Friday, 13 December 2013

Am I Late?


I have always been a late starter

I was last in my class to know what a " blow job" was
I saw my first " x" film* when I was 20
And I had my first spliff when I was 34

I was 11 before I could ride  a bike without stabilizers
I was 18 when I lost my virginity ( yes to a woman)!
And I was 25 when I kissed my first man!

I saw my first ballet at 29
I started my first university course aged 41
And killed my first chicken aged 47

I went to London for the  first time when I was 19
I had my first pub pint when I was 18
And I was 40 before I owned my first dog

I bought my first antique at an auction at the  age of 45
Stopped wearing short pants at 12
And mooned at a group of American tourists when  I was 38

And I was 40 before I fell in love properly for the very first time

What were you a late  starter with?

*x films in the seventies were today's R ( restricted) movies btw

66 comments:

  1. Driving holiday. I've wanted to have one for years and this year we did.

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    Replies
    1. I have yet to do that one

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  2. lost my virginity (to a man) at age 23. first cat at age 38.

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  3. I lost my virginity to a cat aged 38 (me, not the cat).

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  4. oh god..i started all of that way too early!

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  5. Blow job..discussed in the VI form. First X film...18.No drugs.Never had stabilizers.Virginity 18.Kissed my first man 17.First Ballet 18.First university 23.Never killed a chicken but euthanised animals at 40.Went to London at 19.First pint at 20. Never owned a dog.First antique at auction in my late 30s.Still wear short pants.never mooned at American tourists.Fell in love at 18.
    Jane x



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  6. I'm 52 and I still haven't had my first pint--But my first 'boy kiss' was at 16....

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  7. I was a late starter with getting divorced. When The Hurricane was born more than 27 years ago, I told X after a couple of months that I wanted a divorce. He talked me out of it and we were married for 33 years and 11 months. Divorce proceedings should have started much sooner because I am so much happier without him. I was a late starter at truly falling in love, because I met Willy Dunne Wooters so recently. I believe it is true love. It had better be because I'm not looking for another man now. I was also late in finding out what a camel toe is.

    Love,
    Janie

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    Replies
    1. Yep me too...didn't realise my marriage was fake until 26yrs in. [Still here, biding my time].
      Early with the virginity tho, that was 'taken' from me at 14 and didn't realise it was indeed 'taken' (as opposed to given) until recently.
      Also, didn't realise my in-law family disliked me until 15yrs in.
      Bit of a mug, me.
      sigh
      x

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    2. Love the camel foot comment

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    3. carol vorderman was awful on countdown for the camel toe. My friend wrote to them to tell them! lol

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  8. Went paddle boarding on Tampa Bay last yea (52)....I'm overweight and not athletic, so it was a big deal. Married my high school sweetheart who I met at 17. Never had a good hair day till I went through menopause and it went all wild and bed head like....now I love it.

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    Replies
    1. I had to google paddle board!
      Way to go

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  9. I was the last one of all my friends to start shaving but lost my virginity to a guy at age 14 and to a woman at 19.

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  10. I like to think that I did most things at roughly the right time. Now you've made me feel guilty; there MUST have been something!

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    1. You're too normal Cro. Spend time on Tom Stevenson land.

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    2. Ah, I've just thought of something; I didn't discover the delights of Cumin till I was about 25........ 25 wasted years.

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    3. Think!
      You'll find something

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  11. First kiss (peck) at 12. Second kiss at 16. THat's all you're going to get from me here, but I feel a post coming on about virginity.

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    Replies
    1. Come on
      Spill the beans

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  12. Your so funny.
    OK, why did you moon some American tourists ? I know people don't like us but why oh why did you moon some tourist who just came to see the Palace, shop at Harrods and do all sorts of tourist things ?
    I been to the UK many times but I think I would remember being mooned.
    I am so old maybe I forgot ? hahahahahahahahaha

    cheers, parsnip

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    Replies
    1. I was in York after too many white wines......
      It' seemed a good idea at the time

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    2. Well then I understand !
      In San Juan Capistrano, California there is one day a year when lots of people line the track moon the train as it zooms by. I think they call it Moon over Capastrano !
      I can't remember why or how this started but what a hoot.

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  13. Why have I now got a huge desire to moon at American tourists?

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    Replies
    1. Go out and find a couple.......they are the ones in checked pants

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  14. I'm a late starter on just about everything - apart from being on time ! I'm a stickler for being on time & hate hate hate people being late !!!

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    Replies
    1. Absolutely..... I HATE being late for anything too

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  15. First 'x' film at 17
    Never smoked or done drugs (although not dead yet!)
    Bike without stabilisers at about 9
    Also lost my virginity at 18, and also to a woman!
    Never kissed a man, except on the cheek occasionally.
    Kissed my first woman at 17
    First ballet at 38
    Never been to university.
    Never killed a chicken.
    First trip to London at 10
    First pub pint at 16
    Nevr owned a dog......yet!
    First antique at auction at 37
    Often wear shorts for work in the summer, knee length of course.
    Never mooned at American tourists, although now you have planted that idea!
    Fell in love for the first time at 33

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  16. And when was your LAST spliff? (If you're in danger of self-incrimination you're not obliged to answer.)

    Like Gary above I too have never been a smoker or ever tried any 'recreational' drugs - and I am also not yet deceased (though some days it don't feel like it!)

