Tuesday, 11 December 2012

I must Be Orally Fixated

Note to self:
Don't feed the dogs at the same time as making a meat pie!
It's been a busy old morning and I have been rushing around like a blue arsed fly.
Shopworn but still going Theresa the turkey
Yesterday, when I was out at the beach with the dogs, one of the ewes got stuck in the turkey enclosure fencing. Luckily next door neighbour JF saved her, but the side effect of all this little drama was that Bingley, the turkey stag, escaped and attacked the poor defenceless one eyed Theresa again.
She survived the assault and survived the night but this morning looked a sorry state indeed.
I have spend somewhat of a difficult hour cleaning her up at the kitchen sink, before spending an equally difficult time cleaning great globs of turkey shit up from the worktop and kitchen floor... !
Such is life on a miniature farm.
Anyhow back to the meat pie.
After I had sterilised the work tops, I got stuck in with making the aforementioned meat pie,
It was a bit of a rush job, when there is only seven hours of daylight left to you!
Beef, gravy, onions, mushrooms.... the filling  looked pretty rustic and bloody mouthwatering I can tell you, but I was good, I didnt take a huge mouthful of meat covered spoon until after I fed the dogs their dinners.
Yes......... 
you may be there a little before me
I picked up the wrong spoon.
and a substantial gobful of butcher's natural nutrition lamb, rice and pea dog food was not quite what I was expecting.
Could have been worse 
Now did I actually bleach those worktops, or did I just think about it?

42 comments:

  1. There's definitely a Channel 4 comedy series to be made from your little adventures!

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  2. Oh I hope you did.
    Well after a good spoonful of dog meal you should have a healthy scalp and shiny coat. lol.

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  3. Oh no. Double-yuck! I can't take the smell of dog food or cat food - I'm a big wimp...

    Your meat pie sounds de-lish. Do you cook every day, John? I like to cook, but I'm bad about getting 'er done every day. I haven't made a meat pie for ages...

    Glad the ewe was saved - poor Theresa. I hope she will be okay.

    Nitty Gritty Momma





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  4. Hmm! Lamb. Rice. Peas. Bet it tastes great with fresh coriander.

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  5. Eugh!!! So glad I'm vegetarian so no dog food mix up for me. Your daily tales do keep me smiling

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  6. I've always wondered what it tastes like but never dared.....could you give any more gastronomic details? Would Michel Roux have anything positive to say? "Meaty....just as it should be".

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  7. I'm guessing the fumes from the bleach got to your brain and that's why you picked up the wrong spoon to have a taste. Yes, i'm quite sure that's what occurred.

    I thought for a minute you were going to say you fed the dogs the meat pie filling....

    Sorry about Theresa, hope she rallies.

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  8. Chris will probably just get you a bone and some dog biscuits for Christmas. I have heard that people will often, rather uncannily, resemble their dogs but had imagined that this was to do with appearance rather than preferred diet. Just don't cock your leg up round at Gladys's gaffe!

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  9. O M G. Must say that our dog food really smells quite good but I always think of the horrible bits that end up in it. Still, it will be quite nutritious! I hope Theresa survives. We had a little white hen, quite old, who was attacked by our two geese - she looked at death's door but rallied after a bit of T L C - trouble is that this cold weather won;t help.

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  10. This all turned out to be a day of confusion, everything muddled and a bit of dogs dinner of a day in fact. Well as long as you two and the dogs enjoyed their meals does it really matter?!?

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  11. Meat pie filling for the dogs... dog's dinner in the pastry. New recipe for Chris to try. Oh er.
    Men don't multitask, remember?

    Do hope Theresa is OK.

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    1. I remember seeing the boss of a dog food company eating his own product, to prove how good it was. However, I always suspected that it was actually a tin of something considerably better, with a dog food label attached.

      It'd make a good party trick though.

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  12. What is wrong with that nasty old Boris of yours? I get upset when the biggest male in "my" flock picks on the little females but he never injures them, for crying out loud!

