compliments don't get more cherished than this.

    Happsy bappsy birthday, John. The next one only 360+ days away. Something to look forward to.

    Delivered to you in my best petticoat, with a smile and a courtesy: "Two eyes full of light, two hands full of flowers, a heart full of mushy stuff, that's all I can give".

    Hug,
    U

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  51. Happy Birthday dear John!
    I'm 10 years your senior, btw.
    xxx

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  52. As someone nearly a couple decades further down the path, I think any grumpiness we have is well-earned.

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  53. I just turned 55 to weeks ago (Don't feel bad I didn't get YOU anything either) and I find that my crumpy mood has lifted, The kids are grown so I no longer care who they shagged when they were 18. In fact I can pretty much one-up all their stories anyway

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  54. Have a very, merry birthday. (I enjoy being grumpy - it's very self-indulgent!)

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  55. don't worry, darlin'. I'm five years older and I laugh quite a bit every day (getting older - you either have to laugh or cry and it's a choice). Love your doggies.

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  56. Nearly missed the last bus. Happy birthday John. Hope you've had a brilliant day.

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  57. And so you are given the birthday gift of sardonic wit this year...

    Have a wonderful day with Chris, and it sounds like it started out pretty good...

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  58. You're doing your part to keep us all un-grumpy! Happy year :)

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  59. Hell, I don't think I received 16 birthday cards in my entire life. Of course, I stopped celebrating B Days when I was 35. Eventually I had no clue how old I was, and so far I've managed to keep it that way.

    Happy birthday, John. Have a fantastic day!

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  60. Hope you have had a good Birthday day…and that you got my card? With the address to confuse the postman! I am 68 and I still laugh..mainly about the dog's antics! 3 pairs of pants? Is that American " pants" or UK undies? I really need to know.

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  61. Hope your birthday is a very happy one.
    Hasn't that study made all the difference to your life? So glad the researches managed to get the grant money to study such an essential topic. (Obviously an under 50 wouldn't have this point of view - they would just chuckle.)

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  62. A very Happy Birthday to you!

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  63. Happy Birthday, have a great day

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  64. Happy Birthday John!!!

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  65. Have a great Birthday DAY!!!!!! I have noticed the older I get the less tolerant I am of fools . lol Or so the philoptoxos ladies tell me in church.

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  66. Thank you all for your comments

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  67. Happy Birthday John. I'm definitely more grumpy than I was 10 years ago.

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  68. Birthday? Bah humbug.....

    ...hop you had a lovely day...

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