The Clothes Maketh The Man



I have never had much of an idea when it comes to clothes.
My "style" ( and I am using the term style VERY loosely here) comprises of a mixture between man at Marks & Spencer's, teenage "I am wearing the bonfire pile of rags, I threw on the floor last night" grunge and a faded 1980 preppy college look
It is all a bit of an uncomfortable mix.
I must be a huge disappointment.


Chris is precise, fastidious and stylish in how he dresses.
My "Dried Chicken shit on the kneecap" look has him rolling his eyes with an exasperation which often borders on the desperate, and on those few rare occasions I have actually worn a suit ( the last time, I think was when he collected his doctorate from York Uni) his excitement was almost palpable.


When I get down to my target weight of 13 and a half stone ( after shedding my  35 lbs of rancid fat) I have promised myself a few new items of clothing.
They may not be age specific
They may not be expensive
and they certainly won't be cutting edge
But at least..they won't have elasticated waists
and they will be clean!

*painting is "Mutton Dressed as Lamb" by G Bunt

28 comments:

  1. Start with a new pair of socks and work your way up.

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  2. I LOVE that painting (and so does H.I. - the professional) and I am going to look up Gary Bunt for more.

    I have yet another friend who is a solicitor, and he is just impossibly immaculate in both dress and grooming. I have stood right up close to him and inspected the details of his toiletry from a distance of about 15 inches, and never found one hair out of place, one crease in his suit, one patch of bad shaving, one tooth out of alignment, etc. etc. In short, I have never seen such a perfect person outside of Madam Tussaud.

    He is both gay and Welsh - I wonder if that has any bearing?

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  3. I'm more a mix of Man at C&A, Millets and Kevin Klein.

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  4. Great picture.

    I wear 'Ratting Clothes'. Fine by me; not so fine by Lady M.

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  5. Anonymous12:03 pm

    Just don't go too far too fast John...slow and easy....

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  6. I think a rainbow-coloured kaftan would suit you. However, perhaps you should visit a fashion stylist in Rhyl for some expert advice. Try "Cruze Clothing" on Sussex Street. They'll be sure to sort you out in the changing rooms.

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  7. I just think the basic rule for men over 40 (may be making an assumption there) is no jeans and no leather jackets. Ever. Not even if you're a member of The Village People.

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  8. I'd say get a whole new wardrobe! And throw out the 'old stuff' as you don't ever want to fit into them again. Well, don't actually mean throw them out ~ you mush have a charitable organization similar to our "Salvation Army" or "Goodwill" where you can donate them. At least the ones that aren't too stained with chicken shit...

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  9. I was thinking you should develop a signature style. Then I realized you probably wear scrubs when you're not wearing barnyard appropriate. Nevertheless--I think impecable blue jeans and semi-flashy shirts. Congratulations on the steady march to the goal.

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  10. I would rather be dressed comfy, then feeling tight & stuffy, wouldn't you? I have given up and really never have been one to keep up with the Jones fashion statement it gets expensive, and so not barnyard or canine wear appropriate, is it? LOL

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  11. Yeah, but there's something to be said for elasticated wastes and chicken shit on the knees isn't there? :-)

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  12. Ah, a gentleman whose taste in clothing matches my own. Well, more or less. Though I doubt you're losing the weight just as an excuse to get a new wardrobe.

    Loved the picture at the top.

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  13. Don't give up on the elastic waist pants, I think you would be sorry if you didn't have at least one pair for comfort whilst crawling around cleaning those little hen houses. No need to be glamorous, best to be comfortable...

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  14. I know how you feel, John. My idea of dressing up is throwing on a sweatshirt and a worn pair of jeans.

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  15. I think you should just dress the way you want to dress. Why should you kowtow to fashion or what's deemed appropriate for your age? It's bad enough that so many women feel compelled to fit a certain image. It's always fun to buy some new clothes though.

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  16. as it's April fools day, I suspect this is a hoax and you have no intention of giving up the scarecrow outfits :-D

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  17. The simple solution is to have Chris come with you to pick out a new outfit or two. Then carefully store them in the back of your closet for "later." Above all, don't let them block access to your chicken-shit trousers with the elastic waists.

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  18. I am busy trying to get my son to wear something presentable for a forthcoming wedding at which I am giving the bride away. He seems to think jeans and a T shirt are fine although it is Morning dress!.

    I'd still follow your blog if you were dressed in woad.

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  19. On occasions when I absolutely must be wearing clothing (i.e. going further than just the local shops or something) I always squeeze into a yellow cycling outfit. You can't go far wrong with lycra and the yellow matches my eyes.

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  20. Where does one buy trousers with elastic waistbands? I've never seen any in my sort of outlet...

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  21. Now you wouldn't want to mess up you nice cloths out in the field. I'd say you dress appropriately.
    I thought of you when I saw this video.... The old school Angry Birds...
    http://absolutelymadness.tumblr.com/post/20162154836/karate-rooster-chases-kid

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  22. There is much to be said for having a casual style. Mostly, that it's quite thrifty. I say, go with it!

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  23. I also love the painting.

    I tend to choose comfortable over chic, and it suits my lifestyle. If you're going to be in old pig muck for the day, no point in wearing nice things.

    However, should you want to be Chris's arm candy, it wouldn't go amiss to have a few outfits that will make you look more fetching.

    Since i telecommute these days, most of my office clothes just hang in the closet. I want to keep a few for when i go somewhere and want to look nice, but most i think need to hang in someone else's closet.

    Congrats on your continued weight loss!

    megan

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  24. Never think much of clothing - trakkie daks, flannie shirt with sneakers in cool weather, and, a blue singlet, Stubbie shorts and sandals in warmer weather. A short sleeved flannie in summer as a concession against sunburn.

    Baseball cap or a knitted beanie for headwear - depending on the season.

    Have a couple of good pairs of slacks and some dressier shirts to wear with woolen bomber jacket or sleeveless vest for 'going out' gear.

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  25. I loved all of this post, especially the painting.
    But for some reason, I keep saying to myself 'John has *Rancid* fat.' The thought of someone carrying around rancid fat just totally cracks me up...

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  26. Well that's blown my stereotypical idea that all gay men have 'style' built into their genes. My husband used to dress in up to the minute crimplene and tailor-made (by himself) wide lapelled suits as a young man. He was still wearing this stuff when I met him in the mid eighties, but the funny thing was that his 70's gear including his swimming trunks, has wowed his grandchildren and young daughters. Bryony is wearing all his jackets now.
    You are going to look a million dollars when you splash out John.

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  27. John, you are the exception rather than the rule! And that makes you all the more unique. This is a compliment. I can't imagine a John Grey with a 'fashion sense'....and I don't want to either! lol
    Add me to the list of liking that painting!

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  28. It is such a good feeling to "have to buy" new smaller size clothes. Are you ready for skinny jeans yet John?

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