    Never been in love (apart from my mum and my pussies - both of which are/were NON-sexual, I hasten to add).

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    1. Not since I was 34..... And I must admit I never smoked it ( but ate it in a quiche)

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    2. Now you force a confession out of me. Once I went to a party in Germany (male only, if you get my meaning, which you will) where one of the main eatings available was baked cookies, in which I participated along with everyone else. Later I discovered, though only by over-hearing, that they'd actually contained marijuana ('hash cookies'). If I hadn't known I would never have guessed - they were rated generally as a failure. No one felt any effect at all. Maybe just as well. So, I'm truthfully not quite the druggie virgin I'd like to pretend to be, though it's a far cry from earnest, intentional indulgence.

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  17. It is never too late John! I am 50 and not yet learned to ride a bike. Hopefully that is what I plan to do next year!

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  18. i'm still a virgin at 43...

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  19. Life. Just started properly about half a year ago. 'The best time to plant a tree is 30 years ago. The second best time is now.'

    Els

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  20. Didn't lose my virginity till I was 22. Went to Australia for the first time aged 58. Gave my first blood donation aged 38. Bought my first house aged 53.

    I was a very early developer when it came to being an awkward sod, though....

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  21. Motherhood at 34. Seems late in a small town.

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  22. The young lady I babysat for cured me of virginity when I was fifteen (she must have been in her early twenties). I went home eager to brag to my fourteen year old brother who also baby sat for her, 'Yeah! She's great, isn't she!' he replied. I was crushed! Sadly I then went off to boarding school and never got laid again until after I had joined the Army.

    I only smoked one spliff in my life, here in Angola aged 34, never again.

    First opera aged about thirteen (Puccini's Madam Butterfly), The interval was good, the rest rubbish. My mother cried all the way through, my Father slept.

    The rest of my life has been boring.

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  23. Virginity at 21 but more importantly, I didn't eat curry until I was 22. I've never looked back.

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    Replies
    1. OMG you missed out on all those lovely curries. I could eat curry for breakfast lunch and dinner

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  24. I am definately a late developer, I have never mooned at a group of tourists American or others wise - at 5? I have some catching up to do.

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  25. I think I started everything way too early but I'm still standing. My surprise is that you didn't have a dog until you were 40! All that wasted time :)

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  26. This is hilarious... and fascinating. I STILL haven't killed my first chicken. (And it's not going on my list...)

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  27. Saw my first “X” film at 15
    Never have smoked or done recreational drugs.
    Sixth birthday got my first bike, no stabilizers.
    Lost my virginity at 18 to a woman and at 21 she became my wife. 40 year ago.
    Saw my first ballet at 16
    First University course at 19
    Killed my first chicken at 25
    First trip to London at 14
    Never been without a dog
    Bought my first antique at an auction at 25
    Stopped wearing short pants when I stopped wearing nappies.
    Mooned my first American tourists after a soccer match riot in London, age 16.
    Fell deep in love at 18 and am still there at 61

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    1. Doc!
      I love ya
      Another American tourist mooned
      Love it

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  28. I was a late starter - it's taken until my mid forties to realise that it's ok being who I am and not worrying what other folk think of me. It's so liberating not to care any more!!

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  29. In the language of Precious Ramotswe, none of you are "late." Yet.

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    1. Don't you just love mma ramotswe

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  30. I started playing ice hockey at 40. It was also when i started ice skating on a regular basis. I'm not a natural athlete by any stretch, still not a good skater or very good hockey player, yet love to play.

    Good news for me is that i continue to improve, even though it's by the smallest steps imaginable. I'd like to think when i get to Auntie Glad's age, i'll be a good hockey player.

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  31. I did many foolish things when I was younger. As far as my brain is concerned my life started again from zero when I met OH. anything before that didn't happen.

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  32. First joint (spliff?)..18 I grew up in the 60's!!
    Bike without stabilizers...7.
    Lost virginity....18 ( to a woman).
    Kissed first man.....23.
    First ballet.....30.
    First university course....18.
    Never killed a chicken.
    Never went to London but to Toronto by myself at 15.
    First tavern (pub)......18.
    Owned first dog....11.
    First antique at an auction.....38.
    Still wear short pants.
    Never mooned anybody let alone American tourists!
    First fell in love.....25 to my husband.
    Realizing I was gay.....23. duh.....

    There John. Now I feel totally 'naked'!

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  33. I went to see a movie by myself when I was 34. Pretty much everything else I did way too early.

    plufrompdx

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  34. Age 41 will be the first time I ever live by myself...no parents, roommates, significant other, or child under the same roof. Just me and 2 cats.
    Seriously though what the hell do us Americans do in England that we get mooned?

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  35. I think I was early at everything!!

    My only late thing, falling in love, real love, at 44, and that was after a marriage of 26 years and a divorce.

    I've yet to moon at an American tourist though ... although there is still time ......(especially if a bus load go past this house and the upstairs toilet net curtain is down .... hehehehe).

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  36. I think I was late with everything as well. Still at 30 hopefully that means theres still some things to come!

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  37. Everything I have done seems to be on schedule, no late firsts.

    I killed my first chicken when I was 10. We lived on a farm; I didn't actually kill it. My father killed it, I caught it and then processed it. Yep. First and last time.

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