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    1. boris died earlier in the year sparrow! this is bingley his junior..... I have no idea just why he has turned on theresa.... they have been living together quite nicely for a year or two

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  13. HA! Life is never boring in your little corner of the world, is it? Your tale about the dog food reminds me of a scene from a book I read years ago. The husband/father in the story is a real SOB, and while he's bellowing (again) about getting his dinner on the table, his wife dumps a can of dog food into a frying pan, adds some chopped onions, and cooks it up for him. He eats it, too. And enjoys it.

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    1. Susan, I think that was The Prince of Tides film starring Barbra Streisand and Nick Nolte (1991-ish). SOB was Nick Nolte's character's father.

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  14. The dog food's probably better than the garbage that's served in most fast-food restaurants or packaged up in microwaveable dinners. I often think my dog eats better than I do--at least it's nutritionally balanced.

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  15. I don't know if it's an urban myth, but I always thought that animal food/welfare standards were better than those for humans. But I could be wrong.

    Certainly, when I am stood on a very packed train, I do think that if we (the passengers) were animals, it simply would not be allowed.

    Nx

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    1. nige and cro
      it tasted rather bitter and fatty

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  16. Note to self: use clearly differentiated spoons for dog and people food. Then hopefully those undesirable taste sensations will not recur.

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  17. Did you sanitize your work space? That was the part that I fixated upon. Those places see some mighty nasty stuff.

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  18. Blech. Tee hee. My lady can see how that happened as she often is making the dog's dinners when she is making her own. I would have loved to see your expression when you realized that this was a bland concoction instead of your lovely meat pie. I'm sorry Bingley is so rough on Theresa. Naughty bird. My lady and I miss Boris. xoxoxo

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  19. I want to know, did you swallow or spit it out?

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    1. spat it into a bin bag!!! lol

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  20. Oh, dear Lord! Poor John - mixing up his dinner with the dogs' food, and probably not for the first time! I keep life simple - just give my cat dry food. No risk there, unless they start making a chocolate cat food. I know that's bad for dogs, but maybe cats are different?

    Nancy in Iowa

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  21. Too funny! As I've gotten to that 'women of a certain age' stage, I've realized that multi-tasking is no longer an efficiency and often leads to picking up the wrong spoon (or worse).

    Hope your Theresa is feeling better.

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  22. Now you know exactly what you're feeding them.

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  23. Oh lord I feel stomach cramps coming on.

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  24. "Oh God!" hahaha!

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  25. Wasn't sure whether to gag or guffaw!

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    1. guffaw
      it makes me feel better

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  26. I think I threw up a little in my mouth. And having had a camera up my nose and down to my stomach this AM I had already done that once today. Yuck! You deserve a treat! Chocolate perhaps?
    Regards, Ruth in california

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  27. What an absolute hoot. Maybe you need an exclusive doggie spoon. I hope Theresa recovers, poor darling.

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  28. it could only happen in your house!!

    Gill

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  29. Ah, John. Haha. I can not count the number of times I wondered if I did something or did I just thought I did.

    Not eaten any dog food yet, but you are right if you think I thought it went the other way...

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  30. I heard recently that Martha Stewart got salmonella poisoning during our Thanksgiving holiday--I wonder if she did the same thing you did? ;-)

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  31. A perfectly understandable mistake. Some things I have cooked over the years might have been mistaken for dog food.

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  32. Ack. Urk. Happens to the best of us.

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  33. Hilarious! But poor Theresa.

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  34. We use differet knives ( old ones ) to dish up the cat & dog food. Joe uses any knife to hand when feeding them. Jess & I annoyed with him call out " Use a cat knife Joe " & he replies " The cats use knives ? "

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  35. Oh heavens, sounds just like our household. The Boss, aka Bonnie the cat, thinks that if we are in the kitchen it must be food time and will sit there demanding she's fed first! It's usually geese and not turkeys that have a reputation for violence ... I speak from experience and have still got the mental scars. Elizabeth

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