Thursday, 25 April 2013

Be Careful What You Wish For....


A Previous " object of desire"
My gargoyle birthday gift from Chris a few years ago
I had wanted one for years
Bugger knows why
Working on Intensive Care gives a person a chance to thank goodness for the good things of life.
Having a healthy and happy family and friend group , of course is the most important thing to be thankful for in this world.....but once you put that aside ( and all nurses have to put this aside in order not to go gaga in the workplace) " what I want" is an interesting debate to have in the wee small hours of a night shift, when a gaggle of over tired night nurses get together over a hastily grabbed cup of instant.
Having taken a healthy family as a given, most people said they wanted a bigger house, a bigger garden, the opportunity not to work, more money..... Nothing too original there......
But after the dross......more interesting things started to appear.
A pair of Manolo Blahniks.....an apartment overlooking the Bay Of Naples.........a personal shopping experience........a professional cookery course.......a magnificent new cleavage......a J lo arse

And so.........What did I eventually ask for, I hear you ask?
Well the answer is an easy one

A Cow full of milk........of course

51 comments:

  1. As you are a nurse John I am sure you know that a cow full of milk will have been 'friends' with a bull and will then either come accompanied by a calf (who will drink all said milk) or will have had her calf taken off her at birth (something that you with your -dare I say - daft love of all four-footed things would abhor). Might I suggest a pair of goats instead? But then something in my mind suggests that you have been there and done that.

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    1. Oh you have just burst my simpletons bubble

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  2. Like the man who wished for a never ending pint of Guinness and loved it so much he wished for another one!

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  3. Where would you place the tap?

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  4. Not a scotch egg factory then?

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    1. I would eat the profits

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  5. With a good milk cow, you could supply the whole village with this wonderful dairy product...then make butter and have all the other byproducts cows do provide including excellent organic matter for the garden.

    Having had milk cows you know they always must be milked the same time every day, twice a day. I would be careful what I wished for.

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  6. now what could be so bad about a cow full of milk? haha!!!

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  7. Then you will need a milk maid...

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  8. Go for the mini sized version! But, as was noted, then you need access to a mini sized bull annually....Same with the goats too of course. Ah....animal husbandry!
    Did you figure out a pressie for Chris? Does he want a milk cow too?

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    1. Chris ' nearest love of cows comes in the shape of his designer leather shoes

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  9. Re, the title of your post:

    As a boy I wished for an exciting life.

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    1. You sure got one Thomas...you sure got one

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  10. Funny the stuff you talk about at work. We were between pt's one day and my surgeon asked the group "If you could have any super-power what would you want?" Everybody wanted to fly like Superman. Me? I wanted to be invisible.

    I used to milk cows when I was a sweet young thing. A farm in Ohio with an Amish girl to help. Man, did she have a mouth on her! Cursing those stupid cows! I never heard anything like it as I was gently reared @;>

    BTW, after a few cases of mastitis, I lost my taste for milk.

    Ice Cream on the other hand? YUM.

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    1. Tami, I wonder if we were raised nearby...in Ohio, near an Amish population. I tell you, everyone thinks of the Amish as a gentle people, but I once saw an Amish man cruelly training a cart pony, and that cured me of all googly-eyed romanticism in that quarter. (I should add, the few Amish we knew a bit better were no more cruel than anyone else.)

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    2. Another Amish bubble burst....I thought they all acted and looked like Kelly mcgillis

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  11. Oh. I'm gutted. I hoped your wish was for the magnificent new cleavage.....

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    1. Wands, I thought he was going to say J Lo 's arsenal. After the bleach episodes.....

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    2. Darn auto correct - arse

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    3. With my buttock pained sciatica , I would happily settle for jlo's arse my dear!

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  12. You realize that you may now wake up one morning to find someone has tied a cow to the gate, instead of leaving you a box of chickens right?

    Be careful what you wish for indeed. ;)

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    1. I could cope with that sort of gift......Mind you..I have never milked a cow.....how hard could grasping a teat could be?

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    2. You'd be surprised. LOL!
      Lets just say I'm glad I had dairy goats instead.

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  13. How about a mini Highland? I have wanted one for ages...still trying to convince the husband. Or a mini horse? I have 2 of those and they are adorable. The mini Hiland would be wonderful and you could walk him with the dogs!

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    1. Mini cows? I could milk it in the kitchen

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  14. That is something to wish for... Yah, I'd be careful with that one.

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  15. How friendly are the sheep girls getting? Maybe they'd like a little udder massage in the springtime. Fromage de brebis has a certain cachet.

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    1. I have only. Lunched them once Alison x

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  16. When I was born I went and stood in the queue with the sign that said " Blonde size 8, pert busoms, kept woman" but when I got to the front I got pushed over to a different queue that said " Just normal- look like your mother and grandmother" and someone stamped WORKER on the back of my neck.
    If I could have a wish I`d like to queue again please!!

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    1. NIcely written Shirley......
      I stayed in the fat old fart queue

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  17. I'm still in shock over the bloody ugly gargoyle. What WERE you thinking?
    Jane x

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    1. I think he's delightful

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  18. It is the simple things, John. Right now I would like a banana.

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    1. Well I hope you enjoyed it! X

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  19. I love gargoyles! Does that one live in your house? I usually see bigger ones in gardens/yards around here. I love the idea of a wee little gargoyle standing watch by a window!

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  20. You need a wish editor, my friend. Wish for a close neighbor to keep a cow full of milk, then you can go help when you feel like it and not have to add that to your yard duties twice a day, and your feed bill, and your fence fixing chores.

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  21. What a practical wish, and quite obtainable.

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  22. The cow would need a chocolate dispenser next to the udder so as to flavour the milk....not keen otherwise. No smutty remarks about chocolate dispensers please.

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  23. Love the gargoyle....I have always been fascinated by them on buildings. I like what Shirley said, and as for other wishes, if we put aside the family and health wishes then I am struggling to think of any......perhaps a lack of fear and a contented mind? or a beautiful big fuck off diamond solitaire ring!!

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  24. I thought you wanted an American barn. Keep the big dreams.

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  25. Hey never underestimate the importance of a cow full of milk :)

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  26. That gargoyle looks like a solidified mear-cat. They might catch on and be all the rage. Wishing you a cow full of milk and a pain free bum xxx

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  27. i'd give anything for a goose that lays golden eggs. and i'd guard it with my life.

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  28. I am looking at the objects on the table next to the gargoyle - an NYC snowglobe, daffodils, and a 1950s dial telephone! WOW!

    what I would wish for? peace on earth, equality for all, and an end to hunger and poverty.

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  29. What? You mean you want a pregnant Anne Widdecombe? I don't think that that is humanly possible!

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  30. Everybody must love everybody at your workplace, you know, except for the stressful and confusing times.

    On a personal level, I am not really sure what I want. Or, you can say that what I think I want right now will be different from what I would have said 5 mins before or after. Sometimes I think I am still trying to define life as it is and as I want it to be.

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  31. I'm just glad I wake up each morning!!

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  32. Haha. Great answer, John. I wouldn't mind a cow full of myself.
    Have a wonderful weekend!

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